


Becoming a King

by LaBelleetlaloup



Series: The Once and Future King [3]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Breakfast in Bed, Court Politics, F/F, F/M, Female Merlin, Gen, Jousting, Love Potion/Spell, Magic Reveal, Mistaken for Being in a Relationship, POV Arthur, POV Merlin, Pining, Season/Series 02, Sharing a Bed, The Old Religion, Torture, that's in chapter 6, that's in chapter 9
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-26
Updated: 2015-05-26
Packaged: 2018-03-28 23:31:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 73,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3873991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaBelleetlaloup/pseuds/LaBelleetlaloup
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Continuing into the events of Series/Season 2.</p><p>Also please note the tags and warning. The warning for graphic depiction of violence and the tag for torture are both in chapter 6, the episode concerning Aredian, the Witchfinder. If you want to read this story but can't be doing with that, send me a message and I'll give you the beginning of that chapter and the end, with as un-graphic a description of the torture as I can manage.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cedric-Sigan

A few days after they returned from Mercia a rainstorm arrived and forced the general laborers inside and a small cave-in was discovered in the foundations of the castle. Normally, such a thing would have been quickly repaired and dismissed, but Uther was called down to look himself when a large jewel and some ancient gold coins shifted with the rubble. Apparently, it was a tomb of some sort, where the first Kings of Camelot had been buried. Uther did not seem to think that their status as his forbears entitled them to any respect, as he immediately ordered workers to begin excavating the tombs and removing the treasure, as quickly as possible. Unfortunately for everyone, Uther decided that meant that they would work day and night until the tombs were emptied into the coffers. The storm had seemed to settle in after all, rain day in and day out, and they certainly could not go back outside. In Gaius’ chambers, they were high enough that the noises were muted enough, with the help of the rain on the roof, to sleep through. Arthur’s chambers, however, were apparently right over the tomb and it was deafening. Understandably, Arthur was not sleeping well and was in a horrible prat mood. Of course, because of the general bad luck in Camelot, the night he decided to send Merlin down to make the workers stop was the night that one of the workers triggered a booby trap in the tomb and died. Ironically, it was also the day the storm blew off. This was right as Merlin was getting down to the area of course. She had to turn right back around and report to Arthur that one of the workers had just died and Arthur looked like he wanted to scream.

“Of bloody course they did,” he grumbled. “Go get Gaius and head back down there. I’ll fetch my Father.” Merlin hurried off to do as bade, not wanting to upset Arthur further.

Merlin and Gaius got down to the tomb a little before Arthur and Uther. It was quickly clear what had happened. There was a pressure trap on one of the stones that caused a poisoned arrow to fly out of one the seemingly decorative crows. Gaius found it by stepping on it and Merlin used magic to block the arrow with a gold plate which she had to quickly let drop to the ground because Uther was coming in. The plate rolled to a stop at his feet.

“…must be guarded at all times,” Uther was saying to Arthur. He looked at the plate, then up at Merlin. “Idiot.” Merlin thought it was quite rude that no one thought it could be Gaius’ fault, who was actually the idiot who set off the booby trap and nearly died.

“Were you born clumsy or do you work at it?” Arthur asked mockingly.

“It’s just one of my many gifts,” Merlin replied with a shrug, trying not to take Arthur’s prat mood to heart.

“Well this is quite a find,” Uther looked pleased. “You see, Gaius, I was right. There is treasure to be found under Camelot. Which of my predecessors do I have to thank for all this? Gaius?” Gaius was clearly hiding something. Merlin was not sure if she wanted to know or if she would hope that if she ignored it that it would go away.

“Uh, I'd have to look into it, Sire.”

“Well, how did he die?” Uther waved at the worker’s body still on the ground.

“He seems to have unwittingly triggered a trap here.” Gaius pointed out the step and the crows.

“To deter grave robbers,” Arthur guessed.

“Well there's plenty in here people would want to steal,” Uther agreed, smiling at the piles of riches, “Have them secure the tomb. Guarding it is your responsibility, Arthur.”

“Yes, Father.” Arthur agreed. Uther swept out of the tomb.

“Could you have the guards move the body?” Gaius asked. “I’m afraid that this old body just isn’t as strong as it used to be.”

“Of course, Gaius,” Arthur nodded. He called the guards in and they removed the body, taking it home to his family. Arthur sent them with a small purse of coins-what the man was still owed for his service and a little more besides. Even in a foul mood from lack of sleep, Arthur was good to his people. Merlin and Gaius trundled off to bed and Merlin ignored that Gaius was clearly concerned about something. It could wait until morning, surely. Both her and Arthur being in foul moods would not help anything.

Of course, Arthur was in a horrible mood the next morning, despite the fact his father was allowing him to go hunt down some wild boar and the weather was lovely-sunny and a comfortable temperature with a nice breeze. She would have happily enjoyed an afternoon in the woods but everything went wrong. Merlin got in trouble for someone having messed with the saddle on Arthur’s horse and some ass came rushing over to fix it. Merlin wondered if the ass in question was the one to break it, since she had done up the girth herself and used a little magic on it to keep it from pulling. The ass was a suck-up and Arthur was in a foul enough mood that he was lording it over her.

“An honor, you hear that, Merlin?” She graciously ignored him and did not tell him that it was his own bad luck that he’d ended up on the ground. “An honor!” Arthur repeated when Merlin did not give him enough attention.

“Would you shut up?” Merlin grumbled. “I understand that you haven’t had enough sleep to be decent but goddess have mercy I’m going to smack you.” Arthur didn’t hear her but Leon chuckled.

“Hey, if he’s still in a mood later, let me know, I’ll try to straighten him out,” Leon offered.

“He’ll be better after tonight,” Merlin said with a shrug, “There won’t be any workers banging and pounding all night. He’ll sleep and hopefully tomorrow he’ll be pleasant.”

“Not with that suck up,” Geraint warned. “Look at him, simpering like a love-struck girl.”

“Oh you’ve got to be joking,” Merlin whined softly, but sure enough, when she turned to look, the ass, Cedric apparently, was making ridiculous faces and saying.

“I came to Camelot in search of work…” Arthur told him that he could be a beater on the hunt. Merlin wanted to beat Arthur. She settled for whacking Cedric in the stomach with the bat when she handed it to him. Geraint was chuckling in the background but Merlin did not turn to acknowledge his amusement.

They set out into the forest and eventually tracked down the boar. Cedric was quiet and Arthur was in a better mood outside the citadel, despite his lack of sleep. It was actually a lovely afternoon and the temperature in the cover of the trees was perfect. Merlin was almost enjoying herself when Arthur’s awful luck betrayed them again. The boar came barreling out of the trees and none of the knights managed to hit it with their spears. Arthur was directly in the boar’s path and the knights had scattered and Merlin’s magic had sent one of the spears out of the pile and into the boar before she could even think. Arthur whirled around in confusion.

“Who threw that?” he demanded. Merlin did not pipe up. Perhaps she should have. Because after a minute of no one pointing at Merlin, as none of the knights had been paying attention to anything, thankfully, Cedric raised his hand. Arthur believed him. Leon and Geraint eyed him suspiciously. Merlin made a face that she knew the knights would attribute to simple jealousy about the fact Arthur was thanking Cedric profusely and giving him a position in the royal household. Merlin was tempted to put one of Cedric’s eyes out. Whatever he wanted that his life goal was to get close to Arthur, it was not going to be good.

Merlin stomped into Gaius’ chambers when they got back to the castle, needing a short respite from this horrible day.

“What’s wrong?” Gaius asked gently.

“I saved Arthur’s life and someone else took the credit for it,” Merlin told him. “I’d be fine with it, Arthur’s safe, right? Except I don’t think this Cedric is entirely trustworthy.”

“Do you want a distraction?”

“Sure, what’d you find out about the tomb?” Merlin asked. Gaius smiled at her and motioned her over to show her something in the book he had open.

“I found this inscription on the scepter,” Gaius told her.

“What language is it?” she asked.

“I don’t know. Sigan would have known many languages.”

“Sigan?” she asked. The name sounded vaguely familiar but not enough for her to recognize it.

“It’s his tomb,” Gaius said.

“No, who’s Sigan?” Merlin asked.

“Merlin!” Gaius chided. “He’s only the most powerful sorcerer to have lived.”

“Really?” Merlin asked, not certain she believed that. What about Taliesin, the Seer to the ancient kings? Or Kearia, who was centuries old already and still appeared to be in the prime of her life?

“You didn’t grow up in Camelot but for those of us that did, Cornelius Sigan was a figure of nightmare.”

“Why?” When Gaius grew up, magic was still the heart of Camelot.

“His powers,” Gaius looked a little worried even just telling it. “He could turn day into night, turn the tides, and legend has it his spells built the castle itself.” Merlin wasn’t sure what was so terrifying about turning the tides, unless Gaius was not talking about water but war. And all of it would be legend at this point, if he built the castle.

“Well, what happened?” Merlin asked.

“Sigan grew too powerful and the king at the time ordered his execution,” Gaius replied mildly.

“Well, the execution succeeded?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Then why were you so distressed last night?”

“Sigan couldn’t bear the thought that his power and wealth would die with him so he sought to conquer death somehow.”

“You fear he may have succeeded and the answer was buried in the tomb with him,” Merlin surmised. Gaius nodded. “Well, at least you’re the only one besides Uther and Arthur allowed in. You aren’t going to get yourself enchanted.”

“No, but I ought to speak to Uther about it anyway,” Gaius said agreeably. “And I think you probably ought to run and fetch Arthur’s supper before he gets into a mood over it.” Merlin made a face at him, but she knew he was right so she hurried off to feed the prat.

Arthur was in a slightly better mood at the prospect of a full night’s rest, but he was not yet in good humor. He insisted that Merlin bring him mead, a little too much mead, and then dismissed her. She knew there was going to be a mess to clean up in the morning. She just did not realize what sort of mess there would be to clean up. Morgana had a nightmare and woke herself screaming. Normally, this would not have affected Merlin, but Morgana was somehow screaming in her mind as well as aloud and it woke Merlin. She sat straight up in bed, barely managing to hold in her own scream at being woken in such a manner. It took a while to calm herself down enough to get back to sleep. She then had to be roused by Gaius in the morning because of her interrupted sleep, which meant she was a half hour late with the prince’s breakfast. As he had nothing in particular to do that morning, Merlin thought that he was going to be grateful for the extra sleep. But no, she arrived to find him awake and dressed with breakfast already on the table. Cedric was puttering around Arthur’s clean chambers behind him. Suddenly Merlin understood exactly how the other servants could get so possessive of their chores. Cedric had somehow just put her out of work and made her look foolish.

“Is that dinner?” Arthur teased.

“It was breakfast. I’ll remove it. I did not realize that you had asked Cedric to wake you so early,” Merlin replied. “I had thought that since you did not have patrol or council this morning that you would appreciate a little extra sleep, given that the excavations had interrupted your sleep all week and you had so much mead last night.” Arthur blinked at her, probably startled that she was not simply teasing back.

“I did not have to ask Cedric to come wake me, he has initiative,” Arthur grumbled.

“Is there anything else you need doing?” Merlin asked through gritted teeth.

“No, Cedric got it all covered,” Arthur grinned smarmily back at her. Maybe she could put his eye out. Surely a King could rule just fine with a missing eye?

“I regret Sire that there is one thing I failed to do,” Cedric did not look like he regretted it in the slightest. “Muck out your horses.” Merlin might very well end up taking Faolan up on his less than subtle flirtations if Arthur…

“Off you go, then,” Arthur shooed at her. She was going to spend the night in Faolan’s bed and get a hickey on her neck the size of a horseshoe. Merlin just spun on her heel and stomped out of Arthur’s chambers. She headed to Morgana’s chambers. Morgana probably had been awake since whenever she had woken Merlin and would likely at least appreciate that Merlin arrived bearing food as well as concern. Merlin swept up the stairs to Morgana’s chambers and knocked. Gwen opened the door and happily let her in. Gaius was already there.

“Hello!”

“Hey, I got thrown out of Arthur’s chambers, anyone hungry?” Merlin proffered the tray in her arms.

“Arthur did what?” Morgana demanded. Gwen took the tray from Merlin’s arms with a smile and set it on the table.

“That boy you didn’t think was trustworthy took your job?” Gaius asked. Merlin nodded gloomily.

“Arthur asked for a full tankard of mead last night and he’s barely slept all week because of the excavations so apparently I was supposed to be there at dawn to wake him because it shows initiative,” Merlin grumbled.

“Oh, no,” Morgana sympathized. “I’ll tell him off for you.”

“No, I’ll do it later, after I go muck out the stables and take Faolan up on his less than subtle flirting,” Merlin assured her. Morgana laughed brightly.

“Alright, tell me all about this,” she insisted.

“Well, Faolan’s one of the stable hands, you know, the one that’s actually supposed to muck out Arthur’s stables? And since I first got here, he’s been a little too friendly and always wants to chat when I’m in the stables. I’ve mostly tried to ignore it, but if Arthur wants to be rude, I can show up in the morning with a bruise the size of a horseshoe on my neck.”

“Oh?” Morgana raised both eyebrows.

“You should have seen his reaction to the one on my collarbone when I came back from Midsummer,” she told her. “Arthur literally went speechless and then he poked it and started nagging me about it until I told him who it was from.”

“Oh ho, well that’s one way to get back at him for being such a prat,” Morgana agreed.

“And he’ll be too busy staring at it to argue with me when I tell him how horrid he’s been,” Merlin concluded. Gaius laughed.

“That’s certainly one method for cheering Morgana up,” he commented. Merlin blushed as she looked over at Gaius. He just shook his head at her, brushing it off. Gwen was horrified, as was to be expected. But thankfully, it was the type of horrified where she could not believe Merlin was discussing such a thing with Morgana, not horror that Merlin had clearly known Gwen was interested and been ignoring her advances. “Well, Morgana, I can assure you that one raven does not mean your nightmares are returning,” Gaius said kindly. “As long as you’re still taking the sleeping draught I prepared for you, everything should be fine.”

“Did you know that Sigan means raven?” Merlin asked. Morgana shook her head, scrunching her face up with confusion. “The tomb that the workers found is Sigan’s. Maybe you’ve heard that before, and just had ravens on your mind.”

“Well, I certainly hope you’re both right,” Morgana said, smiling at both of them. Gaius patted her shoulder gently.

“Come on, Merlin, I think Arthur gave you chores to do,” he said, gently tugging at her arm. Merlin acquiesced, following him towards the door. Gaius would think it was inappropriate for Merlin to be alone in Morgana’s chambers with her and Gwen.

“At least if all you have to do is muck out the stables, then you basically have the whole day off,” Morgana pointed out.

“And you can come talk to us if Arthur’s rude to you again,” Gwen agreed. Merlin smiled at both of them.

“I’ll come back later,” she told them.

“I’ll be in my chambers all day if you need me, Morgana,” Gaius said. Gwen shut the door behind them and they wandered down the stairs. “So, is this you not liking this fellow or do you think he’s dangerous?”

“I’m certain he’s got some sort of ulterior motive for this; everything’s fallen into his lap in a way that things just don’t happen in Camelot,” Merlin explained. “But I don’t think his aim is to hurt people.”

“Could be that word got out about the riches in the tomb,” Gaius suggested. “Arthur is the one with the keys.”

“I think Cedric will get a bit more than he bargained for,” Merlin mumbled. Gaius nodded gravely in agreement. They parted in the courtyard, Merlin heading for the stables and Gaius heading towards his chambers. She may as well get her only chore of the day over with before she spent her entire afternoon doing Gaius’ potions for him while he fretted about Sigan’s tomb.

Unfortunately for Merlin’s scheme, Faolan was not in Arthur’s stables and Merlin was not desperate enough to hunt him down, so she worked in silence, humming to herself. The horses at least were a little pleased to see her and Llamrei nosed at her pocket in search of a treat. Merlin was about half done with the stables when she suddenly felt light-headed. She slumped on the closest horse and then suddenly Arthur was shaking her awake from the ground.

“What are you doing?” he demanded.

“Nothing,” Merlin replied, feeling more than a little confused by the situation. She had had a shovel in her hand a second ago.

“I can see that!” Arthur snapped irritably. Merlin looked around. How had she ended up on the ground?

“I wasn’t sleeping,” she insisted. “I… I just… I was… bending down?” That didn’t sound right, but she must have fallen for a reason.

“Oh?” Arthur asked. “Maybe we’re looking for the same thing.” It sounded like a trap but Merlin walked into it anyway.

“What?”

“Oh, I don’t know, maybe the horses?”

“But I was just leaning on a horse,” Merlin said. She looked around and there were no horses, but she knew she had just been leaning on a horse in hopes that the light-headedness she had felt would pass.

“One mistake I can understand. Everyone has a bad day now and then,” Arthur was clearly working himself into a rant, “But this is one thing after another, Merlin! What am I supposed to do with you?”

“Help me figure out how I went from leaning on a horse one second to the horses not being in the stables and you yelling at me the next?” Merlin suggested hopefully.

“No, Merlin! You’re being punished. Clearly I have been far too lenient with you!” Arthur was livid. Merlin thought she might cry.

“Sire, please, Sire, don’t be too hard on him,” Cedric interrupted. Merlin thought she really might cry. “He’s a good servant, he’s just… tired.”

“I am not,” Merlin snapped back. Where was he going with this?

“Maybe, if he had the evening off…?” Cedric suggested. Keys, Arthur’s keys!

“I don’t want the evening off!”

“A good night’s rest?”

“I wasn’t sleeping. I was light-headed, so I leaned on the horse and hoped it would pass and then Arthur was yelling at me.” Merlin glared at Cedric. Somehow, he was behind this. “Arthur, please! I don’t want the night off.”

“I would be more than willing to take over his duties,” Cedric murmured. Apparently there was a guard at the door because he gasped. Merlin had not even seen him but she quite agreed with his reaction.

“Perhaps you’re right,” Arthur said, to Cedric.

“No!” Merlin protested, though she was starting to think that whatever Cedric got himself into in Sigan’s tomb would be entirely deserved.

“Shut up, Merlin!”

“Arthur, please,” Merlin begged. He just shook his head and pointed at the stable door.

“Go back to Gaius’ and think about whether you want to be my servant or not,” Arthur ordered. Merlin felt a hundred spells spring to her tongue to return the insult but she just bit back her tears and fled. She was sobbing by the time she got to Gaius’ and just collapsed into his open arms.

“Oh, Merlin,” Gaius murmured. “What happened to you?”

“Cedric made me pass out in the stables and let the horses loose and Arthur believed him that I’d fallen asleep and he’s so angry with me,” Merlin managed to choke out. Gaius held her close and rubbed soothing circles on her back. Merlin finally stopped crying and sniffed back her running nose. Gaius leaned back a little to get a look at her.

“How about I get a cloth and clean your face off? I think you fell in something,” he murmured. Merlin nodded, finally realizing what the smell must be. How could Arthur think she had fallen asleep in horse dung? Gaius fetched a cloth and a bowl of clean water and scrubbed her face clean while Merlin tried to hold back a fresh round of tears.

“I just wish Arthur didn’t think I’m idiot,” she murmured.

“I know,” Gaius hushed her. “Someday everyone will know how brave you are and no one will believe that you could get knocked into horse dung by a common thief.”

“Cedric made sure that Arthur gave me the night off and that he would take over my duties. Have you figured out what he’s going to be getting himself into?”

“I don’t think it will make you feel better,” Gaius warned. Merlin just shrugged. “I translated the inscription on the tomb. It says he who breaks my heart completes my work. I believe the heart shaped jewel that was in the coffin is cut glass.”

“Then what sort of magic made it glow?”

“I fear it holds Sigan’s soul,” Gaius pronounced gravely.

“So, when Cedric takes it out, he’ll give Sigan a body and bring him back to life?” Merlin clarified. Gaius nodded. “Of all the weeks for Arthur to be in a prat mood and sleep deprived. He’ll never believe me.”

“Well, we will have to take care of the problem whether Arthur believes you or not. The power had gone to Sigan’s head when he was executed and spells that deal with death and necromancy do not encourage peacefulness in the soul.” Unfortunately, there was nothing they could realistically do to prevent it. Arthur was angry with Merlin and Uther had already told Gaius not to bother him with superstition. So it was just a waiting game. Gaius and Merlin went down to the market and replenished his stores and then spent hours making all the potions and draughts that could possibly be useful or sit on the shelf without fermenting.

The next morning, Gaius and Merlin found themselves standing at the entrance to the tomb with Arthur and Uther.

“How could this have happened?” Uther demanded.

“Well, the gate is completely undamaged, so either the thief had the keys or was a sorcerer,” Gaius commented.

“Well, Merlin isn’t stupid enough to take Arthur’s keys. I suppose we have a sorcerer on our hands,” Uther commented.

“Actually, Father,” Arthur winced. “It was my new servant Cedric who was attending me last night. Merlin fell asleep during his chores so I gave him the evening off.”

“At Cedric’s insistence!” Merlin pointed out irritably. “I told you, I did not fall asleep. I was light-headed and then you were yelling at me. That’s not falling asleep, Arthur.”

“Could this Cedric have had ulterior motives?” Uther mused.

“Well, he certainly wasn’t afraid to go behind me and undo the girth on Arthur’s saddle to make me look bad,” Merlin grumbled.

“He did no such thing, you just didn’t fasten it properly,” Arthur snapped at her. “Do not make false accusations.”

“Merlin, is it the honest truth that you fastened that girth properly and then it was undone?” Uther asked. Merlin nodded.

“I’m always very careful with Arthur’s things,” she insisted. “Especially things like saddles and armor, because he could get hurt.” Uther carefully studied her expression for a moment before nodding.

“Well, if Merlin carefully fastened the girth, unless the saddle was in very poor condition, someone unfastened it,” Uther said steadily. “You cannot deny that, Arthur. So tell me, do you need a new saddle?”

“No, Father,” Arthur shook his head.

“Then you’ve been had by common thief,” Uther sneered at him. “I suggest you go search your new servant’s room. Perhaps it might bring the whole situation to light.” Arthur bowed his head and left. Merlin winced.

“I don’t think he’s going to be pleased with you for a while,” Gaius agreed. “You can run some of my errands today.”

“At least you weren’t taken in as well,” Uther interrupted. “Because otherwise who knows what the thief might have gotten away with. And Arthur will recognize that sooner rather than later.”

“Of course, sire,” Merlin replied with a half-bow. Uther waved to dismiss her and Gaius while he brooded about the theft for a little longer.

“Remember to be wary of the trap stones,” Gaius murmured helpfully. Uther nodded absently. They headed back up the stairs. Merlin did a few of the everyday chores while Arthur was certain to be hunting Cedric down: changing the rushes, making the bed, tidying the room, a little laundry. Then she went back to Gaius and he sent her off on errands. Merlin took Morgana her sleeping draught and stayed to chat. Gwen was off doing laundry, so Merlin complained to Morgana about how Faolan had been nowhere to be found and then Cedric had somehow made her look completely incompetent. Morgana was just as incensed about all of Merlin’s plans coming to naught as Merlin was.

“And he’s displeased with you for not believing this charlatan?” Morgana gasped with disbelief. “I thought you had gotten him to be a little less prattish than that. He’d been doing so well.”

“And then he didn’t sleep well for a week,” Merlin reminded her. Morgana nodded, wincing a little.

“That does make you feel like you’re walking through fog,” Morgana agreed. “He should have asked Gaius for some of my sleeping draught. Some days I feel like it could fell a horse.”

“Oh, don’t even mention horses,” Merlin whined.

“I’m sorry Arthur’s being such a prat. At least making up will be fun?” Morgana winked at him.

“Unfortunately, we are not actually sharing a bed,” Merlin groaned. “It would make my life a little simpler sometimes, I’m pretty sure, but we aren’t.”

“Arthur cares for you,” Morgana seemed confused as to what the problem was. Merlin sighed.

“Yes, and he also pays my salary.”

“Oh,” Morgana nodded slowly, clearly thinking that through. “I can see how that would be awkward. Like my marriage will likely be, I suppose. I’ve been given to this man so I would feel obligated to please him even if I wanted to sleep.”

“Exactly,” Merlin nodded. “Though I truly hope that you find a love match with someone Uther approves of.”

“Thank you,” Morgana beamed at him. “If that doesn’t work out, I’m going to take up with one of his guards.”

“Sounds like a sound plan to me,” Merlin whispered back. They grinned at one another like giddy schoolgirls. Of course, that was when Gwen came in and after being duly scandalized by them closeted together in Morgana’s chambers, she told Merlin that Arthur was looking for her. Apparently Cedric was nowhere to be found and Arthur had seemed upset. Morgana was sympathetic. Gwen was not. Merlin briefly wished that she was sleeping with Arthur so she could appease him with kisses until he wasn’t angry anymore.

As it was, Arthur growled at her, demanded to know where she had been and then had to visibly restrain himself for yelling at her about spending the afternoon with Morgana. Of course, Merlin’s luck was not nearly as bad as Arthur’s was, thankfully, so when she flinched away from Arthur’s temper, her wish for a distraction was granted. However, it was granted in the Camelot way of mortal danger. Sigan, in Cedric’s body, had begun to take his revenge. Strange creatures like the gargoyles on the parapets were flying through the air outside the window. Merlin whirled Arthur around and he blanched, dragging her back from the unprotected glass. Arthur left Merlin with Gaius, his father, and the counsellors in the council chamber and joined his men in the courtyard.

“What are these things?” Uther demanded. No one had an answer. Even Gaius looked perplexed.

“If I may?” Merlin piped up. Uther nodded. “I thought they looked sort of like the gargoyles on the parapets. Maybe they came alive like the snakes in Valiant’s shield?” Gaius nodded and smiled at her.

“The legend is that Sigan’s magic built the castle, and we know his tomb was disturbed last night. It is possible that some sort of magical artefact could be causing this chaos.”

“Would it need to be a sorcerer who had removed the object?” Uther asked.

“Without knowing what has been taken, I cannot say for certain,” Gaius capitulated. “But I would imagine that with the power Sigan had that the objects would work without much if any input from whoever disturbed them.” Suddenly, one of the creatures flew at the window. It broke the glass and everyone scattered. Merlin took the opportunity to run for the dragon. He would surely have a solution to this problem.

“What’s all the commotion about?” the dragon was waiting for her when she arrived.

“They unearthed Sigan’s tomb. He put his soul in a jewel. This vile thief took it and now Sigan is possessing him and the gargoyles from the parapets are terrorizing the citadel.”

“What do you need of me?”

“Um,” Merlin sighed. “I’m not even certain. I need to stop Sigan, but he can’t die, not with his soul bound to the gem.”

“You must return his soul to the jewel and return it to its resting place,” the dragon told her. “Do you know the spell to make the soul inhabit the jewel again?”

“No,” Merlin told him. “Please tell me you do.”

“I do, young warlock. Come closer. I will give it to you.” Merlin obediently stepped forward to the edge of the ledge. The dragon leaned forward and breathed at her, pure magic. She felt the knowledge pass from his mind to hers. The spell was simple and yet she knew it would take a lot of power to complete.

“Thank you,” Merlin murmured, still a little overwhelmed.

“Of course, now go save your prince,” the dragon laughed at her as he flew off onto the ledge above her. Merlin rushed back up to the main part of the castle and then went into the catacombs where the tomb was to fetch the jewel that Sigan had dropped in the dirt once his soul had taken over Cedric’s body. From there, she went up to the main courtyard, shocked to find a temporary ward in the main entryway, clearly more time had passed than she had realized. It was already past sunset. Of course, for Merlin, that was useful.

She gently touched the jewel in her pocket to steady herself and then slipped out into the courtyard. It was deathly quiet. Had Uther sealed the castle? There certainly did not seem to be any knights or guards, at least, none living. Cedric stepped out into the moonlight, Sigan’s magic shining in his eyes. Arthur lay on the ground. Merlin could feel him breathing, but he was clearly unconscious. Cedric’s eyes were only on Arthur. Merlin pushed him away with her magic.

“Who would’ve believed it?” Sigan asked softly. “You, a sorcerer, and a powerful one.”

“I won’t let you hurt him,” Merlin warned.

“You’re going to stop me?” Sigan seemed amused.

“I’ll stop you,” she promised.

“He does not deserve your loyalty, he treats you like a slave.”

“That’s not true.”

“He cast you aside without a moment’s thought.”

“That doesn’t matter.”

“But it must hurt, to be so put upon, so overlooked, when all the while you have such power,” Sigan crooned. It was almost like his voice was a spell. But Merlin had no intention of bowing to the likes of Sigan.

“That’s the way it has to be.”

“Does it?” Sigan asked. “You’re young, Merlin. Look inside yourself. You have yet to discover your true power. I can help you. Think, Merlin, to have the world appreciate your greatness. To have Arthur know you for what you are.”

“That cannot yet be.”

“It can, though. If you join me. Together, we can rule over this land. Arthur will tremble at your voice, kneel at your feet.”

“I do not want that.”

“You would rather be a servant?”

“Better to serve a good man than rule alongside an evil one,” Merlin told him. Sigan sneered at her.

“So be it,” he declared. “If you will not join me freely, I will make you.” Sigan’s soul released Cedric’s body and he dropped down dead on the ground. Merlin let her power rise to her fingertips and closed one hand around the jewel in her pocket. Sigan’s soul flowed into her and then she invoked the magic the dragon had given her. Her magic rejected Sigan’s soul, binding it back into the jewel. For a long moment, Merlin was frozen, her body stopped functioning. She gave into it and a second later, she was as well as always. Merlin shivered a little, knowing that by rights she ought to be dead.

Merlin picked Arthur up and dragged him back inside. Everyone was pleased that Arthur was returned to the safety of the citadel. Gaius was pleased that the jewel where Sigan had put his soul housed it once more and gave her a tight embrace. Merlin returned the jewel to its home and hoped no one else would disturb it. Gaius had supper waiting but less than pleasant news when she got back to his chambers. Apparently, Uther had decided that he had grown complacent about magic and wanted to renew efforts to stamp out sorcery entirely. Merlin was placing the blame for this squarely on Arthur’s head. He was the idiot who wanted to give strange men access to his bedchambers for absolutely no good reason. The door opened and both Merlin and Gaius turned to look. It was Arthur.

“I've come to see Merlin,” he explained. “I've not forgotten about your lazy, insolent ways, or the fact that you called me a clotpole, but I do have to admit that there was some truth in your accusations against Cedric.”

“Does this mean you're admitting that I was actually right?” Merlin asked, a grin spreading across her face.

Arthur shook his head. “Not exactly, no. It means that I have a knighthood to bestow first thing tomorrow and no one to clean my armor.” Merlin blinked at the pile of armor he poured onto Gaius’ table out of a bag she had not even noticed was in his hands.

“All that?” she asked.

“Yes,” Arthur grinned brightly at her and left. Merlin stared at the door.

“Clotpole?” Gaius asked.

“It was when Cedric knocked me out. I wasn’t thinking clearly.”

“Oh, good,” Gaius began to smile.

“I would have called him much worse if I’d had my wits about me.” Gaius frowned. Merlin giggled. She knew that had not been what Gaius had wanted to hear. Gaius just sighed heavily at her.

“You better get to work if you want to sleep tonight.” Merlin shook her head and winked at him. Gaius frowned very heavily at her, but did not argue as Merlin gathered up the armor and took it into her room. She locked the door and let her magic do the work for her while she settled down and went to sleep.


	2. The Worst Plan

With Arthur’s improved sleep, a new knight, and an upcoming jousting tournament, Arthur was in good humor following the Sigan incident despite another week of rain threatening the integrity of the ground for the tournament. Gaius was also in a good humor, as Uther had agreed to take only some of the gold and a few jewels that Gaius was certain were not enchanted before bricking the tomb up and putting a warning about the enchantment on the jewel in the official records. Because Gaius and Arthur were pleased, and Morgana was not waking the castle with any portentous nightmares, Merlin was pleased. Of course, Arthur never stayed in good humor for long, though it thankfully did not appear to be Merlin’s fault this time.

All the knights were on the tournament field, using the time they normally used for training to practice for the upcoming joust. Because all comers would be welcome, though fewer were expected than for the annual spring tournament, the knights wanted to make sure that they showed to full advantage. No one was holding back. As Arthur trotted his horse over to her to get another lance before his next run, one of the knights was unhorsed.

Merlin winced, “That has got to hurt.”

“That’s the point, Merlin,” Arthur teased. “It’s not a pillow fight. Now hand me another lance.” Merlin gave him the lance and double-checked his saddle was secure. Arthur smiled at her and ruffled her hair before squaring off on the run. Leon was opposite him. Merlin was glad of it. Good, reliable Leon wouldn’t hurt Arthur during training. He didn’t. A flash of light off of Leon’s armor temporarily blinded Arthur and Leon pulled his lance up, conceding rather than possibly causing him injury. Unfortunately, Arthur did not see it in a positive light.

“Why did you pull out?” he demanded “I was wide open! You could have unhorsed me.”

“I was fearful that I might injure you, Sire,” Leon answered honestly. Merlin nodded, thinking that would be that. Of course, it was not.

“You had the advantage. You can't afford to hesitate.” Arthur insisted.

“I wouldn't have done if I were facing a different opponent,” Leon assured him. Merlin winced. “You are the future King, My Lord.” Arthur took that about as well as she thought he would.

“You jousted against me in the tournament last year. Are you saying you let me win?” Arthur looked more than a little disturbed by this thought.

“No, My Lord,” Leon shook his head, a little confused by the turn in the conversation.

“It doesn't matter who I am! I do not expect any special treatment from you, from any of you! Is that understood?” Arthur was clearly distressed, so despite the general confusion at his anger, all the knights nodded. Arthur left training soon afterward. Merlin knew that Arthur took great pride in his fighting abilities, because it pleased Uther. Uther would praise him for them and was always proud when Arthur won a tournament. The idea that the one thing that could successfully cause his father to show him favor was actually a falsehood would be understandably distressing.

“How am I supposed to prove myself if my opponents aren’t trying their hardest?” Arthur demanded.

“Arthur, it was just training,” Merlin tried to sooth him. “Did Leon ever not press an advantage against you during a tournament?”

“I don’t know,” Arthur growled. “I can’t remember clearly enough to be certain. What if he didn’t?”

“Arthur, you’re good enough. Trust me.”

“But am I really the best?” Arthur asked, looking a little lost. “All my life, I’ve been treated as though I’m special. I just want to be treated like everyone else.”

“Arthur, you are special. You’re your father’s only son, only child. There would be chaos if you died. Of course Leon doesn’t want to injure you during training right before a tournament. He knows you’d compete anyway and possibly get seriously hurt. I know you were unconscious, but everyone was devastated last May when you got bit by the Questing Beast. You almost died. Who would your father name as his heir if something happened to you?”

“I understand that I have to be careful,” Arthur sighed heavily, throwing himself into a chair. “I just wish that didn’t mean that everyone else treated me like I’m fragile.”

“Well, that’s just how it is, Arthur.”

“You have no idea how lucky you are to be known only for your own merit,” Arthur grumbled.

“Well, anytime you want to swap places, let me know. I’ll sit on the throne and agree with your father and you can do the laundry.” Merlin giggled at the thought of Arthur trying to wash his bedding. Arthur scowled at her. Then his face lit up with an idea. Merlin blanched. She did not have to be a Seer to know that nothing good would come of this.

“That’s not a half-bad idea,” Arthur murmured.

“Well, you can’t change who you are,” Merlin tried to convince him.

“But what if I could?” Arthur mused.

“Arthur, what on earth are you thinking?”

“I’ll compete in the tournament without anyone knowing that it’s me,” he told her. Merlin stared at him. Arthur stared back.

“And how will they not know that it’s you?” she asked. “Are you just going to put a mask on while you’re supposed to have your head uncovered?” Arthur slumped back in his seat, grumbling. Merlin hoped that she had cured him of this ridiculous notion. Then Arthur smiled.

“I’ll get someone that no one knows to go out in my place. I’ll pretend to be elsewhere, send only a few trusted knights off on some errand. Then, at the end, I can reveal myself, knowing that I won on my own merit. If I win.”

“Of course you’ll win,” Merlin rolled her eyes. “And you do know that a commoner acting above his station could be punished, don’t you?” Merlin had learned that lesson well, with Uther’s reaction to Lancelot not being a nobleman.

“Not if he was only doing so on my orders. He would be under my protection.”

“Well, where are you going to stay? You won’t be able to stay in the castle, because you’re supposed to not be here.”

“You figure that out. I’ll come up with something to tell my father and find a farmer to sit on a horse. Farmers know how to ride horses, don’t they?”

“I suppose some of them might,” Merlin shrugged. There was no way this was going to end well. Arthur seemed to have no clue that this was not going to end well. He looked quite pleased with his plotting.

“Alright, go figure out someplace for me to stay during the tournament,” Arthur dismissed her. “And don’t tell anyone. Oh! And I’m going to sup with Father tonight, give him my excuse for leaving.”

“Very good,” Merlin grumbled. She left. Who in the world could give Arthur a place to stay for however many days this stupid tournament took? Gwen walked by with a basketful of Morgana’s laundry. Merlin smiled. Gwen was not going to have anything to do with the knights and she would not tell anyone.

“Gwen!”

“Yes?” Gwen stopped and turned.

“I have a ridiculous favor to ask you,” she warned.

“Well, ask away.” Merlin looked around to make sure there was no one else around. Thankfully, there was not.

“Alright, Arthur is having a small break with reality. He’s going to need somewhere to stay during the tournament so no one will know he’s still in the citadel. Could I beg you to let him stay with you?”

“Do I want to ask why no one can know he’s in the citadel?” Gwen asked.

“Leon didn’t unhorse him because it was only training and Arthur thinks that everyone lets him win.”

“Oh dear,” Gwen winced. “Yes, I suppose he can stay with me.”

“Good,” Merlin grinned at her. “I’ll owe you forever. I wasn’t sure if you still had two beds or not.”

“We never had two beds,” Gwen told him.

“Oh, well, Arthur said he wanted to switch places with me. He can learn what sleeping on the floor is like.”

“Why do I get the feeling that I’m going to regret agreeing to this?”

“Because it’s Arthur’s plan?” Merlin shrugged. “Thanks again.”

“Of course, Merlin, you’re my friend,” Gwen smiled at him. “But I better get Morgana her clean laundry.”

“Right,” Merlin nodded. They said goodbye and Gwen hurried off. Merlin went back to Arthur’s chambers to give him the good news about being able to stay with Gwen. Arthur agreed that it was a good plan, as Gwen was obviously trustworthy, having been Morgana’s confidant for so many years. Arthur then left Merlin with a list of chores and ran off to find someone to play at being a knight. Arthur returned just before he needed to meet his father for supper, looking a little concerned.

“Having a little trouble with the farmer to stand in for me,” he admitted. Merlin said nothing. She knew better. Although, she probably ought to have asked Arthur about what excuse he was giving his father because that conversation ended up being rather amusing.

“We've received reports that a beast has been sighted roaming the forest near the northern borders,” Arthur told his father, completely straight-faced.

“What's the nature of this beast?” Uther asked amiably.

“It is said to have the body of a lion, the wings of an eagle, and the...” Arthur cast about for something, “face of a bear.” Merlin fought back a giggle. “I believe it has been conjured by sorcery.”

Uther nodded, “I would have to agree. It must be destroyed.”

“I'll leave for the northern borders in the morning.” Arthur said.

“But you'll miss the tournament!” Uther protested. 

“As much as I want to compete, my duty to Camelot comes first,” Arthur insisted. Uther nodded and sighed.

“You are right, of course,” he conceded. Merlin was a little surprised that Uther had not seen right through Arthur’s ridiculous description of a griffin with the face of a bear, but admitted that Arthur had made an ironclad excuse for his absence from the tournament.

The next morning, Arthur rode out with the patrol of knights he had chosen, leaving Merlin behind for her safety. They stopped in the first clearing beyond sight of the castle walls. Arthur explained to the knights that he would not be going with them and that there was no beast to defeat, they would only ride to the north and ascertain that everything was as it should be.

“You will meet me back here in four days,” Arthur was ordering as Merlin arrived with her only change of clothes for him to wear back into the village. Arthur had his own blue cloak that he had tucked in his saddlebags, but he had to change into peasant clothes to avoid attracting attention. “You’re late, Merlin.”

“Well, Gaius made me wax the floors. He thinks you’ve left me behind to pine after you, you know.”

“Well, I’m right here and my orders come first,” Arthur said, holding his hand out for the bag. He clearly was not pleased with Merlin’s clothes, but kept his mouth shut once she told him they were hers.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Merlin asked.

“Seems pretending to be somebody else is the only way to get people to be honest with me. Grab my bag, will you?”

“If you want to pass as a peasant, you should probably carry your own bag,” Merlin retorted, picking the bag up and shoving it at Arthur.

“You're forgetting something, Merlin. No one will know it's my bag,” Arthur smirked at her and tossed the bag back to her.

“There must be easier ways to prove yourself,” Merlin grumbled.

“Shut up, Merlin!” Arthur snapped. Merlin did. She did not want him to end up in a prat mood while he was staying with poor Gwen. They quickly arrived at Gwen’s house, Arthur’s hood up to cover his face.

Gwen quickly let them in, “My lord.” She curtsied to Arthur.

“Thank you for letting me stay in your home,” Arthur replied, looking around the small room.

“I’m happy to help,” Gwen told him, before taking advantage of Arthur’s distraction to whisper at Merlin, “I cannot believe I agreed to this.”

“Just make him food,” Merlin whispered back. “He’ll mostly be at the tournament after today. You can make it through one day, Gwen.”

“Fine,” Gwen whispered back. “I’ll prepare some dinner,” she announced. Arthur smiled at her and nodded.

“Merlin, how can I stay here?” Arthur demanded in an undertone.

“You were the one who insisted you had to do this big elaborate scheme. Just be grateful that I found you someone willing to put up with you.”

“I’m the Crown Prince!”

“Exactly, you prat,” Merlin whispered back harshly. “If you really can’t do without your big bed and pillows, we can always just sneak you back into the castle and you can spend the next four days locked in your room or you can tell your father you lied to him.” Arthur made a face.

“Fine,” he grumbled.

“I’m going to go fetch our farmer knight from the Inn,” Merlin announced. Gwen and Arthur eyed each other warily as they nodded in agreement. She had known this would not end well. The farmer that Arthur had found was someone named William, of all things, from one of the outlying villages and was only in Camelot to sell some of his harvest and take back some cloth and salted meat to his family. He had agreed to do this with Arthur’s gold shining in his eyes, but Merlin was not certain that he could really play the part.  
Merlin and Gwen scrubbed him down until he smelled like soap, rather than sweat and dirt. He looked a fair sight better cleaned up, with combed hair and his beard trimmed, in cast-offs from the knights that were probably, even old and nearly threadbare, more valuable than anything he had ever worn. But, he did not quite look like one of the knights. Merlin handed William the seal of nobility she had forged, this time under Arthur’s direct orders and instruction.

“From now on, you’re Sir William of Deira,” she told him. He still slouched. “Imagine you're really...arrogant. Knights like to think they're so much better than everyone else.” William began to straighten his spine as he walked across the room.

“It's not arrogance,” Arthur snapped. “Ignore him, he's an idiot. A knight must behave with honor and nobility.” William seemed to be listening more to her advice than Arthur’s, as he strutted across the room, shoulders thrown back. “That's... better,” Arthur admitted. “You must convince everyone that you were born into a noble family.” William blinked at him for a minute before turning to Merlin.

“Polish my armor, boy,” he ordered haughtily. Merlin straightened to her full height, silently daring him to continue. Unfortunately, his attention was on Arthur.

“Now you're gettin' the hang of it,” Arthur assured him. William brayed like a donkey with laughter. Arthur’s face twitched, just slightly, with displeasure. “That's a good point, you do need to polish our armor,” he told her. Merlin’s teeth ground together.

“Yeah,” William agreed authoritatively. He laughed again. Merlin decided that that was her cue.

“Well, then I suppose I better go and get on that,” she agreed. “I’ll see you all tomorrow!” Merlin hurried out the door before Arthur or Gwen could catch her and rushed up the street to the castle. Gaius fussed at her about not being available to help him for most of the day as Merlin snuck the armor into her room so it could polish itself. It’s not like anyone would have any idea that she had used magic so she could simultaneously help Gaius.

The next day, Gaius grumbled a little when she told him she was off to watch the jousting tournament, supposedly to take advantage of her time off, but did not argue. Merlin rushed down to Gwen’s house and hurriedly fed Arthur and got both William and Arthur into their armor before they had to be on the field. Merlin took William out the back door and snuck him back around to the main entrance with Hengroen, Arthur’s prize stallion and a warhorse. William did not own a horse and could not ride very well, but he kept his seat. It would have to do.

Merlin then went and fetched Arthur, who was in his blue cloak again, and led him up to the tournament tent that was ostensibly for Sir William of Deira. She went off to watch the opening speech and make sure that William didn’t make a spectacle. Hengroen pranced nervously under the unfamiliar rider and William couldn’t hold him still, but he did not fall off, which was at least something.

Arthur won all the jousts, easily defeating his opponents. He was in a much improved humor, but was a little irritable about not getting the credit he felt he deserved. Merlin rolled her eyes at him as he decided that he would reveal himself at the end of the tournament. Arthur was infinitely spoiled.

The following days went much the same. Gaius made her do chores at night after the tournament matches were over and Merlin took deep breaths to keep from snapping at him. Her magic mended and polished both sets of armor in her room. During the day she squired for Arthur and William, thankfully mostly Arthur, since all William did was acknowledge the crowd. With Arthur’s continued success, he stayed in relatively high spirits, despite his irritation over William getting credit for his wins and his complaints about Gwen not owning a bathtub. 

Merlin had to admit that it was odd. Her father had been a fairly successful blacksmith and Gwen had to be making about the same as Merlin made, probably more, as Morgana’s handmaiden. Merlin could easily have bought a bathtub from the woodworkers in the marketplace by now, had Gaius not generously shared everything he owned. And every family in Ealdor had a washtub that they could use for bathing or laundry in the winter months when the cloth could freeze in the river. Given Gwen’s insistence on washing while they were traveling to Mercia and back, Merlin was rather surprised that Gwen did not normally prioritize baths.

On the second day of the tournament, after Arthur and William advanced to the final, to Arthur’s great content, Merlin had a rather strange conversation with a complete stranger. She had taken Hengroen to the water trough between Arthur’s jousts and suddenly a large, and rather intimidatingly muscled, man was standing next to her.

“He's a fine horse. I see your master has advanced to the final. He's extremely skilled with a lance.”

“Sir William is doing well,” Merlin agreed. “Just one more match to go.”

“Tell me, what is he like to work for?” the man asked.

“Between you and me? He can be a bit of a prat,” Merlin confided.

“So you are no longer working for Prince Arthur?” the man asked. It seemed to be a trick question.

“Well, Arthur’s away right now. He left me here because apparently it was too dangerous. I’m just… helping William out. Keeping busy.” Merlin felt like a cornered mouse under the man’s scrutiny.

“Well, I, erm, I wish your master luck in the final,” the man replied, finally turning to go.

“Thanks,” Merlin replied weakly, more grateful that he was leaving than anything else. He had been more than a little frightening and yet she knew that he had said nothing menacing or at all unnatural for a casual conversation. Merlin did not tell anyone about the experience.

That evening, Merlin was heading down to Gwen’s house to see how she and Arthur were getting on, she had already called him an arrogant prat once, after all. Gwen met her in the street, taking a walk. Apparently Arthur was cooking. Merlin stared at her in confusion and grabbed her arm when she started to walk off.

“What brought this on?”

“Arthur discovered he stole my bed and had the nerve to tell me that I should have told him it was my bed.”

“Well, you should have, but he should have asked,” Merlin replied. She would never have let someone turn her out of her own bed. Gwen gave her a look. Merlin subsided.

“I lost my temper. He’s making supper to apologize.”

“Oh, I’ll go make sure he doesn’t burn the house down?”

“That would be lovely,” Gwen beamed at her. Merlin hurried off to Gwen’s house and found Arthur staring at a raw chicken in complete bewilderment.

“Um, Gwen said you were cooking?”

“Oh, Merlin, thank god! Fetch me two dinners from the palace kitchens.”

“Arthur!” Merlin protested. “Gwen was upset with you for being a spoiled brat and you’re going to obviously lie to her for your apology?”

“Can you cook?” Arthur asked hopefully. Merlin rolled her eyes.

“I don’t know how you survived without me,” she murmured. Arthur smiled softly at her. Merlin cooked the chicken with rosemary and basil and fetched some water for Arthur’s bath and their dinner so Gwen wouldn’t have to. Arthur then shooed her out the back door as Gwen came in, ordering her to get him something less scratchy to wear. Merlin rolled her eyes, but obediently went to fetch him a tunic. She stole one of his older tunics, a purple one he didn’t wear too often, and changed hers for his in case anyone happened to notice her coming in. Everyone did think they were sleeping together and he had left her behind while he went on some dangerous quest to kill a magical beast. For Arthur himself, she took the blue tunic. It was one of his favorites.

She took the tunic down to Gwen’s. Arthur thanked her and Gwen just shook her head at Arthur.

“Merlin has good clothes, you know.”

“No, Arthur’s got a point,” Merlin corrected. “This is his tunic and it’s much more comfortable than any of mine.”

“Why?” Arthur asked.

“In case someone noticed me taking one of your tunics, cabbage head. They already think we share a bed, so they’ll just think I missed you or something like that, rather than wondering.”

“Oh, good planning,” Arthur smiled, patting her gently on the shoulder.

“Merlin, was it your cooking I ate?” Gwen asked. “Be honest.”

“I helped,” Merlin admitted. “Arthur was just going to put the chicken over the fire. I added the herbs.”

“Well, it tasted lovely, and thank you for fetching the water.”

“You’re welcome,” Merlin grinned at Gwen. “See, Arthur, manners make people happy.”

“Oh, stuff it,” Arthur grumbled. “Now, shoo, before everyone thinks you’ve taken up with Gwen behind my back.”

“I would never,” Merlin declared dramatically, throwing a hand over her heart. Gwen giggled. Arthur rolled his eyes.

“Out.”

“I’m going,” Merlin assured him. She hugged Gwen and took her leave, noticing and then dismissing the strange shadow by the corner of the house. Gwen had left her washing out, after all.

Merlin got back up to Gaius’ just in time for Leon to tell them that the King wanted to see Gaius immediately. They followed Leon into the main wing of the castle and then through a lot of corridors to one that was only a little ways away from Arthur’s chambers. There was a dead guard on the floor and he already smelled. Leon made a face at the stench but resolutely held in any more overt reaction.

“Can you determine a cause of death?” Uther asked. Gaius bent down beside the body and looked at it. They all waited.

“His neck's been broken. There's scarcely a mark on the flesh. Whoever killed him knew exactly what he was doing.”

“Earlier this evening, an intruder was spotted in the lower town,” Leon added. Merlin felt a chill go down her spine.

“Then I fear it's true, Odin has sent an assassin to kill Arthur,” Uther stated.

“An assassin?” Merlin echoed weakly. She had known that this would not end well.

“Have you any word from Arthur since he left for the northern borders?” Uther asked.

“No,” Merlin lied, “None.”

“With this assassin in Camelot, we must be thankful Arthur isn't here,” Uther said. “Search the entire town. I want the assassin found before Arthur returns.” Leon bowed to Uther and left to pass on the orders. Gaius took Merlin back to his chambers and she debated whether or not to rush down to Arthur now, and risk leading the assassin straight to him, or go down in the morning and hope nothing happened overnight.

“You should get some rest,” Gaius insisted. “At least Arthur is still up at the northern border, running around after some wild boar.”

“That’s true,” Merlin agreed with a smile. She went to bed. Gaius was right. She should get some sleep. The guards would be crawling all over the lower town tonight and if this assassin had not already found Arthur, Merlin did not want to lead him straight to him.

In the morning, Gaius insisted that she wash their laundry, so it was nearly time for the first match, which was thankfully not Arthur’s, before she got down to Gwen’s house. Arthur and Gwen were staring at one another awkwardly, from a very close distance, when she let herself in.

“I almost want to ask, but I think my news is more important,” Merlin announced her presence. Both of them startled. Arthur jolted and then glared at Merlin. Gwen jumped and then blushed heartily.

“What’s your news?” Gwen asked, her voice a little strangled. What on Earth had Merlin walked in on?

“Well, apparently Odin sent an assassin to kill Arthur. One of Odin’s servants told Uther a few days ago and last night a guard was found dead only a few corridors from Arthur’s chambers. Gaius said that his neck was broken and there was almost no sign of a struggle.”

“Well, he doesn’t know where I am, at least,” Arthur murmured. He scrubbed his face with his hands.

“Why would Odin want you dead?”

“His son challenged me to duel to the death and I won. I asked him to withdraw; I had no quarrel with him. But he seemed to have some need to prove something. Odin has made it clear that he blames me.”

“Well, grief can do strange things to a person,” Merlin agreed. “Now, let’s get you up to the tournament grounds before you’re late and William has to ride in the joust.”

“That would be catastrophic,” Arthur murmured. He quickly pulled up the hood of his cloak and led the way out. Merlin pulled Gwen along with them.

“What happened?”

“Arthur kissed me,” Gwen answered quietly, looking a little dazed. Merlin gawked at her, too surprised to be jealous.

“I didn’t know he was courting you,” she whispered accusingly, mostly angry that they had both kept this from her.

“He’s not,” Gwen answered. “I mean, he wasn’t.” She paused for a moment in thought. “That was very much out of order, wasn’t it?”

“I take it he’s a good kisser, then?” Merlin teased. Gwen swatted at her. “You should talk to him after the tournament. Make sure you know if he got caught up in some sort of moment or if he has intentions towards you. I don’t want you getting hurt.” Merlin, perhaps coldly, was hoping that Arthur did not have intentions towards Gwen.

“Of course I’ll talk to him,” Gwen agreed. “You’re a good friend, Merlin.” Gwen went to go sit in the stands while Merlin followed Arthur to William’s tent, who was quite nervous at them being nearly late. Arthur took the helmet from William and shed his cloak and hurried out to where Hengroen was waiting at the water trough. Arthur flung himself into the saddle and hurried to the grounds. Thankfully, Sir Alinor was also running behind. He trotted into the field a good minute or two after Arthur did. Uther looked mildly irritated with both of them but quickly had them start the joust. They did the first pass and Sir Alinor unhorsed Arthur, who went down with a cry of pain.

Gwen rushed out of the stands to Arthur’s side, as Gaius was nowhere to be found, of course. Arthur and Gwen limped back to William’s tent. Merlin saw the false tip on the lance and followed Sir Alinor off the field instead. Sir Alinor was lying dead on the ground and the strange man who had scared her the day before was in his armor. No wonder he had been late! He had to be the assassin.

Merlin rushed back to warn Arthur, but she went by the tent first and just missed them and Arthur was already facing down the assassin again. Merlin used her magic to snap the girth on the assassin’s saddle to keep him from getting in a second hit. Arthur unhorsed him and the man did not get up. Much to both Gwen and Merlin’s surprise, Arthur did not reveal himself when the winner was called. He let William take credit for the tournament.

Of course, then Gaius turned up to deal with the dead knight and had to have a full explanation of what had happened and how the assassin came to be in Alinor’s armor on the field and why Sir Alinor had been tossed on the ground like an abandoned rag doll in his tent. He was livid at Merlin despite the fact it had been all Arthur’s plan. Apparently she was supposed to ignore Arthur’s orders and inform Gaius of Arthur’s every move. Although Gaius did at least treat Arthur’s wound before Arthur had to meet back up with the knights and report to his father.

Merlin spent her afternoon and evening cleaning Gaius’ leech tank. It was awful and disgusting and the leeches ended up all on her and she really thought that Gaius was too amused by her suffering.


	3. Morgana's Sight

It was only a few days later, and unfortunately Gaius was still angry with Merlin about Arthur’s stupid jousting tournament, when Morgana’s powers betrayed her. Merlin did not feel anything that night, didn’t hear anything but a natural thunder storm that had been brewing since the day before, but the next morning, she was cleaning up charred curtains and bits of broken glass. Morgana had set the curtains alight with a candle and blown out the glass in the windows, Merlin could tell. Morgana knew too. She looked absolutely terrified to have Uther in the same room with her.

Uther was ruthlessly questioning Gwen, who was very distressed by the whole situation, until Arthur had the presence of mind to vouch for her. Morgana was too scared to speak. As Uther and Arthur left, Merlin heard Uther say something frightening.

“Someone started the fire deliberately.”

Merlin was shooed out of Morgana’s rooms not long after Arthur and Uther left, to do Arthur’s chores. Arthur, however, was employing the knights to find him the names and known residences of everyone suspected of consorting with any sort of magic and when Merlin would normally have brought him his dinner, he was nowhere to be found. She took the reprieve to try to speak to Gaius about Morgana, but found that Morgana was already trying to speak to Gaius herself.

“What I don't understand, Morgana, is how the fire started in the first place,” Gaius said, prompting Merlin to freeze with her hand above the door handle. She slipped off to the side of the door and listened.

“It happened so quickly. It was terrifying.”

“It's alright. You're safe now,” Gaius assured her.

“You're the only person I've told about my dreams,” Morgana murmured. “I know I can trust you, Gaius.”

“Yes, of course you can.”

“It was me. I set the room alight. I started the fire.” Morgana sounded certain of herself.

Gaius played the fool. “I don't understand. Did you knock a candle over?”

“No that's not what happened. I did it just by looking at it, the flames suddenly leapt higher.” Morgana clearly needed some validation.

“It could've been a gust of wind,” Gaius cruelly suggested.

“It wasn't. It was me,” Morgana insisted, clearly distraught. “It was magic.”

“My child...” Gaius tried to hush her.

“I'm not a child!” Morgana snapped.

“Last night was an accident. It had nothing to do with you. How could it have? I am going to draw you up a fresh remedy that will make you feel better, I promise.”

“No...” Morgana clearly had not wanted a remedy.

“You must trust me,” Gaius insisted. Morgana just left, while Merlin tucked herself into the shadows. Morgana did not notice her and Merlin slipped into Gaius’ chambers unnoticed.

“Gaius,” Merlin chided. “She just wanted some validation. You think she’ll really believe it was the wind?”

“She must,” Gaius told her. “It is far too dangerous for her to know of her powers. Especially with Uther in one of his moods.”

“You have to help her somehow,” Merlin insisted. “I’m not saying start training her in magic, but at least assure her that she isn’t crazy, or evil.”

“Why would she be evil?”

“Why does Uther claim he kills sorcerers?” Merlin retorted. “She’s terrified, Gaius. How could you be so cruel?”

“I’m just trying to protect her, and you had better stay out of it or you’ll both end up on the pyre.” Merlin flinched bodily. Gaius at least had the decency to look chastised. Merlin went back to her chores for Arthur, but that evening she went and picked flowers to give to Morgana. Unfortunately, she could not speak to her, because Morgana was sound asleep, but Gwen put the flowers in a vase, at least.

As it turned out, Morgana came to Merlin. More aptly, she came to Gaius in the middle of the night in complete panic, and thankfully, she found Merlin rather than Gaius, who would have probably just given her the strongest sleeping draught he had and sent her back to bed.

“Is Gaius here?”

“Er, no he's not here at the moment. He should be back soon though.” Merlin wondered what Morgana had done now.

“I need to speak to him. Where is he?”

“He's gone to see Uther. What's wrong? You can trust me, Morgana. You know you can.”

“I'm scared, Merlin,” she admitted, tears filling her eyes, “I don't understand anything anymore. I need to know what's happening. Please.”

“Gaius will be back soon. He'll be able to help you.”

“He won't. I don't need any more remedies. They won't do any good. It's magic, Merlin.”

“Like your nightmares that come true,” Merlin agreed. She had to, no matter what Gaius’ opinion on the matter was.

“Then you believe me? You think it's magic too. Please, Merlin, I just need to hear someone say it so I don't have to keep feeling like I'm imagining it.”

“You aren’t imagining it,” Merlin assured her. “And I wish I could help you with this.” Morgana sniffled a little and smiled at Merlin.

“Just telling me I’m not losing my mind is enough,” she replied. “I should go. It’s late; I’m in my nightgown. Thank you for being such a good friend.”

“Of course,” Merlin smiled and gave her a quick hug. “I cannot stand to see you suffer, Morgana.” Morgana went back to her rooms and it was a long while after that before Gaius returned, and he did not look suspicious, or ask why Morgana had been wandering around in her nightgown.

Merlin herself could not help Morgana much. She could not stomach visions at all and it was mostly Morgana’s fear of Uther that was causing her magic to act out like this. No spell or ritual would cure the understandable fear of burning to death on a pyre. But the Druids were pledged to care for any who asked for aid.

Merlin woke very early the next morning and went to see the dragon.

“Do you know where the druids are?” she asked.

“First you must tell me why you seek them,” the dragon said. Merlin was a little surprised by the cold response.

“Does that matter?”

“It does to me.”

“I need to ask them for help with something.”

“I've lived more than a thousand years, seen civilizations rise and fall. Do not believe that you can lie to me.”

“Morgana needs their help. Her magic is acting out at night because of her fear of Uther, which is just making her more frightened.”

“The Witch cannot be trusted.”

“What makes you say that?” Merlin demanded.

“It would be better if The Witch...”

“Stop calling her that!”

“It would be better if The Witch never knew the true extent of her powers,” the dragon finished his statement.

“But why?”

“There is evil in her. Her powers will only make her more dangerous.”

“You're wrong. I know her. She has a good heart.”

“You must heed my advice, young warlock.”

“I won't abandon her.”

“I will not give you the help you seek. If you pursue this course of action, you do so alone.” The dragon flew off over the ledge. Merlin was completely flabbergasted. He had never been so rude and unhelpful in all her interactions with him. What on earth was it about Morgana that made everyone so crazy? Unfortunately, Merlin had to head up to Arthur’s chambers with his breakfast and did not have time to stand there and yell at the dragon about how abandoning someone would bring evil into their heart much faster than helping them would.

Merlin did her chores listlessly, wishing that there was some way for her to find a Druid camp so she could guide Morgana to it. As though in answer, Arthur walked into his chamber with Leon with the scroll with all the names and residences of those suspected of consorting with sorcerers, witches, or Druids. Then Arthur teased her about taking flowers to Morgana and did not notice as Merlin got one of the names off the list, one suspected of knowledge of the Druids. She would just have to hope that the woman really did have the knowledge she was accused of.

Arthur dismissed her and Merlin rushed down the back staircases and into the lower town. She was just ahead of Arthur’s guards. The woman had locked her door, but a push of magic let Merlin in. Merlin had to be impressed. She had barely closed the door and the woman had a sword pressed to her back.

“Move and I kill you.”

“Forridel?”

“Who are you?” she demanded, the sword lowering only a fraction. Merlin wanted to roll her eyes.

“There is no time to explain, we have to get out of here. The King's men are coming for you.” As though to punctuate her words, the guards began pounding on the door.

“Open in the name of the King!” they ordered. Forridel led Merlin out the back door and they slunk through the back alleys together to the side gate.

“How did you know they were coming for me?” Forridel asked as they walked.

“I saw the list of names.”

“You took a great risk. Thank you.”

“I just wish I could have helped everyone,” Merlin murmured softly.

“I should go.”

“Wait, I need your help,” Merlin begged. “I need to contact the Druids.”

“I don’t know anything about the Druids,” she lied.

“Please don’t lie. There’s a Seer. She doesn’t know anything about magic and I can’t help her.”

“A Seer? Grew up here in Uther’s court?” Merlin nodded in answer. “I can’t imagine how terrified she is. Alright, the Druids are in the Forest of Essetir, just this side of the border, near the border to Mercia.”

“So, only a couple day’s journey? Are they on the old path from the Isle of the Blessed to Ealdor?”

“They don’t stray too far from it,” Forridel confirmed.

“Thank you so much,” Merlin gushed.

“Thank you for saving me.” Forridel ran off into the forest, probably heading for the Druids herself, and Merlin snuck back into the citadel.

Merlin went about all her chores like everything was perfectly normal. She cleaned and tidied and did laundry and pretended like she was not going to send Morgana to the Druids. That night, Arthur dismissed her and Merlin took one of the calming draughts from Gaius’ stores and went to Morgana. Thankfully, it was Morgana and not Gwen who opened the door.

“Gaius asked me to deliver this,” she lied.

“I don’t want a potion,” Morgana told her with a sigh, turning and walking back into her chambers. Merlin followed her, closing the door behind her.

“I know you don’t want a potion.”

“Merlin, just forget about what we talked about last night. I had a nightmare.”

“I would never betray you, Morgana,” Merlin assured her. “And I think I might be able to help.”

“How could you help?” Morgana asked despondently, but there was hope in her eyes.

“I saved one of the people on Arthur’s list today. I know where the Druids are. They are pledged to help anyone who asks.”

“I could go to the Druids…” Morgana mused.

“You can go to the Druids,” Merlin agreed. “They’re in the Forest of Essetir, technically in Camelot but nearly on the border to Mercia. There’s a path that leads straight through the forest east to west, and they should be near it.”

“Thank you,” Morgana beamed at her and hugged her fiercely. “You are the best kind of friend.” Merlin tentatively hugged her back.

“Well, I couldn’t do nothing,” she mumbled.

“Thank you. I don’t know how I’ll ever repay you.”

“Just come back soon. I’ll miss you.” Morgana finally let Merlin go and nodded.

“Go back to Gaius or Arthur. I don’t want you to get in trouble.” Merlin agreed and left. She went back to Gaius’ chambers.

At some point, Morgana left the citadel. The next day when the warning bells rang out, no one could find her anywhere. Merlin just hoped Morgana had safe travels. Gaius, of course, not having enough magic to have ever done magic without having fully planned it, was livid.

“I didn't ask you to take this to Morgana last night.”

“I used some initiative, I thought you'd be pleased,” Merlin snapped back.

“Those warning bells are ringing because Uther thinks that Morgana's been kidnapped. And you don't seem overly concerned.”

“Morgana is the Lady Vivienne’s daughter and she can look after herself.”

“Merlin, what have you done?”

“What you refused to. I helped her.”

“This ends now. People's lives are at risk, Morgana's included. Where is she?” Gaius looked like he might combust.

“How, exactly, is Morgana’s life at risk?”

“Well how do you know that whoever you took her to is reliable?”

“She's gone to find the druids, unless you’ve decided that people sworn to oaths of nonaggression and giving aid to anyone who asks are dangerous, I think she’ll be fine.”

“I told you not to get involved!”

“I had to because you wouldn't even acknowledge she had magic.”

“For good reason.”

“No. You don't understand. You don't understand what it's like. You can’t do magic by accident, but Morgana was. She didn’t blow out the window on purpose and she couldn’t control it. That’s terrifying enough, her own mind betraying her, but Uther’s laws declare that she should be burned alive.”

“Morgana is the King's ward. Her situation is completely different to yours.”

“I know. I grew up in Essetir, in Ealdor, one of the last hold-outs of the Old Religion, surrounded by people who taught me how good and useful magic was. And now I have you. She doesn’t have any of that. I don’t think she even knows her mother had magic.”

“I've always taken good care of Morgana.”

“It is not the same. Morgana has no one to support her. She’s lost and scared. Do you understand why I did it?”

“Yes, I do. But that doesn't mean I don't fear the consequences.”

Unfortunately, Gaius did know Uther a little better than Merlin did. A proclamation was issued that unless Morgana was returned to the castle, all the prisoners would be executed. No time frame was given. There were somewhere around 100 prisoners, most of whom were completely innocent. Merlin had gotten lucky with Forridel. As much as Merlin loved Morgana, no one was worth that many other lives. Merlin left that night, to track down the Druids herself and try to convince Morgana to come back. They could figure out how to get Morgana back to the Druids when so many lives were not dependent on her return to Camelot.

Merlin took Duane, needing to get to the Druids as quickly as possible. Hopefully Arthur wouldn’t notice. With a little magic, none of the guards saw or heard her running the horse out of the citadel. On horseback, the journey was not as long as on foot and Merlin rode up to the Druid camp early the next morning. It was Iseldir’s camp and several of the Druids were familiar to her from Midsummer. They quickly pointed her to the tent where Morgana was with one of the Seer elders, a man named Aglain.

“Merlin, what are you doing here?” Morgana asked.

“I bring bad news,” Merlin told her. “Uther’s convinced that you’ve been kidnapped. He’s ordered all the prisoners executed unless you return. We can figure out some way to lie to him to get you back here but there’s one hundred people relying on you.” Morgana looked gutted. Merlin hated to put her in this position, but there was little choice to make.

“Merlin!” Mordred exclaimed, clearly having come to see Morgana. He had missed Merlin’s speech. “Everyone’s here!”

“Yes, but we have to go soon.”

“No, I’m not going back,” Morgana said. Merlin gawked at her, for the first time wondering if maybe the dragon did know something she did not.

“But… all those people, Morgana.”

“I’m safe here,” Morgana looked upset by the decision, but she was firm in it. “I don’t expect you to understand my position. But I can’t go back to Uther.”

“Well, I can’t make you do anything,” Merlin agreed sadly. “I’ll try to find a way to get the prisoners out before Uther runs out of patience.”

“What prisoners?” Mordred asked.

“Uther’s decided Morgana was kidnapped because she didn’t tell him she was leaving,” Merlin explained carefully. “He’s had a few people arrested that he thought might have been involved.”

“But they’re all innocent,” Mordred protested.

“Yes,” Merlin agreed. “Which is why I better go. I have to help them.” Merlin was heading for the exit when one of the Druids rushed in.

“The prince and the guards are here.”

“What?” Merlin was surprised.

“They followed us,” Morgana whispered in horror.

“Go,” Merlin pushed her towards the Druid. “Take Mordred. I’ll try to help as much as I can.” Morgana grabbed Mordred’s hand and they both hurried off with the Druid man. Merlin took a deep breath, undid the spells turning her into a boy, and ducked out of the tent. She started throwing the guards’ swords deep into the ground. The Druids were sworn not to fight back and this could easily turn to massacre. The guards who hadn’t run after the fleeing Druids soon recognized Merlin as the only threat and converged on her. Merlin, though, was not held to any nonaggression vows and she fought them off, trying not to kill any of them while still keeping herself and the Druids safe.

“Prince Arthur! We have the Lady Morgana!” The words echoed through the forest. Merlin hoped that Mordred had not gotten caught with Morgana. He was only a boy. After a moment, all the guards followed Arthur’s signal to retreat, taking Morgana back to Camelot. Merlin called the Druids back and helped them rebuild their encampment a little before setting off. It would not be good if she caught up to Arthur on the way back after all.

Merlin did manage to catch up to Arthur and Morgana and the guards on the way back, but she was not stopping to make camp and only had to use a little bit of magic to sneak past them. She put Duane back in the stable, put up her tack and rubbed the poor exhausted horse down before sneaking back into Gaius’ chambers. He woke as she opened the door and smiled.

“Good. You’re alright. Now was it you who took the grate off its hinges?”

“No, I took one of Arthur’s horses and rode out over the drawbridge,” Merlin replied, blinking in confusion.

“Well, then, I guess it was Morgana’s tracks they were following,” Gaius mused. Then he shook himself. “I’m glad you’re safe. What happened?”

“I gather you assumed that I went to tell Morgana about Uther’s proclamation.”

“Yes,” Gaius nodded.

“She didn’t want to come back, so I was about to head back here and try to figure out some way to get as many of the prisoners out as possible before Uther’s patience ran out. But Arthur had followed one of our trails, I guess Morgana’s, and the guards attacked the camp. Morgana tried to run and I tried to help keep the Druids safe. Before you fuss at me, I made sure none of the guards would know it was me. Someone caught up to Morgana and they’re bringing her back. They’ll be here about midmorning, probably, maybe dinnertime.”

“Well, I’d rather Morgana be back than you try to rescue a hundred prisoners.”

“Honestly, me too,” Merlin admitted. “I should get some sleep.”

“I’m certain you’re exhausted.” Gaius let her go to her room and Merlin was asleep before her head even hit the pillow. The next day, Gaius didn’t wake her until Arthur and Morgana rode into the main courtyard. Merlin at least felt less like death, but she was still tired. Arthur, thankfully, had not noticed that he was one horse short when he left. But he did tease her mercilessly about apparently “pining” over Morgana. It seemed that Merlin had been missed before Arthur left to track Morgana’s trail and Arthur had decided that she was sitting around moping and pining for Morgana.

Arthur spent the afternoon mostly lazing around, recuperating from the supposed rescue mission. Morgana closeted herself in her room for the afternoon. Arthur thought that she was coming to terms with whatever frights she had experienced during her kidnapping. Merlin just kept her mouth shut. Arthur attributed it to her worrying about Morgana and just teased her about it. Then once she brought his supper, he told her to go ahead and go, and that meant Merlin could check on Morgana. Merlin could have kissed him. She rushed off to Morgana’s chambers and knocked on the door. Morgana opened the door.

“Merlin,” she smiled softly.

“My Lady,” Merlin murmured back. Morgana stood aside and let her in. “I wanted to check that you were alright.”

“I'm fine. What was said in the woods...”

“You can trust me, Morgana. I won't tell anyone,” she promised.

“Thank you, Merlin. I know now who I really am,” Morgana smiled. “And it isn't something to be scared of. Maybe one day people will come to see magic as a force for good.”

“I hope so… It's good to have you back.”

“Thank you, Merlin,” Morgana smiled at her. For a moment, tension hung in the air between them, but for the same reasons she hadn’t kissed Arthur back, Merlin didn’t step forward toward Morgana. Morgana broke the moment, stepping to the side and opening the door. Merlin took the hint and stepped back onto the landing. “Sleep well.”

“Sweet dreams,” Merlin wished her back. Morgana smiled and closed the door. Merlin turned and started down the stairs, only to have Arthur’s voice startle her almost into falling down the stairs.

“This has to stop.” Merlin managed to not fall and continued down the stairs to find Arthur on the other side of the spiral. “The King would have your head if he found out, and there's no point denying it.”

“Denying what?” Merlin asked, wondering what it was Arthur had decided was going on.

“Your affections for the Lady Morgana.” Oh. Merlin laughed softly.

“Right.”

“Take a bit of advice from someone who knows about women,” Arthur cautioned. Merlin tried not to scoff.

“Well, if such a person existed, I would,” she told him. Arthur wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

“Stick to girls who are more... how can I put it? on your level.”

“Thanks.”

“She can't be your friend, let alone anything else.”

“Yeah, I know,” Merlin rolled her eyes.

“You can't hide anything from me, Merlin,” Arthur bragged, pushing her towards the stairs to the courtyard. Merlin chuckled softly.

“I wouldn't dream of it,” she replied. Merlin headed back to Gaius’ chambers while Arthur headed back towards his own chambers. Gaius was sitting at the table, waiting on her to return.

“How is Morgana?”

“She’s better, I think. She’s not afraid, so her powers should subside.”

“That’s good,” Gaius agreed. “Does she know?”

“The Druids told her.”

“Well, then I suppose we just better pray that Uther never finds out.”

“I don’t know how he doesn’t already,” Merlin grumbled quietly. Gaius gave her a sharp look. “Well, he knows that Vivienne had powers. How could he not realize that Morgana would have them too?”

“He has forgotten much about magic,” Gaius replied. “And Vivienne’s political power was always more important to him than her magical ability.”

“I suppose that’s true,” Merlin conceded. Gaius talked her into eating a little supper before she crawled into her bed. Gaius had to wake her in the morning, but Merlin felt much more awake and rested than she had the day before.


	4. What's That Wilddeoren Eating?

The week following Morgana’s trip to the Druids was quiet. Morgana had no visions or outbursts of magic. She seemed more calm and collected, almost like she had been over the summer, flirting with Emery in Mercia. Arthur had no crises of faith nor was he the victim of any sort of attack. Gaius was so pleased that Merlin was safe and sound that they were no longer at odds with each other. It was quite nice. Merlin had to pretend to be deaf while Arthur and Gwen had an awkward conversation boiling down to Arthur was very fond of Gwen, but his father would never approve of such a union and he respected her too well to offer her any sort of promises. Gwen, of course, was rather cold to Arthur following the conversation, but thankfully Morgana never asked Merlin about it. Merlin did not know how she would explain that to Morgana, considering that she didn’t even know if Morgana knew Arthur hadn’t been chasing a creature around the northern border during the jousting tournament. However, she was counting her blessings with that being the most exciting thing to happen all week, a whole nine days really. On the tenth day, Morgana and Gwen went off to visit Gorlois’ gravesite, with an escort of knights. They had already postponed twice because of rain and Morgana was excited for the excursion and Gwen was pleased for her. Merlin had a vague feeling of unease, but she brushed it aside. Until such time as something happened, she could not do anything and there were chores to do. Additionally, Arthur was fretting enough through council and training for both of them.

By the end of training, when none of the sentries in the gates had seen any sign of Morgana’s party returning, Arthur was panicked. He practically ran into his father’s council chambers. Merlin herself was running, and constantly apologizing to everyone Arthur barreled over in his haste.

“What is it?” Uther asked, obviously shocked by Arthur’s complete lack of decorum.

“Morgana has not yet returned to Camelot and there is not yet any sign of her party,” Arthur informed him.

“Send riders out to the outlying villages,” Uther ordered. “I want every guard and sentry out looking for her. She should have returned by now.” Arthur nodded and rushed off to inform the Captain of the Guard of the orders. Arthur himself took out a small party of knights, unable to sit still in the castle and wait for news. Merlin could not sit and wait either and thankfully Arthur didn’t argue with her when she followed him out to the courtyard with Duane.

“You promise me that you’ll ride back to Camelot as fast as possible and get help if we run into trouble,” Arthur insisted in an undertone. He was clearly serious about the matter. Merlin just agreed to stop Arthur from making a scene over it. Arthur turned to Leon, who was there to see them off. “If Merlin comes back alone…”

“We’ll assume the worst and come retrieve your body,” Leon nodded. “Merlin isn’t going to leave you, you know.”

“He better,” Arthur grumbled, glaring at her. Merlin just huffed at him. She wasn’t in charge of Leon’s beliefs. Anyway, if she could influence people like that, it would be Uther, not Leon, she would want to have a long chat with. Once everyone was on horseback, Arthur led the way out of the citadel and the knights herded Merlin to ride beside him. She wasn’t entirely sure if it was out of respect or because no one wanted to be nearest him if he was suddenly in one of his prat moods. It really could have been either one, or possibly both.

Arthur followed the path that Morgana had taken to her father’s grave, hoping there would be at least some indication of what had happened, or perhaps even Morgana herself, with some sort of small issue with a horse or something that had delayed her return. Merlin herself was hoping that her sense of growing unease about the situation was indicative of nothing but her own fears. She was not a Seer, after all.

But she did have magic. They came around a bend in the road and it was clear that Morgana was not going to be riding to meet them. There was the remains of some sort of attack in the middle of the path. Knights and horses were left for dead in the dirt. Thankfully, Merlin did not see Morgana or Gwen’s body.

“Check to see if anyone’s alive!” Arthur ordered, jumping from his horse and running into the middle of the devastation. Merlin followed more slowly. It was clear to her that no one was still alive. There was a note on one of the knight’s back, embedded with an arrow. Arthur was going on about Mercian craftsmanship, but Merlin was skimming over the ransom note rather than listening to him.

“Arthur, there’s a ransom note. Some warlord has them.” Arthur’s face went completely expressionless and then morphed into a frightening rictus of anger. He swept a circle around the attack in complete silence. No one said a word, waiting for some sort of signal from Arthur as to what they were going to do. Suddenly he stopped.

“The tracks lead off this way, come on!” he ordered, rushing up the hill in that direction. No one argued, all of them running to follow him. For a moment Merlin saw the king that Arthur would be: fierce in protecting his own and completely unquestioned in his authority. They hurried through the woods, following Arthur, who was following the tracks. It was starting to get dark under the trees, as the sun started to sink. With the sound of running footsteps approaching, they all slowed. Arthur reached back and Merlin took his sword, pressing his crossbow into his free hand. Then Morgana stumbled out into the path, in her undergarments. Merlin immediately dropped Arthur’s sword and pulled his cape off, rushing to cover Morgana up.

“Thank you, Merlin,” she murmured. Morgana looked a little dazed.

“Are you unhurt?” Merlin asked.

“Yes, I am fine,” Morgana agreed. “Gwen… Gwen twisted her ankle. I had to leave her. I gave her the sword we stole.”

“Then she’ll be fine. Father has the whole army out scouring the countryside for you,” Arthur assured her. “Let’s get you home before night falls.” They all made their way back to the horses. Morgana was clearly distressed about leaving Gwen, but Arthur was insistent that she be returned to the castle.

The return trip took barely any time at all, but it was already full dark by the time Morgana was dressed and could be presented to Uther.

“It's such a relief to see you safe. I couldn't bear the thought of anyone harming you,” Uther said warmly.

“The bandits still have Gwen,” Morgana protested. Merlin thought that they really should have gone back out already.

“I believe they were Mercian,” Arthur said. “We've received reports that Hengist has crossed the border.”

“Hengist?” Uther looked concerned. That was not a good sign.

“You must send a rescue party!” Morgana demanded.

“If Hengist is holding her, it would take a small army to rescue your maid,” Uther replied. “We don’t have the strength to send a small army for a maid.”

“We can't abandon her!” Morgana was understandably horrified.

“How many men would you have me sacrifice to save a servant?” Uther asked her with exasperation. Merlin did not understand how his ward was “kidnapped” twice in a fortnight, once from her own chambers, and Uther thought that her getting a brand new handmaiden right now would be a good plan.

“As many as it takes! Gwen gave herself up so that I might escape. I owe her my life.”

“She did so willingly, and she will be honored for it,” Uther said patronizingly. Merlin wanted to slap him.

Clearly, so did Morgana. “I don't want her honored, I want her rescued! She is more than just my maid. She's my friend.”

“A servant is of no value to these bandits. I fear she's dead already.” That might very well be true, it had to be acknowledged.

“No! We cannot give up hope!” Morgana turned to Arthur. “Arthur? I'm begging you. You have to do something.” There was a tick in his jaw but Arthur would not cross his father in public.

“My father's right. I'm afraid there's nothing we can do.”

“How can you say that?! How can you live with yourselves?! All of you!” Morgana turned and stormed out of the room. Arthur bowed and Uther dismissed him and Merlin followed him out the door.

“Shall I go ready the horses?” Merlin asked.

“No, go get whatever clothing you own. The fortress Hengist has taken over is a fair distance away. I’ll meet you in the courtyard near the stairs that lead up to Morgana’s wing.” Merlin nodded and left Arthur to go to her room and pack her clothing. She had little enough that it wouldn’t take too long anyway.

Gaius was concerned for her welfare, but Merlin was not. If worst came to worst, she would just use her magic and save herself and if she had to run from Arthur, so be it. Having to run from Arthur into exile would not be her first inclination, but it would be far better than any sort of painful death that swords for hire might inflict on her. Arthur, in his chainmail with saddlebags slung over one shoulder, met her in the darkened courtyard a little while later. There were two guards at the gates.

“I'll fetch the horses, you distract the guards,” Arthur ordered. Merlin stared at him. Did he know she had magic?

“Wha... how do I do that?” she asked, hoping his answer would shed light on whether or not she had been found out.

Arthur groaned at her, “I don't know. Do I have to think of everything?” He snuck off towards the stables. Merlin eyed the guards. Then she saw a stack of barrels, empty barrels. She moved the barrels with magic and a few rolled towards the guards. They approached warily, exchanging concerned glances. Merlin popped the barrel up on its end suddenly. Both the guards jumped backwards with small cries of shock. The next wave of magic she sent was a little too strong though. It had been too long since she had been able to freely and frequently use her magic and the barrels ran the guards over and they lay stunned on the ground. Merlin winced.

Arthur returned with the horses and stared at the mess she had made. “What did you do? I said distract them, not knock them out!” Merlin turned to him with an irritated expression.

“There's just no pleasing you sometimes,” she groused. Arthur rolled his eyes and dragged her out of the courtyard with the horses quietly following. Once they reached the cover of the trees, they mounted the horses and raced down the path. They rode all night. The sun came up and everything. By midmorning, Merlin was completely exhausted and her eyes were burning and she was certain that it was a miracle that none of her spells on her appearance had failed because she had no idea how even her magic could know up from down at this point. Frankly, she was surprised that the horses had not yet collapsed from sheer exhaustion.

“What are you doing, Merlin?” Arthur suddenly demanded. Merlin’s eyes snapped open and she realized she was on the ground. She had at least landed on some sort of plant.  
“I must've fallen asleep. Ugh, I'm exhausted.” Merlin yawned widely. “I can barely keep my eyes open.” Arthur opened his water skin and poured it on her head. Merlin spluttered at him. “Thank you. I feel so much better,” she said flatly.

“Guinevere's life is at stake. We cannot afford to waste a second,” Arthur replied imperiously. Merlin groaned, but she got back up and back on the horse and somehow managed to keep herself awake until Arthur finally let them make camp. Merlin just slid off her horse and laid down under a tree and fell instantly asleep. Unfortunately, Arthur was still in a hurry. The next thing she knew, Arthur was pouring more water over her face to wake her up.

“What’s happening?” she asked, sitting up in shock. She saw Arthur standing impatiently over her with a grumpy expression. “How long was I asleep for?”

“Long enough,” Arthur grumbled. Merlin glanced at the sky through the trees. She was certain that the angle of the sun was almost the same as when Arthur had said they could make camp.

“Did you get some rest?” she asked as she got up and stretched.

“I couldn’t sleep,” Arthur admitted. His eyes were bloodshot and ringed with dark circles. Merlin stared at him. It seemed that she really had done the right thing in turning Arthur down. He did not reciprocate her affections.

“I’ve never seen you like this,” she told him. “About anyone.”

“What are you talking about?” Arthur demanded irritably.

“You truly do care for Gwen, don’t you?” Arthur, of course, did not answer her question.

“What I care about is not wasting any more time talking. Get on your horse. We’re going.” Merlin sighed but did as bade. Arthur would not be any more agreeable if she tried to get him to let her eat with him in such a prat mood. He clearly should not go without sleep.

Around mid-afternoon they reached the entrance to some caves in a clearing. Arthur agreed that they could stop and pulled out the maps to consult. Merlin thought that if he had gotten them lost, she might kill him. As it was, she just pulled out the bread that Gaius had given her and munched on it. Who knew how long it would be before Arthur let her rest again, after all. 

“The ransom was supposed to be delivered to the Veil of Denaria. If they're holding Gwen anywhere, it has to be there. Which means, it'd save a day's riding if we cut through the tunnels of Andor.” Arthur gestured at the caves before them. But he was making a horrible expression and Merlin had that uneasy feeling again.

“Oh, no. I know that face.” Arthur winced at the accusation. “I'm not going to like this, am I? What's in the tunnels?”

“They're...” Arthur stalled for a moment, “infested with Wilddeoren.” 

“What are Wilddeoren?” she asked warily.

“Well, they're like giant...” Arthur saw her eyes go wide and brought his hands closer together, about a foot apart, “baby rats.”

“Baby rats? They don't sound so bad.” Merlin joked.

“They feast on human flesh,” Arthur confessed.

“Maybe we should go over the mountains,” Merlin suggested, looking at the treacherous journey with new eyes. Arthur wandered over to inspect some berry bushes with nothing edible on them. “Uh... what are you doing?”

“Wilddeoren are completely blind, they hunt by sense of smell. Gaya berries will put them off the scent. So, if we smear ourselves with them, perhaps we can pass through the tunnels undetected.” Arthur smeared his face with the berries. Merlin, unknowingly, started to copy him and quickly realized why Arthur had his face puckered up in distaste.

“Oh! Oh, these stink! Oh, they're really bad.”

“Perhaps you'd prefer to be eaten alive,” Arthur suggested. Merlin groaned softly and shook her head.

“Pass me some more, will you?” Arthur smeared a large handful of the horrid things over her face and Merlin couldn’t breathe for the stench. It was truly nauseating. After a brief moment spent finding and lighting a torch, Arthur pronounced them ready enough and they walked into the tunnels. It was completely black beyond the faint light of the torch and Merlin was more than a little paranoid about the rats that feasted on human flesh. She trod over something and barely held in a squeal of terror. As it was, she gasped loudly.

“I just stood on something,” she exclaimed as quietly as possible.

“That was my foot,” Arthur stated, looking back at her with exasperation.

“Oh, sorry,” she murmured. “How much further is it?”

Arthur shushed her. “Wilddeoren coming this way,” he warned, tossing down the torch and putting it out. He dragged her behind an outcropping of rock, in hopes that the Wilddeoren would be even less likely to notice them there. “Whatever happens, keep completely still,” he ordered. Merlin stayed still and silent, barely breathing for fear. Then the Wilddeoren came around the rock and stuck it’s snout in her face. Merlin thought that even her heart had stopped with fright. Finally it wandered back off. Merlin groped for Arthur’s hand and squeezed it tightly. He didn’t even tease her about it as they slowly eased out from behind the rocks and continued down the tunnel. They managed to reach the end of the tunnels and came out into the forest without seeing any more Wildeoren. Arthur took his hand back and pointedly shook it out. Merlin muttered an apology. Arthur just rolled his eyes and led the way to the stream they could hear so they could wash off the Gaya berries.

“Gaya berries worked. Huh.” Arthur smiled to himself. Merlin might kill him.

“You didn't know if they worked?”

“Not for sure.” Arthur shrugged it off.

“Now you tell me?! Oh! Oh, what's that Wilddeoren eating? It's all right. It's just Merlin. You trying to get us both killed?” Merlin was livid.

“I'm sorry. I shouldn't've risked your life like that.” Arthur looked so stricken that she couldn’t be angry with him. Why, oh why had she let herself fall in love with a prince?

“Well, they do say love makes you do strange things,” Merlin teased.

“What are you talking about?” Arthur asked, but he was blushing.

“Why can't you just admit your feelings for Gwen?” Merlin asked. Arthur scoffed at her. “It's so obvious. A blind man could see it. Is it really that hard to admit you like her? Just say it.”

“I can't! How can I admit that I think about her all the time?” Arthur asked. Merlin felt her heart break even as she was glad that he had not been stringing Gwen along with that kiss. “Or that... I care about her more than anyone? How can I admit that... I don't know what I'll do if any harm comes to her?”

“But why can't you?” she asked softly.

“Because nothing can ever happen between us! To admit my feelings knowing that,” Arthur’s face screwed up in dismay, “hurts too much.”

“Who's to say nothing can happen?” Merlin asked. Everyone certainly thought that there was something going on between her and Arthur. How would Gwen and Arthur be so different?

“My father won't let me rescue a servant. Do you honestly believe he'd let me marry one?” Merlin startled.

“You want to marry Gwen?” she asked.

“No! No...I...” Arthur stuttered before taking a deep breath and starting over, “I don't know... It's all talk, and that's all it can ever be.”

“When you're King, you can change that,” she told him. If Gwen would make him happy, then that would have to be enough.

“I can't expect Guinevere to wait for me,” Arthur muttered.

“If she feels as you do, she'll wait for you,” Merlin assured him. She would certainly wait years for him.

“We don't even know if she's still alive.” Arthur sighed heavily.

“No, she is. We will find her.” Merlin had to be certain now, for Arthur’s sake. If he could not lose her, then Merlin would make sure that he did not.

“Come on.” Arthur started walking parallel to the river. “We've got a long trek ahead. Oh, and Merlin...” She raised her eyebrows in silent question. “If you dare tell anyone about this, I promise I will make your life a living hell.”

“You mean, more than you already do?” Merlin teased.

“Yeah,” Arthur nodded. He kept walking.

“We could talk about your feelings while you walk,” she suggested.

“Shut up, Merlin.” Arthur grumbled. Merlin obediently stopped teasing him. Arthur had not had much sleep either, after all. Thankfully they had not had to spend the night in the tunnels, but by the time they reached the fortress where Arthur hoped Gwen was held, it was long past dark and Merlin had not had two hours’ sleep in as many days. Arthur had had less. They ate what little food they had and stared up at the fortress in silent contemplation. “We'll have to scale the walls,” Arthur decided. Merlin whined softly at the idea of dragging her exhausted body over those tall walls.

“Maybe there's another way in,” she suggested.

Arthur rolled his eyes at her, “Why don't you go and knock on the front gate? I'm sure if you ask nicely, they'll hand Guinevere over to you.” He had a point. Without using magic, which would probably be a horrific plan now that Arthur liked Gwen rather than her and also had no sleep and was in a prat mood, there really were not too many options.

“Fine. Over the walls we go, you ass.” Merlin followed Arthur, who of course, was much better at wall climbing than Merlin was. Perhaps it was that he had love fueling him despite his exhaustion and limited food supply. Perhaps it was that he did not fear falling. But Merlin found the going very treacherous and Arthur scaled the walls like a trained assassin.

“You really are completely useless, aren't you, Merlin?” Arthur teased.

Merlin grunted. “It's...” she gasped in a breath, “harder than it looks. Oh, now you're just showing off.” Arthur had sped up and was even farther ahead of her. Merlin had the vague inclination to use her magic and just fly up to the top of the wall but that would probably end in Arthur tying her up and dragging her back to Camelot to be executed. He was in no mood to be lenient. They finally reached the top of the wall, Arthur at least a full minute ahead of Merlin and he dragged her impatiently over the edge. Arthur led the way as they snuck down from the thankfully unguarded parapets into the main part of the castle. They had taken a servant’s stairway that Merlin had pointed out and they reached the main floor before they ran into any guards. Arthur had been quietly impressed with how Merlin had been able to navigate the unfamiliar fortress using her knowledge of how the servants’ passages were built.

The guards were thankfully incompetent and even though Arthur had pushed Merlin out into the middle of the room, Arthur had knocked them out before they could lay a hand on her. Arthur insisted that they change into the guards’ clothes and Merlin reluctantly acquiesced. Being in disguise might help them get to Gwen.

It did. They followed the sound of raucous, crude laughter to a banquet hall with a large cage in the middle of it. Of course, they arrived just in time for them to hear someone bellow “Release the Wilddeoren!” Merlin wanted to just sit down and cry. Arthur, ever the heroic knight, flung himself into the cage to rescue Gwen, and Lancelot was with her. Huh. Had Gwen and Lancelot been holding hands before Arthur cut their bonds loose? There was no time to really think about it, as the man who had ordered the release of the man-eating rat was aiming a crossbow at Arthur. Merlin took a chance and dropped the chandelier on him. He leapt out of the way but could not take the shot. Arthur, in his infinite wisdom, decided they were leaving out the Wilddeoren’s tunnel. Merlin was honestly a little surprised that with Gwen finally found Arthur turned to find her and yell at her to hurry up. Well Goddess forbid that Merlin save Arthur’s life. Merlin managed to pull herself into the cage and ducked into the tunnel with Gwen. She didn’t even mind that her vision was swimming, since there was little light to see by anyway. Arthur and Lancelot backed up into the tunnel and Merlin threw the lever that opened and closed the gate so it crashed down, protecting them from the beast. A small burst of magic made sure that the lever was stuck and would not open again.

“I see you’re still up to your old tricks,” Lancelot murmured.

“Shut up, Arthur hasn’t slept in two days already,” Merlin grumbled. Lancelot started at the knowledge, but Arthur was leading the way through the tunnel and they had no choice but to follow. Once they reached the end of the tunnel to find a grate over it, Lancelot spoke up again.

“It’s good to see you both. But where are the rest of your knights?”

“It’s just us,” Arthur replied curtly. “We have to keep moving.” Gwen blushed a little, though she looked less pleased than embarrassed. She and Lancelot had certainly grasped hands at some point since Merlin saw them let go of one another as Lancelot helped Arthur break the chain holding the grate closed. Did Gwen not return Arthur’s affections? That could be… awkward. Lancelot and Arthur got the chain broken while Merlin just leaned against the wall and tried to breathe through everything. Her head was pounded, her eyes were burning, her vision was swimming, her stomach was growling, and really all she wanted was to get back to her own little room with Gaius and fall in her own little bed and sleep for days. Gwen was the one to rouse her to keep moving as Arthur and Lancelot led the way out. Merlin managed to keep up with them and follow their lead despite her ever-worsening exhaustion. Once they both deemed it safe to make a camp for the rest of the night, Merlin just crashed to her knees and lay down on the ground, instantly asleep. Arthur shook her awake after only a short time to make her eat. Merlin almost felt worse for the quarter hour of sleep she had gotten while they made a fire and got some berries to eat.

Lancelot was again the one to initiate conversation. “I'm surprised you would undertake such a rescue mission... with just the two of you.”

“My father would not risk the lives of his knights for a servant,” Arthur admitted.

“And yet you disobeyed him and came here anyway.” Lancelot seemed like he was trying to figure something out but Merlin was too tired to even try to decide what it was.

“Truth is, I only came because Morgana begged me,” Arthur lied.

“I think I will get some rest,” Gwen suddenly announced, looking awkward.

“We should all get some rest,” Arthur agreed. He settled on the opposite side of the fire from Gwen.

“I'll stand guard for a while,” Lancelot decided. Merlin was left alone by the fire. She really wanted to sleep, but clearly Lancelot needed to know something and better to ask and get an answer than assume. Merlin followed him over to the edge of the camp. “Is it true that Arthur came to rescue Gwen because Morgana begged him? He has feelings for her, doesn't he?”

“What about you? Do you have feelings for Gwen?” Merlin asked. Clearly Lancelot already knew the answer to the question he had asked.

“My feelings do not matter. I will not come between them. Tell Gwen... tell Gwen that she has changed me forever, but some things cannot be.”

“Lancelot, please,” Merlin begged. He obligingly paused. “I have slept maybe two hours in as many days, but I don’t think Gwen returns Arthur’s affections. I think she likes you. And you cannot make her decisions for her. She’s not a child and you are not her father. Lovers should be equals.”

“Oh, Merlin, are you in love with Arthur?” Lancelot asked softly, pityingly.

“Please don’t leave me alone to watch either their happiness together or her break his heart,” she asked.

“I will stay for you,” Lancelot agreed. “Though if it is Arthur that Gwen wants, I will leave before the winter sets in. You’re welcome to come with me.”

“I cannot leave him.”

“My sympathies,” Lancelot murmured. “Go get some sleep, Merlin. I promise I’ll be right here when you wake.”

“Thank you,” Merlin sighed and tottered back over to the fire. She collapsed next to it and fell fast asleep. The next morning was a little awkward. Arthur was clearly trying to not look at Lancelot and Gwen’s entwined fingers and Merlin was still tired despite the few hours of sleep she had gotten and was stumbling every time she stepped on a leaf, it seemed. The other three took turns catching her if she didn’t catch herself quickly enough. The day passed and night fell before they reached the other side of the mountains. Apparently, Arthur was not going to risk Lancelot and Gwen with Gaya berries in the Wilddeoren tunnels even though Merlin was expendable.

They made another camp and there was strained small talk around the fire. Arthur caught a small rabbit and Lancelot caught two fish for their dinner. Gwen refused the rabbit and Merlin ended up begging Arthur not to try to go take down a deer to please Gwen, assuring him that she just preferred the fish and it was not a reflection on his abilities. Finally Gwen went to sleep and Lancelot talked Arthur into letting him stand guard again, since he had been sleeping the nights that Arthur had been travelling. Merlin sloppily kissed Lancelot on the cheek when Arthur actually laid down and then curled up by the fire herself. She needed a full night’s sleep.

Arthur woke everyone at dawn the next morning and somehow by midmorning, they had gotten back to the horses which were by some miracle neither lost nor stolen. Merlin stood staring at them with her mouth open for a long moment. This was certainly the Goddess blessing her and having mercy and… why was Lancelot putting Gwen on Merlin’s horse? Oh, Arthur and Gwen were going to ride the horses and Merlin and Lancelot were going to walk. Merlin bit back a comment about how she was not in labor and did not need to spend days on end walking, trying to hurry the baby. Despite having two horses now, and a much improved path through the woods, the sun set long before they were back in Camelot. This time Gwen did not turn down Arthur’s rabbit completely, though she ate more fish than rabbit. Arthur accepted the peace offering with good grace, in a much better mood now that Gwen was safe and he had slept.

Finally, just after noon on the next day, they reached Camelot. Arthur took Gwen straight up to Morgana while Lancelot and Merlin stabled the horses.

“You were right, about Gwen,” he told her.

“I’m quite good with people, even exhausted,” Merlin bragged teasingly.

“Thank you for not letting me leave.”

“You’re welcome. I just hope that Arthur transfers his affections before he ends up with a broken heart.”

“I hope it’s to you, so you don’t end up with a broken heart,” Lancelot replied. Merlin smiled briefly at him. She rather doubted that Arthur would like her again, after she had already turned him down. And what good would it do anyway? She could see no reason that would be strong enough to risk telling Arthur of her magic and he would have to know before anything could happen between them.

Arthur caught back up with them in the courtyard and made sure that Lancelot was given a room with the knights while Merlin went and fetched Arthur a bath. Adara insisted that Merlin eat a hot meal while the water was heating and Merlin certainly did not have the will to argue. After a plate of bread and vegetables and properly cooked meat, Merlin felt much more prepared for the task of carrying buckets of scalding water up the stairs to Arthur’s chambers. She had just gotten the last bucket poured into the washtub when Arthur arrived. Arthur sagged against the door as he closed it behind himself.

“Everyone settled back in?”

“Yes,” Arthur agreed.

“Your father has been informed of your return?”

“Briefly,” Arthur grumbled.

“Your bath is ready,” Merlin offered. Arthur gave her a weak smile and walked over to the water. He held his hands out. Merlin undressed him all the way down to his small clothes, hoping that the show of deference would help put Arthur in a better mood. Arthur sank into the bath and a smile came unbidden to his lips. Then he frowned.

“Gwen and Lancelot… they were holding hands, were they not?”

“Yes, I believe they may have been,” Merlin agreed.

“Then I suppose it is for the best that nothing could ever happen between Gwen and me anyway. She prefers Lancelot.” Arthur sighed. “At least she will be happy. And Lancelot is a good swordsman. I am glad to have him back.”

“You still have me,” Merlin murmured. She did not think it would help, but it was true.

“Is that supposed to cheer me up?” Arthur asked.

“Well, I can go get you some dinner?”

“Yes, that might cheer me up,” Arthur agreed with an amused tone. Merlin held back her sigh at Arthur’s affections having turned to Gwen who did not even reciprocate them and went to fetch Arthur a hot meal from the kitchens. Though Arthur then took the afternoon off and spent it conversing with his father in Uther’s chambers, Merlin barely had time to assure Gaius that she had managed to survive the rescue trip unharmed with all her chores. No one had been in Arthur’s chambers, so she had to change the rushes and scrub the scent of mold out of the floor and the bedding had to be laundered and the seamstresses informed that Arthur needed new trousers and a new tunic to replace the ones lost in Hengist’s fortress. Thankfully, Arthur had kept his chainmail on under the borrowed tunic, so Merlin did not have to go down to the blacksmith to order new mail. She just had to mend and polish it. She had to ascertain that the horses were washed and rubbed down and fed. The list of chores felt like the lists Arthur had given her back when she had first become his manservant and he had been completely insufferable, trying to get rid of her.


	5. Troll Queen

Arthur, despite how he must have been disappointed, was somehow not in a prat mood after their rescue mission. Lancelot was quietly accepted back into the knights’ training and Uther simply ignored his existence. With Arthur’s clear favor, none of the knights were cruel to him, and Merlin knew that Gwen always made a little time for Lancelot. She was pleased for them even if she was disappointed for Arthur. Morgana continued to have peaceful nights, not rushing out and startling people in her nightgown or listlessly wandering the castle with dark circles under her eyes. Everything was going along quite well. For a whole week, more if you counted the days they had spent safely returning from Hengist’s fortress. Merlin was starting to get a little paranoid. Things never went this well for a whole week together, especially with rain. It had rained three days in a row and there was a clear pattern-rain meant nothing too bad was happening. It was Thursday, though, and Gaius had dragged her away from Arthur to help him collect pots. Gaius was too old to carry all the pots himself, so Merlin carried them. It was an inexplicable process as Merlin had never discovered what exactly Gaius did with the pots or why he seemed to collect the same pots every fortnight.

Apparently, though, it was down in the lower town with Gaius that the new threat was. Merlin felt the magic from a distance before some man was asking her where Uther Pendragon was, claiming urgent business, and shoving some pepper grinder in her hand. Gaius took the pepper grinder from her, declared it a seal, and said it was the House of Tregor. The woman emanating the strange magic, the likes of which Merlin had never felt before, which was usually not a good sign, claimed it belonged to her and that she was someone named Catrina Tregor. Gaius immediately bowed. Merlin just stared at the woman, wondering who or what she was. Gaius pinched her. She bowed. Gaius abandoned his pot collecting and immediately led the woman and her male servant, which Merlin thought was not how things were typically done, up to the castle and announced them to Uther, who immediately welcomed them in. Merlin felt very uncomfortable with the whole situation. Typically, magic that she didn’t recognize was bad magic. A woman with bad magic coming into Camelot and being happily greeted by Uther as an old friend was likely not who Uther and Gaius thought she was. Why did this always happen to Merlin? The woman swooned into Uther’s arms. Merlin gawked at the spectacle. Oh, her trials had taken a toll… Merlin could give that woman a trial or two. Arthur was certainly not ready to be King yet and that meant that no one was killing Uther on her watch.

Gaius at least seemed lost in thought after Catrina’s audience with Uther. Of course, then Arthur told her that she would be showing Catrina and Jonas, the manservant, to their chambers. When the Steward informed her that Jonas’ chambers were attached to Catrina’s, Merlin raised both eyebrows but the Steward gave her a tiny shake of the head. He had not come up with it on his own, it had been ordered. It was rather an odd thing for Catrina to insist upon. Unless there was something truly unusual going on, one would think that having a male servant sleep in a noblewoman’s chambers would raise more eyebrows than would be worth the attention. Merlin took them to some of the nicer guest chambers, as directed, in Arthur’s wing. She would have to start locking the servant’s entrance to Arthur’s chambers, just to be safe.

“I’m sorry it’s not what you’re accustomed to,” Merlin murmured as she ushered Catrina and Jonas into the chambers.

“Forgive me,” Catrina smiled kindly, “But I didn’t get your name.”

“Merlin,” she answered curtly.

“Well, Merlin, considering we spent last night in a cave, this will do very nicely. Thank you.” Merlin nodded. A cave? Were there caves in a half day’s walk from Camelot?  
“My mistress and I could not be more grateful for the kindness you’ve shown us,” Jonas added.

“You’re welcome. If you need anything else, just ask, my master’s chambers are just above yours.” Merlin left. She went up to Arthur’s chambers to see if he needed anything.  
“Arthur, are there caves in a half day’s walk of Camelot?” Merlin asked the moment she walked into his chambers. Arthur looked up at her in confusion.

“Not to my knowledge,” he shook his head. “The closest caves I know of are the ones the Questing Beast was in. They were a half day’s ride. Why? There’s much nicer places to have a dalliance than a cave.”

“No, I just thought I heard someone say that Catrina spent last night in a cave and she and Jonas had no horses. I was curious if it could be true.”

“No,” Arthur shook his head. “Ignore the rumor. Her trials must have been numerous, but they did not include spending last night in a cave.”

“Well, that’s a relief,” Merlin lied. “She thanked me for helping her. I think she’s lovely.” Arthur glared at her.

“Servants are supposed to help, that’s why you pay them,” he groused. “Are you trying to get a raise?”

“I would just ask if I needed a raise,” Merlin rolled her eyes.

“Good. We’re all supping with Father and Lady Catrina tonight. Make sure my brown jacket is clean. Oh, and go make sure someone’s told Gwen and Morgana.”

“Yes, Sire,” Merlin agreed. Thankfully, both Morgana and Gwen had been informed, but Morgana was pleased with Arthur for thinking to inform her. However, the jacket was not clean and neither was the red tunic Arthur always wore with it. She cleaned both of them. Gwen was in the laundry, cleaning Morgana’s white gown. It was very pretty, with sheer sleeves and beautiful golden embroidery.

“So, what do think of Catrina?” Gwen asked.

“I think that her story doesn’t seem to add up. But I doubt anyone would want to give details of their family’s untimely deaths, so hopefully that’s all it is.”

“Oh, I heard she was very lovely,” Gwen replied.

“Yes, she thanked me for showing her to her chambers. And she is very pretty. But she also swooned directly into Uther’s arms and the last time a pretty girl showed up at Camelot with a male protector, claiming to be the only survivor from some fallen castle, she tried to drown Arthur in a lake.” Gwen winced.

“I suppose that’s true. At least it’s harder to get the King alone than the Prince. And Lady Catrina’s chambers aren’t anywhere near the King’s.”

“That is definitely a good thing,” Merlin nodded. “Morgana will be very beautiful tonight.” She gestured at the gown Gwen was washing. Gwen happily latched onto the change of subject.

“Yes. Arthur’s just wearing the brown jacket?”

“Well, Arthur really shouldn’t be trusted with such matters, but he said that this was what he was wearing, so yes.”

“Do you think you could do better?” Gwen teased. Merlin thought about Arthur’s wardrobe for a moment.

“Well, he does look dashing in that formal red jacket with the buttons everywhere, but I don’t want to polish that. So maybe the purple tunic? It makes his eyes look very blue and it’s one of his nicer tunics. Oh, and the black jacket with the Pendragon crest on the back.”

“Well, that’s definitely better,” Gwen agreed, looking impressed.

“What?” Merlin asked, as though she did not know why Gwen was staring at her. Gwen shook her head.

“How do you happen to know what looks best on Arthur?” she asked.

“Well, I have to help him dress and un-dress half the time, plus I do his laundry,” Merlin held up the tunic in her hands with a scoff, “So I notice when he looks nice and when he just looks rich. Doesn’t mean I’d have any more clue than Arthur trying to dress myself.”

“Oh, that does make sense,” Gwen agreed. “I could have such fun dressing you. You’d look so nice in rich colors, like Morgana does.”

“Oh?” Merlin smiled at Gwen. “Well, I think I’d have to be a little better paid than a manservant to afford cloth dyed like Morgana’s.” Arthur’s tunic and jacket were clean and wrung out and Merlin no longer had any reason to tarry. “I suppose I ought to get these back to Arthur.” Gwen nodded and Merlin hurried back up to Arthur’s chambers. He ordered her to polish his belt and his boots. Why had she ever thought that falling in love with this prat was a good idea? Thankfully, it was soon time for supper and Merlin just had to help Arthur dress and follow him down to the dining chamber. Uther put Catrina to his left, Arthur on her other side and Morgana sat down on Uther’s right. Two of Uther’s servants brought in the food. Merlin felt her mouth water.

“Well, this is wonderful. Thank you,” Catrina beamed at Uther.

“It's an honor,” Uther assured her. “The Houses of Tregor and Pendragon have been allies for as...well, as long as anyone can remember.” Uther was smiling back at Catrina. Merlin held in her laughter.

“My father often spoke of you, My Lord,” Catrina murmured, looking up at Uther from under her lashes.

“And I will remember him always,” Uther replied. Arthur looked a little scandalized by his father flirting with Catrina.

“I'm sorry I didn't get the chance to meet him,” Arthur interrupted.

“I'm sorry too,” Catrina made a show of wiping away a tear with her handkerchief, “For the House of Tregor is no more.” That was most likely the truth, for once.

“Well, no, Catrina, it lives on in you,” Uther protested.

“I only wish that were true,” Catrina replied with a sweet smile.

“It is, My Lady. Your courage, your modesty. And you are as you always were, ever since you were a child.”

“Ah, I fear I am much changed since then, my Lord.” Catrina looked more than a little concerned. Merlin was feeling more and more as though she had been correct in thinking that Catrina was probably not who she claimed to be.

“Oh, yes, it's true. You are far more beautiful now,” Uther told her. Catrina blushed prettily and ducked her head. Arthur looked sick to his stomach. He feigned a yawn.

“I'm sorry, hard day's training. If you'll excuse me,” he said to Catrina.

“Of course,” she murmured agreeably.

Uther nodded at his son, “Arthur.”

Morgana stood up with Arthur, “I should retire myself.” Uther nodded at Morgana as well. Gwen and Merlin followed the pair out of the room, leaving Uther and Catrina to their supper.

“Was he flirting with her?” Arthur demanded in horror once they were well away from the door.

“Oh, come now, Arthur,” Morgana chided. “Uther’s got as much right to companionship as any of us. And it’s hardly like you would be in any danger of having your position as Crown Prince taken away if something should come of it.”

“But at his age!” Arthur protested.

“At some point, Arthur, you will be his age and then your own son will be horrified at your antics,” Merlin pointed out. Arthur made a face.

“I wouldn’t flirt with some woman I barely knew in front of my own son,” he argued. Morgana scoffed. Gwen shook her head.

“You might very well, you don’t have any manners now,” Merlin pointed out.

“Shut up, Merlin,” Arthur grumbled. They continued on to Arthur’s chambers and Merlin made a scene of waving goodbye at Morgana and Gwen because she was being quiet. Morgana and Gwen both giggled at her antics and Arthur grumbled under his breath and dragged her into his chambers.

“You didn’t eat much, do you want me to fetch you something?” she asked.

“No. But you go eat. And bring me some mead when you’re done. I do not want to remember Father flirting.”

“I’ll schedule cleaning up your chambers for the morning, then,” Merlin muttered under her breath as she left. She ate in the kitchens and took the mead back up to Arthur before he promptly dismissed her for the evening and she went back to Gaius’ chambers. Gaius was making a potion when she arrived.

“Would you deliver this for me, once I’ve finished?”

“Of course,” Merlin agreed. “The Lady Catrina is really quite different.”

“Oh?”

“Well, she was really nice. She said thank you to everyone, even me.”

“Ah, yes,” Gaius nodded. “She was always very gracious.”

“Oh? You’ve met her before?”

“Yes. It was many years ago. She was only a girl. I doubt she would remember now.” Gaius handed her the finished potion. “This is for Catrina, actually, with my compliments.”

“What is it?” Merlin asked.

“She’ll know,” Gaius assured her.

“So it’s a test?”

“What?” Gaius looked horribly guilty.

“She feels like some kind of magic I’ve never encountered before. That’s always been a bad sign so far.”

“Oh, yes, it’s a test. See if she takes it or not.”

“Alright,” Merlin agreed. She trotted off to deliver the potion. She heard something strange and didn’t wait for any response before she entered. There was a plate of rotted food, possibly fruits, in front of Catrina, who had been sitting with very strange slumped posture. Had she been eating it? Of course, with a witness, Catrina ordered Jonas to take the rotten food away. “I’m sorry,” Merlin told her. “I did not mean to intrude.”

“That’s,” Catrina wiped a last bit of food off the corner of her lips, “That’s quite alright. At least I wasn’t undressing.” She winked conspiratorially at Merlin, who grinned back. Please let her pass Gaius’ test.

“The court physician told me to give you this,” Merlin held out the medicine.

“What is it?” Jonas demanded.

“I’m not sure. Gaius said to give it to my lady with his compliments,” Merlin told them. Catrina clearly had no concept of what it could be.

“I am sorry you have had to run all over the castle, but there must be some mistake. I did not ask for any medicine.”

“Oh? That’s odd. Of course, Gaius sometimes gets forgetful, a regretful consequence of living as long as he has,” Merlin smiled at the woman.

“Yes, I’m in perfect health,” the woman said. Merlin nodded and took her leave. Well, that probably sealed it. All that was left to discover was what the woman wanted. Gaius was also disappointed when Merlin returned with the potion bottle.

“She claimed to be in perfect health and had no idea what you could be giving her,” Merlin explained.

“When I met Lady Catrina as a child, she had an incurable bone disorder. She often had difficulty walking and her joints were like those of someone my age. It was worse after prolonged physical activity.”

“Like fleeing for her life from invaders?” Merlin suggested. Gaius nodded. “Alright, well, when I let myself in, she was eating rotten food. I think it was fruit. And earlier, she said she spent last night in a cave, but Arthur says that the closest caves are half a day’s ride and they didn’t have horses.”

“Do you think she’s not even human?” Gaius asked.

“Well, Sophia wasn’t.”

“That’s true,” Gaius nodded. “You get some rest. I’ll see if I find anything in the bestiary that eats rotten food.”

The next few days, Uther and Catrina spent as much time closeted together as they could manage without Uther foregoing his duties. Gaius searched through many tombs, but with all they had to go on being possibly eats rotten food, there were too many possibilities. Arthur was clearly horrified by his father courting someone, while Morgana was amused by the spectacle. Gaius tried to tell Uther about how strange it was that Catrina should have recovered so miraculously from an incurable bone disease and Uther dismissed him. Merlin tried to spy on Catrina, but kept being noticed. It was completely intolerable, really. Arthur had seen her when she resorted to lowering a mirror down and Merlin didn’t get to see a thing before Arthur was hauling the mirror back up and berating her for inappropriate behavior.

“Would you shut up?” Merlin demanded. “I was trying to see if she was eating more rotten food, not get my jollies off. Every single time I’ve tried to spy on her, someone has noticed me. It’s intolerable. Normally the only person who even notices whether or not I’m in the room is Gwen. But apparently I’m now some sort of extremely conspicuous person. Can I not just see if the woman is human or not?”

“Rotten food?” Arthur asked softly. He looked extremely confused.

“It’s not the Lady Catrina,” Merlin told him. Arthur’s face scrunched up. “Possibly like Sophia claiming to be from Tir Mor to get your father’s permission to stay in the castle?”

“Oh,” Arthur replied quietly. He looked at the mirror. “What does Gaius think she is?”

“He’s not sure,” Merlin explained. “Hence my trying to spy on her.” Arthur nodded. He peeked out the window.

“Her window is closed. Lower the mirror again.” Merlin smiled in relief and lowered the mirror back down again. A frightful creature was reflected in it. Arthur gasped and quickly hauled the mirror back up and slammed the window shut. Merlin just followed as Arthur grasped her collar and hauled her along, trying not to trip. They ended up in Gaius’ chambers. Gaius started guiltily at the sight of Arthur hauling Merlin in like a badly behaved dog.

“It wasn’t what it seemed, your highness. I don’t believe…”

“I think the Lady Catrina is a troll,” Arthur cut Gaius off. Merlin nodded miserably in agreement.

“Why is it never something nice? Even the unicorn cursed us.”

“I know, Merlin,” Gaius said sympathetically. “I’ll try to talk to Uther.”

“I will talk to Father as well,” Arthur offered. “Perhaps he will think on it longer if more than one person brings up the possibility?”

“That is definitely a sound plan,” Gaius agreed.

“Can I go to bed now?” Merlin asked quietly. Gaius nodded and Arthur rolled his eyes, waving his hand dismissively at her. Merlin scurried off to her bed before either one of them could get any ideas about making her do anything else.

The next morning, Gaius talked to Uther about Catrina being a troll. It went no better than his first attempt to tell him that something was strange about the woman. Arthur talked to his father before council. Uther angrily dismissed him and ordered him not to listen to idle gossip because he was childishly refusing to accept the Lady Catrina. Arthur ranted about being so cruelly dismissed for quite a while after council, only stopping when Merlin practically dragged him to training. Afterwards, Arthur was quieter.

“I’m not really that childish, am I?” he asked.

“Of course not,” Merlin shook her head. “You’re ancient.” Arthur glared at her, but did seem a little less upset.

“I can’t be that much older than you,” he protested.

“I won’t be 18 until nearly Spring,” Merlin told him. “So yes, you’re almost four years older than me and quite ancient.”

The next morning, Uther had on a new necklace, something red that pulsed with magic over his heart. Merlin actually groaned aloud when she saw it. Arthur elbowed her in the side and told her to stop yawning so rudely in public. As if anyone could yawn when a King was enchanted into love with a troll! Only that afternoon, Uther announced that he and Lady Catrina would be wed before the week’s end. Merlin wanted to scream. Merlin spent the afternoon and the whole of the next day fighting Catrina with her magic, trying to reveal her as a troll, in the hopes that at least they would have some help in un-enchanting Uther, if seeing her in her true form would not be enough to cure Uther. But of course, Catrina noticed while she was fighting back. Irritatingly enough, she kept winning.

On Thursday morning, Merlin was accused of stealing the Lady Catrina’s seal. Apparently Catrina did not have faith that she would keep winning. But Uther would hear nothing against his lady and Arthur ordered Merlin to run. She ran as far away as the cistern and waited for nightfall. Then she just snuck back into the castle. Gaius had told her that trolls were greedy and therefore Arthur might be in danger. Arthur about jumped out of his skin when Merlin let herself in through the servant’s door.

“Are you insane?” he demanded quietly.

“Trolls are greedy and you are your father’s rightful heir,” Merlin pointed out. Arthur went deathly pale. Clearly this thought had not crossed his mind.

“But how are we supposed to stop Father now? The wedding is in the morning.”

“I really don’t know. We could try to expose Catrina in some way. Surely he would see sense then.” Merlin didn’t know how she could explain that she was fairly certain that his new necklace was enchanted. Arthur groaned.

“I think I just need some sleep. I would prefer mead but I’ll need to be clear-headed in the morning.” Merlin nodded. “Are you staying?”

“Yes,” Merlin nodded again.

“Alright, help me out of this and then we’re going to bed.” Merlin assumed that Arthur had not meant that sentence the way it sounded. She crossed the room and helped Arthur undress, put his clothes in the laundry basket, took off her boots and then followed him into bed. At least, she tried to follow him into bed. Arthur shook his head at her and pulled her belt off and dragged her tunic over her head and insisted that she take her socks and trousers off as well. Merlin just did as bade, wondering if Arthur had meant the sentence the way it sounded. But when she straightened back up, Arthur was already lying down and not paying any attention to her.

“Why did Catrina want to be rid of you?” Arthur asked suddenly.

“I suppose she realized that I know what she is,” Merlin shrugged.

“But how could she know? You didn’t speak to Father; Gaius and I did. Did you follow her anywhere?”

“No, I kept getting interrupted,” Merlin grumbled. She shifted a little. When she wasn’t hurt Arthur’s bed was almost too comfortable to sleep on. She shifted again. She turned on her side. Arthur groaned softly and wrapped an arm around her waist, hauling her in so she was tucked up against his side.

“Stop fidgeting,” he ordered. Merlin melted into Arthur’s warmth, only just realizing how cold it had been in the cistern. “Oh, you’re freezing!” Arthur gasped. “Where were you hiding all day?”

“The cistern. I really hadn’t noticed, but you’re so warm,” Merlin tried to burrow into Arthur’s side. Arthur chuckled and braced himself as he wrapped himself around her.

“I think it’s more that you tried to freeze yourself to death,” Arthur murmured fondly. He gently rubbed her arms to help the circulation. Merlin buried her face in Arthur’s neck and tucked her hands between their chests. “Idiot.”

“Am not,” she retorted, but her voice came out soft rather than angry.

“Can I just stay in bed until someone else takes care of the troll?” Arthur murmured. “I don’t want to be responsible for the whole of the kingdom yet.”

“I’m not sure you have a choice,” Merlin told him sleepily. Arthur’s warmth was lulling her to sleep. Arthur hushed her.

“What if I want to be a farmer?” he mused quietly. “I could just grow my crops and only worry about whether my roof was leaking and my family had enough to eat.”

“What woman would marry a farmer who doesn’t know how to plow a field?” Merlin asked.

“You know how to plow a field,” Arthur told her. “I would make you teach me, obviously. And you can cook for us. It is one thing you’re good at.”

“I’m not sure your wife would want me there,” Merlin told him sleepily.

“Maybe I don’t need a wife,” Arthur said. At least, Merlin thought that was what he said. She was very tired and slipping off to sleep. The next morning, Merlin awoke to an empty bed. It was dark but there were thin bands of light. Oh, Arthur had drawn the curtains when he got up. Merlin listened intently. She heard no one moving about. She was starting to get up when the door opened and she froze. The door shut and Merlin heard the bolt lock. She still stayed where she was. The curtains opened and Arthur was wearily smiling at her.

“What time is it?”

“Almost noon, lazy,” Arthur told her. “Father’s married to a troll. You missed all the excitement. Gaius burst into the celebrations looking more than a little disheveled and Catrina refused to eat at the feast.”

“Oh,” Merlin stared up at Arthur. Arthur sighed heavily.

“Get up and help me out of this,” he ordered. Merlin nodded. She got up and bolted the servant’s door as well before she helped Arthur out of his finery and into one of his everyday tunics and his favorite long brown coat. Arthur sank down into a chair and put his head in his hands. “What on earth am I supposed to do?” he mumbled.

“I wish I knew,” Merlin told him honestly. Arthur looked up at her and groaned.

“I’m going back to bed. Father’s going to be with a troll all afternoon and there’s nothing for me to do and I really don’t think I can go out on the training field today.” Arthur stood back up and let his brown coat fall off his shoulders. Merlin picked it up and folded it while Arthur took off his belt and pulled the tunic over his head. Arthur kicked off his boots and padded over to the bed and got under the covers. Merlin folded up Arthur’s shirt and put his boots at the foot of the bed and then wondered what she would do to keep herself occupied. “Come to bed,” Arthur ordered. Merlin acquiesced and soon found herself tucked up against Arthur’s side like she had been the night before. It was nice and she felt herself sinking into him again.

“I know we’ll expose her eventually,” Merlin told him. “It’s only been a few days, after all.”

“I don’t want to even think about it,” Arthur mumbled. They lay there in silence for a moment before Arthur quietly asked, “Will you tell me a story?”

“What kind of story?”

“Something with a happy ending,” he said.

“Once upon a time, there was a prince without a throne,” Merlin said, turning to one of her favorite childhood bedtime stories. “He was everything that a prince should be, brave and noble and true, but his throne belonged to another through a frankly ridiculous line of succession.”

“What sort of story is this?” Arthur demanded.

“Hush, Arthur, it was my favorite bedtime story as a child, and it’s got a happy ending.”

“If you say so,” he muttered.

“The King on the throne was cruel and thoughtless. He taxed the people more than they owned and it pained the Prince’s heart to see his people suffer. When he began a campaign to take the throne that was rightfully his, all his people rallied behind him. Even the King’s knights turned to the Prince, more and more with every battle they won, until the King was left alone in his castle with just a few men. The Prince took the castle in a day and was crowned King to much rejoicing. Despite what some of his men wanted him to do, the new King granted clemency to the man who had had the throne before him. He merely sent him away, so he would cause no more trouble. He ruled his land justly and his people adored him and the kingdom flourished. But the King still saw that the peoples of other Kingdoms were mistreated and overtaxed. It saddened his heart and he conquered all the kingdoms one by one until he had brought peace and prosperity to all the peoples in all the lands of Albion. Even though his holdings were vast, the King ruled them all fairly and kept all of his people safe from warlords and beasts and invaders. All of his people adored him and they called him the greatest King that Albion had ever known. And the King went down in legend as the Great King, the High King of All Albion, and the people had such faith in their King that they swore that when their need was great, he would rise to power again to protect them from tyranny.”

“That is a nice story,” Arthur agreed. “I think I’ve heard it before.”

“I wouldn’t be surprised,” Merlin shrugged. “It’s a prophecy, not just a bedtime story. And when your father first rose to power, everyone thought that he would be the High King it spoke of. Of course, your father never conquered all of Albion, so they were probably wrong.”

“That’s a nice thought, though,” Arthur murmured. “That the man you’ve sworn to serve is destined to be a great king. I can only hope that my people think half so highly of me when I take the throne.”

“They will,” Merlin promised. Arthur turned to her with surprise. “What? I can be sincere on occasion.”

“Thank you,” Arthur murmured. “Now tell me another story.”

“Once upon a time, I used to be able to find time to visit Morgana…” Merlin teased. Arthur groaned and swatted at her. “Once upon a time, there was a prat prince named Arthur?”

“That sounds better,” Arthur mumbled. “Tell me about myself.”

“He threw daggers at his squire when he was feeling insecure and he drank mead when he was upset and threw his things all across the room, just to be spiteful, and he never listened to people when they wanted him to be careful. But sometimes, if you caught him at the right moment, he would rush out on a dangerous mission to save a servant, or save a young boy from being put to death, or ask his manservant to insult him to keep his father’s ward in good spirits. He was mostly insufferable and completely rotten, but occasionally he would forget himself and be actually quite lovely.”

“I’m not a lady, Merlin. I’m not lovely.”

“I didn’t mean your appearance,” Merlin grumbled. “I meant sometimes you’re actually really quite nice to people, and not even to get anything in return.” Arthur hummed softly back at her. “And despite the fact that his knights didn’t want to knock him off his horse in practice and keep him from competing in the tournament, they were not actually letting him win and Arthur was being a big baby about the whole thing.”

“Oh, hush,” Arthur grumbled.

“You’re a really good warrior, Arthur,” she mumbled. “You don’t need to doubt yourself.”

“Thanks,” Arthur whispered back. They stayed curled up together in bed until Morgana tried to knock the door in around suppertime. Arthur got up and pulled his tunic on and went to the door to keep her from breaking it. Merlin closed the curtains around the bed and settled back down. Morgana insisted that Arthur eat with her and Gwen and Arthur grumbled about it but eventually caved. Merlin just curled back up and took a nap. Arthur woke her up a couple hours later with a tankard of mead and a simple meal of bread and cheese. Merlin happily scarfed them down, only just realizing that she hadn’t eaten since the day before. While Merlin was eating, Gaius showed up. Arthur let him in.

“Merlin!” Gaius gasped. “Have you been here the whole time?”

“No, I spent yesterday in the cistern. I just came back to make sure that Catrina hadn’t decided Uther’s rightful heir was expendable.” Gaius blanched. Was Merlin the only one who considered these sorts of things? Hadn’t they lived at court for too many years for them not to consider those sorts of things?

“Have you found anything?” Arthur asked.

“Not yet. I’ve been researching troll magic and it’s very powerful. If we could somehow cut the troll off from whatever she’s using to look like Catrina, assuming it’s a spell or enchanted object, that might work. Surely Uther would have to believe his own eyes. But I’m not even sure that it isn’t her own magic. Although, I’ve read that one way to release a man from a troll’s enchantment is to get him to cry tears of true remorse.”

“I’m not sure Father ever cries,” Arthur said. “Is there any way you could search Catrina’s chambers? You could see if there was anything to find.”

“I don’t think it’s the troll’s magic. That would have to be extremely powerful, to hold her in a form so alien to her own, especially for so long.”

“I can try to search Catrina’s chambers,” Gaius agreed. “And I will warn you that you should not spend tomorrow in bed, Arthur. Catrina has asked your father to raise the taxes on the people and your knights are to collect them tomorrow.”

“But the people are already paying as much as they can spare,” Arthur protested. “This isn’t right.”

“No, and you have to be the one to pardon their taxes, Arthur,” Merlin spoke up. “The knights don’t have the power to do that, but you do.” Arthur nodded.

“Gaius, go try to figure out some way to rid my father of the troll. I’ll protect the people tomorrow.”

“Of course, your highness.” Gaius bowed and left the room. Arthur bolted the door shut behind him.

“I hate this.”

“I know.” They sat quietly with their own thoughts until Arthur decided it was time for bed. The next morning, Merlin woke to a timid servant trying to wake Arthur without opening the curtains. She shook Arthur awake and he grunted at her, rolling away from her hands.

“Sire?” the servant sounded less timid. “Are you awake? I’ve brought your breakfast and I’m afraid it will get cold.”

“Yes, I’m getting up,” Arthur grumbled. He pulled the covers over Merlin’s head before he opened the curtains.

“I brought enough for two,” the servant whispered. “If I haven’t overstepped.”

“Who let you in?” Arthur asked, looking at the open door to his chambers.

“Sir Leon.” Merlin could hear the servant flinch.

“Oh, yes, I’d forgotten he has a key,” Arthur said to himself. “You’re dismissed. And close the door behind you.”

“Sire,” Leon said. Merlin wondered when he had entered the room.

“Leon,” Arthur replied. The door closed, presumably behind the servant.

“How’s Merlin? Geraint’s anxious about him.”

“Come out, Merlin,” Arthur ordered. Merlin crawled out of Arthur’s bed, hurriedly pulling her trousers on.

“Is that bacon?” she asked happily. Arthur rolled his eyes at her.

“He’s fine.”

“I’m eating bacon!” Merlin announced. Leon looked just as fondly amused as Arthur did. Arthur did not even protest as Merlin handed him a single piece of bacon and ate the rest herself.

“Have you heard about the new tax?” Leon asked.

“Gaius informed me. There’s no way the people can pay it.”

“No, they give as much as they can as it is,” Leon agreed.

“I’m going to pardon it.”

“The King will not be pleased with you,” Leon warned.

“Oh, like anyone cares what he thinks anyway,” Merlin grumbled. Arthur gave her a warning look.

“Your head staying attached to your shoulders cares what Father thinks,” he snapped at her. Merlin flinched. Leon flinched as well.

“Why did the Lady Catrina accuse Merlin of stealing her seal?” Leon asked.

“Because she’s…” Arthur clapped a hand over her mouth.

“Hush, Merlin,” he ordered. “Eat your food.” Gaius came rushing in.

“I found something!” he announced happily, holding up a brown potion bottle. Merlin grinned at him. “I think we can…”

“Gaius!” Arthur cut him off. Leon winced and nodded.

“I can see I’ve overstayed my welcome,” he said awkwardly. “I will take my leave, with your highness’ permission.”

“Catrina is a troll,” Merlin announced. Arthur glared at her. Leon’s mouth fell open and he gawked at her. Then he looked at Arthur and then to Gaius.

“Do you mean that literally?” he asked. Gaius shut the door.

“Unfortunately, we mean that very literally,” Gaius told him. “I went by Catrina’s chambers after I left here last night and I saw Catrina drink something out of this bottle and a patch of troll skin disappeared and then she went to the King’s chambers so I took it and I put an identical bottle with a tonic that tastes the same and does nothing in its place. Hopefully, when her last dose wears off, Uther will come to his senses.”

“Let us pray that he does,” Arthur groaned.

“The people are not going to like this,” Leon mumbled.

“Well, better than having a troll for a queen,” Arthur pointed out. Leon winced.

“I’m just going to go tell Geraint that Merlin’s fine and say a prayer that this all works out,” Leon muttered. Arthur nodded in dismissal and Leon left, carefully closing the door behind him.

“I should go as well,” Gaius muttered, looking oddly between her and Arthur. Merlin finally realized that she had not yet put on her tunic.

“Oh,” she murmured. Arthur looked over and grumbled under his breath at her with exasperation.

“Put on your tunic, you ridiculous idiot,” he ordered. “Just because you can’t leave the room doesn’t mean you should wander around with nothing on.” Merlin rolled her eyes as she picked up her tunic. Then she wrinkled up her nose. It stunk. Of course, she had worn it three days in a row already. And it had been on the floor with the unchanged rushes. “Oh, borrow one of mine, then,” Arthur offered. “I’ve got plenty.” Merlin dropped her trousers and tunic in with Arthur’s laundry and happily skipped over to the wardrobe. She pulled out Arthur’s smallest trousers, a pair of braies, and Arthur’s purple tunic. The braies actually fit pretty well but the tunic was obviously far too large for her and Arthur covered his mouth to stifle his laughter.

“Don’t laugh at me,” Merlin grumbled.

“You look like a child playing with a parent’s clothes,” Arthur teased. Merlin crossed her arms and pouted. At least the tunic was soft and comfortable.

“You are such a prat,” Merlin told him.

There was suddenly a knock on the door. “Arthur?” Gwen called out. Arthur pushed Merlin towards the bed and Merlin scrambled onto it while Arthur crossed the room. She hurriedly pulled the curtains around the bed shut. Arthur opened the door.

“Yes, Guinevere?” he asked. “Did you or Morgana need something?”

“Um,” Gwen squeaked. Oh, Arthur hadn’t put on a tunic either.

“Sorry for my state of undress, but I’m fending for myself,” Arthur grumbled awkwardly.

“Yes, Morgana woke early and she sent me to see if you had any chores like laundry or something that I could help you with. Has someone brought your breakfast?”

“Yes, I have breakfast.” Arthur paused, clearly deciding whether or not he wanted to accept her help. “Take the laundry. When you’re finished with it, I would appreciate it if you could change the rushes. But of course, if Morgana needs something, do that first.”

“Of course, sire,” Gwen agreed. Merlin heard her pick up the laundry basket. “I’ll take care of this right away.” The door shut again. The bolt locked.

“Morgana and Gwen are both going to know I’m here,” Merlin pointed out, climbing back out of the bed. Arthur nodded.

“Yes, and perhaps Morgana will be less upset with me today,” he agreed. “I spent most of supper yesterday with her being berated for not having better stood up for you, as you were under my protection.”

“Well, you are pardoning taxes today,” Merlin reminded him. “Morgana will like that too.”

“Yes,” Arthur nodded. “She will. Go find me something to wear.” Arthur sat back down at the table and ate some of the breakfast while Merlin picked out something that would make him look nice but also could get dusty in the Lower Town. She decided on the black jacket with the Pendragon crest on the back with a white tunic. It was Mabon today, unless Merlin had gotten dreadfully confused, and it shouldn’t be so warm that he would be uncomfortable. Arthur raised an eyebrow at her choice, but nodded.

“What?” Merlin asked.

“Am I wearing black in protest of my father wedding a troll?”

“You’re wearing this because it makes you look regal, not just wealthy, and it won’t be a horror to clean if it gets dusty. Besides, it’s got the crest on the back which reminds people that you’re the Crown Prince.”

“Most people don’t forget that I’m the Crown Prince,” Arthur teased. Merlin helped him into his clothes with minimal eye rolling and she was quite pleased with the overall effect. “Are you impressed, then?” he asked. Merlin nodded. “Well, so long as you’re impressed…”

“Oh, shut up, you prat, and go help your people,” Merlin grumbled. Arthur chuckled and left his chambers. Merlin was left alone with nothing much to do while she waited on Gwen to finish the laundry. She stacked the breakfast dishes on the tray, gathered the dirty rushes into a neat pile, and started a fire in the hearth. It was a little cool after all. But rather than Gwen being the next person to enter, it was Morgana.

“Arthur! Arthur!” Morgana was clearly in a state and Arthur was nowhere to be found. Merlin had hidden behind the door when she heard footsteps and closed it before addressing Morgana.

“I’m afraid he isn’t here,” she told her. Morgana nearly jumped out of her skin as she whirled around. Merlin winced. She hadn’t meant to frighten her.

“Merlin?” Morgana seemed shocked.

“Arthur says I’m not allowed to leave but Gaius and Leon already know I’m here and I’m sure Gwen’s seen my clothes in with Arthur’s laundry by now,” Merlin explained.

“But how long can you stay here before someone notices?” Morgana asked.

“Have you not noticed, about Catrina?”

“Oh! You mean that she’s a troll?” Morgana asked loudly, “And Uther didn’t seem to notice!” Merlin felt Arthur’s approach and hurried to get out of sight of the door again, in case someone was with him, rather than bother replying to Morgana.

“Yes, that, Morgana,” Arthur chided as he walked in. “Though how you knew I was there, I really don’t know. See, Father, Morgana is fine.”

“I’m not sure how you deem it to be fine that she insists on saying such horrible things about my wife,” Uther protested. “And I really don’t understand why you refused to collect the new taxes today. You’ve never been so soft-hearted before.”

“We weren’t condemning our people to starve, before,” Arthur declared indignantly.

“You already collect the tax that the people can bear. They have no more to give!” Morgana agreed passionately. “I don’t understand how you’ve become so convinced that the peasants are secretly wealthy.”

“Not wealthy, but better off than they pretend to be,” Uther argued. Merlin rolled her eyes. She had definitely been right about the enchanted necklace. Poor Uther simply could not see reason. On one hand, it served the man right for all the injustices he had perpetrated against his people. On the other, this was only causing them to suffer further.

“Father, I have no wish to quarrel with you but I doubt that either one of us is in a disposition to concede to the other right now,” Arthur said carefully. “Perhaps we should continue this conversation once our tempers have cooled?” Uther agreed and left. Arthur bolted the door behind him. “Oh my god, Merlin, why were you wandering around?” he breathed, grabbing her face in his hands.

“I was bored,” she explained. “Plus Morgana came to visit.”

“Do you not realize you’re a wanted fugitive?” Arthur demanded.

“Well, I suppose I owe you an apology,” Morgana admitted.

“Yes,” Arthur agreed with an arch smirk. “I’m not… what was it you called me? Oh, a heartless monster with no thought for anyone around him.”

“Morgana!” Merlin chided.

“I thought he’d abandoned you to flee through the woods,” Morgana protested, taking Merlin’s hands in hers. “I couldn’t bear the thought of it.”

“Surely you’ve noticed that Arthur’s not quite so cold-hearted as all that,” Merlin told her. “He even let me eat all the bacon!”

“Merlin, literally no one except you is excited about bacon,” Arthur grumbled. “And Morgana, would you let go of my manservant?” Morgana smirked at Arthur but she let go of Merlin’s hands and took a step back. Merlin really wasn’t sure what the fuss was about. There was a knock on the door. Arthur grabbed Merlin’s arm and pushed her towards his bed. Merlin ran over to the bed and hid behind the curtains.

“Your highness?” it was Gwen. Arthur opened the door and Morgana beckoned Merlin back out of hiding. “I brought your laundry and your dinner.”

“Thank you,” Arthur mumbled. He shut the door behind her.

“Hello!” Gwen beamed at Merlin. “I brought you your own clothes. I saw yours in with Arthur’s laundry, so I knew you had to be here. I brought enough food for two.”

“Thanks!” Merlin chirped, taking the dinner tray from Gwen. She set the tray on the table. “Just set the laundry by the wardrobe. I can put it away, at least.”

“Oh, you have to be bored to tears,” Morgana exclaimed. “Gwen, you must fetch one of my stories for Merlin to read. There’s little enough for him to do and he’ll at least be occupied.”

“Your stories are not fit for public consumption,” Arthur muttered. Gwen was blushing.

“Arthur, come eat,” Merlin ordered. “Because you’ll have to go reassure the people that you aren’t truly letting a troll take over Camelot by enchanting your father this afternoon and you shouldn’t try to do that on an empty stomach.” Arthur made a very grumpy expression, but conceded to sit down and eat.

Morgana then demanded to know why Merlin wasn’t surprised that Catrina was a troll and she had to explain how she had known days ago and she and Gaius had been trying to figure out how to get rid of her. Gwen looked around the room for something to occupy herself with, saw the pile of dirty rushes and quickly whisked them away. Merlin was quite grateful because frankly it was beginning to smell. Arthur and Morgana discussed how Uther wasn’t listening and how he hadn’t even seemed to notice when the troll’s potion had failed. Merlin pointed out that there was the possibility of Uther being enchanted and therefore being unable to notice or think about any strangeness in his new bride. Morgana looked horrified. Arthur was scrubbing his face with resignation.

“I still don’t understand how we’re supposed to make Father cry, though,” Arthur said. “Father doesn’t cry.”

“Cry?” Morgana asked.

“The victim of troll magic will be released from the spell if they cry tears of true remorse,” Merlin explained. “But Arthur’s right. Uther doesn’t cry frequently or easily. It would have to be something extreme.”

“Well, we’ll have to figure something out,” Morgana sighed. Gwen came back in with fresh rushes. “Gwen, take Arthur’s breakfast dishes down and then meet me in my chambers with my dinner.”

“Morgana,” Arthur nodded.

“See you later,” Merlin waved at Morgana and Gwen.

“Bye, Merlin,” Morgana said with a smile. Gwen took the tray of dishes and they both left. Morgana carefully closed the door behind them. Arthur and Merlin ate in silence, both musing over what they could do to make Uther cry. After dinner, Leon summoned Arthur to Uther and Merlin spread out the fresh rushes and put the clean clothes away, taking the opportunity to put her own clothes on. Arthur’s tunic was much softer than her own, but it fit strangely. She would have to do something nice for Gwen, for taking over her chores for her, maybe pick her some flowers or buy her a bracelet. For quite some time, Merlin was left alone with her thoughts, then suddenly there was a crowd of people in Arthur’s chambers. Leon, Geraint, Ewan, Galahad, Morgana, Gwen, Gaius and Geoffrey all followed Arthur into his chambers. Merlin was very glad she wasn’t wearing Arthur’s clothes anymore.

“I just don’t understand it!” Geoffrey was exclaiming. “She’s clearly a troll!”

“He’s enchanted!” Morgana was yelling back.

“What happened?” Merlin asked.

“I’ve been disinherited,” Arthur explained curtly. He flung himself on the bed. “Also, the troll has been named Father’s heir. The nobles are panicking.”

“Understandably,” Merlin murmured, sitting down next to Arthur and gently brushing his hair out of his face. “We’ll figure something out. It’ll all be fine. Your father will apologize and you’ll be Crown Prince again.” Arthur reached out and curled his fingers tightly over her hand.

“Get them out, all of them,” he begged in a whisper. Merlin nodded.

“Why are you all in the Crown Prince’s personal chambers?” she demanded haughtily. Everyone turned to stare at her. “I don’t believe any of you were invited into his highness’ chambers and unwelcome guests are not permitted.” Leon smiled at her and nodded with a short bow towards the bed. Geraint followed Leon out and Ewan and Galahad followed them. Gwen dragged Morgana out and Geoffrey stormed out, still looking just as upset.

“I’ll go figure out something to get Uther to cry,” Gaius announced. “We’ll do it as soon as I can find a solution.” Gaius left as well and closed the door behind him. Merlin went over and sat back down by Arthur.

“See? They’re gone now, it’s alright,” she murmured. Arthur let out a piteous whine and rolled over, sobbing into his blankets. Merlin rubbed his back. This had been hardest on him, probably, his father publically declaring him not good enough, even if Uther was enchanted.

“I can’t do this. I’m not strong enough. I can’t lead the kingdom.”

“No one can lead the kingdom while a King is still on the throne making decisions,” Merlin assured him. “Your father is in fine health and when he passes on, you’ll have plenty of knowledge and experience and you’ll be as good a King as you look in your armor.”

“No, I won’t,” Arthur mumbled. “I’m soft-hearted and weak.”

“Your compassion isn’t a weakness, it’s a strength,” Merlin argued. “You won’t be needlessly cruel to your people. You’ll take them into consideration when making your decisions and they’ll adore you. If you have to go to war, they will gladly fight in your name and your army will be stronger for it.”

“I wish I had your faith in me,” Arthur muttered.

“We all see it,” Merlin told him. Arthur rolled to the side and peered up at her in confusion. “Leon is a loyal knight, yes?” Arthur nodded. “And he answers to you, not your father. Did you see everyone who followed you, looking to you for reassurance and a solution? Even Morgana was here. If they thought you were weak, they wouldn’t have been following you around in hopes of an answer, they would have followed someone else.”

“I’m the Crown Prince,” Arthur grumbled. “They have to ask me first.”

“I have it on good authority that the problem that needed fixing was that you were disinherited. Did anyone look pleased at you being stripped of your rank?”

Arthur paused for a moment before he answered. “No.”

“See, they have faith in you.”

“You are too good for me,” Arthur mumbled. Merlin kindly pretended not to hear him. They sat in silence for a long moment, until one of the servants came in with a supper tray. Merlin didn’t even have time to hide, but she recognized the boy as Sir Cador’s page that had been at Lady Bertrand’s beck and call. Arthur sat up, ready to force the servant into not telling his father but the boy just winked at them and left, carefully closing the door behind himself. Merlin got up and walked over to the table. There was more than enough for both of them.

“It’s possible that everyone in the castle except your father and the troll know I’m here,” she commented. Arthur nodded wearily.

“Most of the castle does think we’re lovers, and have been so for months,” he reminded her. “They would hardly assume that I would turn you out simply because you’d been accused of stealing something by my father’s new bride.”

“I suppose that’s logical,” Merlin nodded. “Come and eat.” Arthur slowly got up and trudged over. He ate, but with no enthusiasm. It was better than when Arthur had been enchanted and Merlin had had to hand-feed him like a babe-in-arms. After they ate, another servant appeared and took the tray and then Arthur locked the door and they went to bed. Arthur had had a long and trying day and Merlin did not have the heart to make him entertain her.

“What kind of King would you want to be ruled by?” Arthur asked suddenly. Poor Arthur, this was exactly what always worried him and somehow the troll had struck upon it by accident.

“One who cares for and protects his people,” Merlin told him. “One who doesn’t care less for a border town merely because it has no lord to offer riches for its protection.” Arthur smiled briefly, just the smallest quirk of his lips.

“Not one who never wavers in his decisions? Not one who is quick to decide on a course of action and follow through?”

“No, and not one who does everything his father tells him to,” Merlin answered. “You’ll be a good king, Arthur. Maybe you won’t be exactly the same as your father, but no one is.”

“I just don’t want to let my people down,” Arthur murmured.

“And that’s why you’ll be a good King,” Merlin promised. “I wouldn’t have drunk poison for just any prat, you know.”

“I thought that was because of my good looks,” Arthur teased, clearly feeling at least temporarily reassured.

“No,” Merlin shook her head, widening her eyes dramatically. “It was dreadful. I died for a few moments. It was very upsetting. I opened my eyes to Gaius embracing Gwen. I never needed that mental image and then Gwen was kissing me and it was not a good day.”

“Gwen’s a good kisser,” Arthur said. “Couldn’t have been that bad.”

“I really don’t think she’d just been sobbing when she kissed you and then apologized.”

Arthur winced, “Uh, no.”

“Are you upset, about Lancelot courting Gwen?” Merlin asked. “You can tell me. I won’t tell anyone.”

“No, actually, I’m not,” Arthur said with a small laugh. “Nothing could have ever come of our kiss and I’m glad that she has someone to make her happy.”

“So… not still thinking about her all the time?” Merlin had been unable to forget that conversation.

“Shut up, Merlin,” Arthur grumbled, “Go to sleep.” Merlin obligingly stopped talking and let Arthur manhandle her until she was pressed against him again, half under his weight. Even though Merlin had had very little to do, she fell asleep fairly quickly and did not wake until Gaius was letting himself in a little after dawn.

“Arthur! Merlin! Wake up!” he called. Merlin shoved at Arthur.

“Wake up,” she insisted. Arthur groaned and opened his eyes slowly.

“Yes, Gaius, what is it?” he mumbled, only half coherently. Gaius babbled half coherently back about some plan about some potion that would bring Arthur to the brink of death and Uther would think his son was dead and cry and then the troll would be revealed and everything would work out. Merlin and Arthur were both a little uncertain on the details, but they got up and got dressed. Arthur got one potion bottle and Merlin had the antidote and Gaius went off to tell Uther.

“This will work, I’m sure of it,” Merlin promised.

“It had better,” Arthur grumbled. He gulped down the whole bottle and promptly fell unconscious. Merlin’s magic gently lowered him to the floor. She hid herself on the other side of the cupboard by the door, moving Arthur’s screen to provide extra cover. She had just gotten settled when Gaius returned with Uther and a troll.

Uther rushed to Arthur’s side. “My boy!” he cried out, heartbroken, pulling Arthur into his arms. “It was my fault. I pushed you away. My son. My son.”

“Come away,” the troll begged, trying to pull Uther from Arthur. “There's nothing you can do for him now.”

“I killed him. I killed my only son!” Uther was clearly sobbing in earnest.

“No, no, no, no,” the troll muttered and started to say a spell. Uther turned around and finally saw his new bride for who she truly was. 

“Catrina? What kind of trickery is this?” he asked, looking progressively more and more stricken.

“How I've suffered these last weeks. Allowing you to touch me! Having to share a bed with you!” The troll did not seem to have noticed that Uther no longer being under her thrall would not end well for her. Uther made a choked sound of disgust. “It's repulsive.”

“I know the feeling,” Uther murmured. “Guards! Seize....” he paused, wondering what to call the troll, “it!” Uther’s guards rushed to do his bidding and the troll retreated away from Arthur and Uther. Merlin came out of her hiding place in the chaos and calmly gave Arthur the antidote. His eyes opened and he unsheathed his sword, joining the guards in their attack. “What…?”

“Um, you were enchanted,” Merlin told him, keeping one eye on Arthur. This might not have been the best plan.

“I noticed,” Uther replied.

“To get you un-enchanted, you had to cry tears of true remorse. So we took Arthur to the brink of death. It was all perfectly safe.”

“We?” Uther eyed her suspiciously.

“This was all Gaius’ plan,” Merlin explained. “Arthur, the rug!” One of the guards understood her, at least. He pulled the rug the troll was standing on out from under her feet and in her unsteadiness, Arthur got in a solid blow. Jonas was also lying dead at his feet. More guards and servants were called to clean up Arthur’s chambers and dispose of the dead bodies. Uther and Arthur went to Uther’s chambers to have breakfast and Arthur dragged Merlin with him.

Uther gave an awkward statement about how he regretted many things. Arthur asked him facetiously how many nights he’d shared a bed with a troll. Merlin wisely kept her mouth shut. Uther noticed her anyway and gave her a stilted apology and assured her that none of the troll’s accusations would be given any further merit. She was given a small purse of gold for her “trouble”. Arthur looked like he might actually throttle her if she so much as mentioned the word bacon. Merlin felt rather insulted that he thought she was as careless as he was.


	6. Witchfinder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the chapter with graphic depiction of violence and torture. Continue at your own risk.

It had been a few days since Arthur had taken care of the troll and Uther was on high paranoia about magic. Apparently, he was still complacent. Merlin thought Uther was possibly heading towards madness. Morgana had begun accepting Gaius’ sleeping draughts again, just to help her calm her nerves. Merlin wanted to do the same, but she had chores to do. The three day storm that had started only an hour after the troll died did not improve anyone’s temper. The first dry day, Merlin found herself sitting down on a log, while she was supposed to be collecting firewood, exhausted and sad. Uther had rounded up everyone suspected of consorting with sorcerers and Morgana and Arthur had only just kept him from condemning them all to execution. There was smoke from a bonfire curling up through the trees and Merlin thoughtlessly played with it, curling it back and forth. It was comforting. She momentarily forgot she was in Camelot and not Ealdor and the smoke took the shape of a horse, just for a moment, not even distinctly, just the vague outline of nose and neck and hind hocks. Some lady who could apparently rival Uther for paranoia came rushing up and grabbed Merlin by the shoulder.

“The smoke! Oh dear lord, did you see the smoke?”

“Well, yes, obviously there’s smoke right there,” Merlin told her. “Are you feeling well?”

“I’ve just had a terrible fright and you ask if I’m feeling well? How did you not see the sorcery?”

“What sorcery?” Merlin asked. Was this woman seriously going to accuse her of sorcery over a vague shape in some smoke? Gaius would never let her live this down.

“There was a horse, in the smoke, a creature of fire and hell!” Merlin stared at her in complete befuddlement.

“Well, it seems to me you don’t even have your story straight,” she commented. The woman stopped feigning palpitations to stare at her. “It cannot be both sorcery and a creature of hell. Either it’s a creature of hell and therefore manifested itself or it was an illusion produced by sorcery. You can’t say it’s both or you’ll be laughed out of the kingdom.”

“Well, it was certainly no illusion,” the woman snapped.

“Well, I certainly didn’t see it,” Merlin retorted.

“Are you blind?” she demanded.

“Did anyone else besides you even see it? There’s a handful of men down there around the fire. There’s plenty more of us up here.” Both true statements. No one else had kicked up a fuss.

“It is a creature of hell and I’m telling the King!” she announced and rushed off. Merlin felt her heart stop. Someone would die for this and Merlin doubted that it would be her, who had actually been playing with the smoke. She gathered up the firewood she had collected and hurried back to the castle, straight to Morgana. Arthur would support her no matter what, but Morgana needed to be warned before Uther reacted to this woman.

Morgana went white as a sheet when Merlin told her the news, but she nodded. “Make sure Gaius brings my sleeping draught, Merlin.”

“Of course,” Merlin promised. “I just thought I should tell you so you would be a little more prepared.”

“Thank you,” Morgana waved a hand in dismissal. “Go to Arthur. Tell him as well.”

“Yes, my lady,” Merlin agreed.

Of course, Arthur had been with his father when the woman came in crying sorcery. He had tried to point out how unsubstantiated her claim was but Uther was paranoid. He had sent for a witch-finder.

“A what?” Merlin asked weakly.

“A man who gets paid when a sorcerer confesses,” Arthur sneered at the idea, “They torture their suspects and I doubt that all their confessions are from the guilty. They don’t get paid without a confession, after all, and they do have to eat.” 

“This is terrible,” Merlin whispered. Arthur just put a hand on her shoulder and smiled reassuringly.

“I won’t let anything bad happen, I swear,” Arthur promised. Merlin knew that there would be no way for him to keep that promise. Uther was paranoid and if there was a possibility that someone close to him or Arthur was using sorcery, he would want it investigated. Morgana might be safe because Uther loved her, but Merlin certainly would not share the same protection, even or perhaps especially as Arthur’s supposed lover.

After Merlin had finished all her chores, she went to warn Morgana about the witch-finder. Morgana honest to Goddess whimpered and clutched at the doorframe.

“Uther loves you and I highly doubt he would stand for you being accused, Morgana. I just wanted you to know before he showed up and you panicked.”

“Thank you, Merlin,” she murmured. “You’re such a good friend.”

“I try,” Merlin shrugged. “I’ll let you get some sleep.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Morgana agreed. She shut the door and Merlin went to warn Gaius, who of course was mostly upset that she had been playing with smoke while Uther was this paranoid. He berated her for nearly a full hour about carelessness and foolhardy behavior before he let her go to sleep.

Merlin and Morgana both spent the two days that it took the witch-finder to arrive on edge and worried, jumping at every sound. Thankfully, most people shared Arthur’s view of the man and were also concerned about his imminent arrival because he could really accuse anyone and after a while death looked infinitely preferable to torture. So no one really seemed to notice that Morgana turned pale with dread whenever the man was brought up in her earshot, nor did they notice Merlin suddenly developing a fear of doors slamming open. Merlin was a little worried that the man would have some way of finding the actual culprit, which was her, and that she would end up tortured. She was more worried that he would not and someone else would be tortured for her crime.

The first morning that the Witch Finder, Aredian, Gaius had called him, was in Camelot, Merlin was summoned to speak with him as a supposed witness. She was completely terrified but she was also far more powerful than Aredian, who had no magic. If necessary, she could save herself.

“You are aware, then, that sorcery has been practiced in the vicinity of Camelot?” Aredian demanded.

“Yes. I mean... how could I not notice a troll on the throne that got me fired and accused of a crime I did not commit?” Merlin replied. She would not hang herself. Aredian did not like that response at all.

“I meant the matter of the smoke,” he snapped.

“Oh, that,” Merlin nodded, “Yes, I know that a woman claims to have witnessed sorcery because she thought she saw a creature in the smoke.” Aredian glared at her.

“No, no, it cannot be denied. There was a witness.”

“Yes, I know,” Merlin replied.

“Do you also know that the woman has named you as a witness?” he asked, not quite succeeding at hiding his smirk. Merlin shook her head and said nothing. “I've already spoken to her. She was quite clear on the matter.”

“But I wasn't a witness,” Merlin told him.

“Oh, sorry. Perhaps I misheard. Do you deny that you were present at the time of the incident?” He thought he had her. He did not.

“Being present and witnessing whatever horrible creature that caused the woman to fear for her life are two very different things, sir,” Merlin told him.

“So you saw it, the horse conjured from the smoke?”

“I saw the smoke, but...it was only smoke. I saw nothing else. Was it only a horse? And that caused her to fear for her life? How interesting.”

“Are you saying that she lies?” Aredian asked.

“I didn't say that. I said I didn't see what she saw.”

“Hmm. Well, how can that be, I wonder? How can one person see something and the other not?”

“Perhaps she was ill, or had eaten a mushroom that wasn’t edible. She was out in the woods, after all. Or perhaps the smoke merely appeared like a horse from the angle she was at but not from mine, like people thinking they see pictures in clouds. All utter nonsense, of course, but then Uther usually hasn’t been enchanted into marrying a troll.”

“Well, I'm at a loss as to explain it myself. Unless it was you who performed the magic.”

“It wasn't,” Merlin stated firmly.

“Can you prove that it wasn't?” Aredian asked.

“How exactly would I prove that I didn’t do something three days ago, may I ask?” Merlin countered.

“Hmm. That'll be all,” Aredian dismissed her. Merlin rose and started to leave. “For now,” he added rudely. Merlin stifled the urge to tell him off, as it probably would only make things worse. Aredian questioned half the castle staff and a few of the peasants in the lower town throughout the day. Everyone was wandering around looking shocked and dismayed. Merlin had no doubt that Aredian was trying to see who he would get away with accusing, and possibly also planting evidence as he travelled over the entire castle.

The next morning, Merlin found herself in Uther’s council as three terrified women gave accounts of inexplicable sorcery. They clearly believed their stories, but Merlin did not understand how a sorcerer would be blamed for a goblin, when everyone knew that they answered to no one, nor why anyone would believe someone would be stupid enough to conjure toads from their mouth, especially with a witch finder arriving, nor why anyone who had not drowned someone would see drowned people in still water. The stories made no sense. Poor Morgana was beside herself with terror, pale and clutching onto the arms of her chair.

“I can scarcely believe it,” Uther murmured. Merlin wished that he would hold onto that thought. These women had clearly seen frightening visions but Uther should know that it didn’t make them real.

“Yet it is the truth, My Lord. Fortunately I've utilized every facet of my craft to bring this matter to a swift resolution.”

“The sorcerer? You have a suspect?” Uther asked. 

“Oh, I do, My Lord. I regret to say, they stand among us in this very room. My methods are infallible, my findings incontestable!” Morgana shrank into her seat. “The facts point to one person and one person alone: the boy, Merlin!” Complete silence followed the pronouncement.

“Merlin?” Arthur scoffed. “You can't be serious.”

“This is outrageous! You have no evidence!” Gaius exclaimed.

Aredian just grinned unrepentantly at him. “The tools of magic cannot be hidden from me. I am certain that a thorough search of the boy's chamber will deliver us all we need.”  
“Merlin?” Uther asked.

“I have nothing to hide from him,” Merlin replied. Her only magic book was tucked in the box she had gotten as a present from Aulfric and Arwen, just as it had been for months, and Aredian certainly would not see anything more than a lock of Gwen’s hair, a lock of Morgana’s hair, a pressed wildflower with no magical value, and some gold.

“Very well,” Uther nodded. “Guards, restrain the boy. Let the search begin.”

Aredian strutted out of the room while Merlin was gently handcuffed and led down to the dungeons. She worried that he had planted some evidence somehow. She and Gaius were not always in the room, she supposed.

“I’m sure Arthur will get this cleared right up, Merlin,” one of the guards assured her.

“Terribly sorry, but King’s orders,” the other said. Merlin just shrugged absently at them. There should not be anything to find. Of course, there was. Arthur followed Aredian down to the dungeons, screaming protests. Morgana was shouting as well. Uther was trying to speak over them and failing. Aredian just smirked and tossed the bracelet into the cell with her.

“What is that?” Merlin asked.

“Your amulet of enchantment,” Aredian replied mildly.

“I don’t own anything of enchantment and I’ve never seen that bracelet before in my life,” Merlin told Uther.

“See?” Arthur demanded. “Merlin is not a sorcerer. Wouldn’t I be enchanted if Merlin was a sorcerer? Wouldn’t I be dead twice over? A sorcerer would have either turned me into some sort of puppet or killed me long since and been done with it.”

“Merlin’s too kind!” Morgana protested. “He can’t be a sorcerer, Uther! See reason! He would never hurt anyone!”

“I am not a sorcerer,” Merlin concurred. She was a witch, but that was not the same thing. She would not deny her own Talent.

“Then you will not object to Aredian’s tests?” Uther replied. Merlin felt the blood drain out of her face.

“Not Merlin, Father,” Arthur whispered. He looked every inch the tormented lover at the thought of her being hurt. It was impressive.

“Please, Uther, this is madness,” Morgana begged.

“It will be the only way to rid your mind of doubt, Sire,” Aredian hissed. Arthur turned and one of the guards grabbed his raised arm. Oh, it was Leon. That explained it.

“Sire, your temper,” he warned.

“Arthur, I’ll be fine,” Merlin promised. She would heal eventually. She was young and strong and her magic would keep her. Besides, she had been playing with the smoke. Arthur looked helplessly at her.

“I will never forgive you if anything happens to him,” Arthur snarled at Uther and stormed out of the dungeons.

“Nor will I,” Morgana warned. “You promised to heed my counsel the last time you condemned an innocent man. I have not forgotten that.” Morgana turned on her heel and followed Arthur out of the dungeons, Gwen trotting after her with her mouth hanging open.

“Permission to speak?” Leon asked quietly. Uther nodded. “We have both seen your son enchanted. He behaves nothing like that with Merlin. And Merlin has drunk poison for Arthur, rode into battle with him, and if Morgana’s to be believed, Merlin is the only reason that King Bayard respects Arthur. Those are not the actions of a sorcerer, Sire.”

“You are young, Leon,” Uther said with a sigh. “I admire your loyalty to Arthur and by extension to Merlin. But you have only lived in a Camelot free of magic. You do not know how it was before the Purge. Sorcerers lived freely here and they were more subtle in their machinations, gaining political power to influence the ruling of kingdoms. Before the Purge, half my noblemen used magic. I myself had not yet discovered the insidious nature of sorcery and had a Court Sorcerer. It took a great betrayal for me to see how slowly sorcery can achieve its ends, and I can only wish that I had not lost so many to its power. Though I agree it is unusual now for sorcerers to choose such slow methods nowadays, Merlin must be subjected to the same treatment as anyone else. He is, after all, so close to my only son and heir. I cannot have doubts.”

“Yes, Sire,” Leon bowed and took his leave.

“Leon, tell Geraint I’m sorry I didn’t get the mending done on your tunic,” Merlin called out. “I promised him yesterday that I’d do it and I’m afraid I haven’t.” Leon turned back to her, stricken.

“He will not be angry with you, Merlin,” Leon choked out. “But I will tell him.” Leon fled the dungeons.

“Geraint really has no idea how to use a needle and thread,” Merlin whispered conspiratorially to Uther, who shuddered and rushed off. “Think he’s feeling guilty?” she asked Aredian.

“Well, let’s see if you are,” Aredian replied. “I’ll give you some time to think it over before I return.” Merlin just stared him down as he left. She would not yet give him the satisfaction. She watched the sun rise to its zenith and sink before Aredian returned. No one brought her any food or water. She was starving and thirsty and this was going to be horrible. She was trying not to cry to conserve water, but she was huddled up in the corner, arms wrapped around her knees, pretending that she was shivering from the cold. Aredian came back just after sunset and had her brought to another room and her handcuffs were hooked to the ceiling. Her arms were painfully stretched above her head.

“Are you a sorcerer?”

“No.”

“Did you conjure the horse in the smoke?”

“No.”

“Is this your amulet?”

“No.”

“Did you bring frogs from your mouth?”

“No.”

“Did you conjure the goblin in the fire?”

“No.”

“Did you put the faces in the well?”

“No.” Aredian left and Merlin was left standing on tiptoe, attached to the ceiling for who knew how long before he returned. She was dazed and incoherent from a lack of food and water and the ever-present pain. A bucket of icy water was thrown in her face and Merlin spluttered and struggled to catch her breath in its wake.

“Are you a sorcerer?”

“No.”

“Did you conjure the horse in the smoke?”

“No.”

“Is this your amulet?”

“No.”

“Did you bring frogs from your mouth?”

“No.”

“Did you conjure the goblin in the fire?”

“No.”

“Did you put the faces in the well?”

“No.” Merlin was left to hang from the ceiling all night, without food or water, other than that which she was roused with the few times Aredian returned to ask the same questions. The next morning, he brought instruments of torture and Merlin whined just at the sight of them. She was poked and prodded and pinched the first time, short bursts of pain that only left mild bruises.

“Are you a sorcerer?”

“No.” She was pinched with some iron tool.

“Did you conjure the horse in the smoke?”

“No.” She was poked with something sharper than a dagger.

“Is this your amulet?”

“No.” She was prodded enough to make her lose her balance and sway painfully on her tiptoes.

“Did you bring frogs from your mouth?”

“No.” The not-dagger again.

“Did you conjure the goblin in the fire?”

“No.” Another pinch.

“Did you put the faces in the well?”

“No.”

“You are a liar,” Aredian insisted. He poked her with the not-dagger again, in the thin skin over her collarbone. She bled.

“I am not a sorcerer,” Merlin told him. Aredian left. Time passed. Aredian was back. He pulled something out of the fire.

“Are you a sorcerer?”

“No.” It was a poker. Merlin screamed, white hot pain in her stomach.

“Did you conjure the horse in the smoke?”

“No.” Pain again. She screamed, voice already shredded.

“Is this your amulet?”

“No.” Merlin screamed.

“Did you bring frogs from your mouth?”

“No.” Merlin screamed.

“Did you conjure the goblin in the fire?”

“No.” Merlin screamed.

“Did you put the faces in the well?”

“No.” Merlin screamed.

“You're a traitor! You're an impostor!” Aredian put down the poker. Merlin stared at him. “Sorcery is your only master.”

“I serve only my King and my Prince,” Merlin whispered. It hurt to talk but Aredian wanted a response.

“Ha! In what way have you served him? You've lied to him. You've broken his laws. You've betrayed his trust.” Her stomach throbbed with pain, but these accusations could not be borne.

“I've saved his life. I've protected his ward. I've protected his only son.”

“You've protected his ward?” Aredian asked sharply. She didn’t know why.

“She is my friend. I have tried to keep her safe when there is danger.”

“The Lady Morgana?” he asked incredulously. Merlin nodded, too bone-tired to even speak. “She is your friend?”

“She is kind to me,” Merlin managed to say.

“Is she not kind to everyone?”

“Yes,” Merlin nodded. Aredian left. He returned more quickly than before. Or perhaps he did not. She had no idea of the passage of time, only the throbbing of pain in her stomach. Her arms had thankfully long since gone numb.

“Are you ready to confess?” Aredian asked.

“Never,” Merlin muttered.

“Good,” Aredian grinned. “But die you shall. And you will have company.”

“What?” Merlin asked.

“The Lady Morgana will join you in the flames. You and your friend will burn together.”

“Uther would never agree to that. He loves Morgana,” Merlin protested.

“Ah, but your sorcery has tainted her,” Aredian taunted. “He has condemned her to death. You would not let her die alone for your crimes, would you? You say she is your friend, sorcerer.”

“No, this is a trick,” Merlin murmured. “Uther would never agree to that.”

“But he has,” Aredian whispered.

“He has not. I shall not confess to lies.” Aredian slapped her and left. Merlin’s stomach throbbed with pain. It did not lessen. She was nearly insensible with it when Aredian returned, sobbing and screaming silently.

“Are you a sorcerer?”

“No.” Merlin shook her head.

“Did you conjure the horse in the smoke?”

“No.”

“Is this your amulet?”

“No.” Oh, it hurt!

“Did you bring frogs from your mouth?”

“No.”

“Did you conjure the goblin in the fire?”

“No.”

“Did you put the faces in the well?”

“No.” Aredian ripped her tunic in half and pressed incomprehensible pain to her chest. Merlin’s mouth opened in a silent scream and she felt her magic rush out of her, down into the ground and outwards in a silent plea for succor. Aredian left. Merlin was carried back into the dungeons and laid down on the ground.

“Oh, Merlin,” someone whispered. “Arthur is wearing Uther down. Just hold on a little longer. Stay strong.”

“Come on, before we get in trouble,” someone else grumbled.

There was water. Merlin could not even move from the pain. Blessed darkness overcame her. She woke to more pain. Her fingers were being stabbed by thousands of tiny needles.  
There was more water. She couldn’t breathe.

“Confess!”

“Do not confess, you are not a sorcerer,” a voice told her. It was a good voice.

“I am not a sorcerer,” Merlin obediently repeated. There was silence and pain, always pain. Her arms. Her fingers. Her chest. Her stomach. Her head. She was moved. It was excruciating. Then blinding. She couldn’t see.

“Merlin, how do you plead in regards to being accused of sorcery?” She knew that voice.

“I am not a sorcerer,” she answered.

“He would not confess,” someone said unhappily.

“Leon, Ewan, carry Merlin to my room!” Arthur. That was Arthur. “Gaius, get something to treat those wounds. They look like burns.”

“And infected ones, at that.” Footsteps everywhere. Merlin could not move.

“Arthur, we weren’t allowed to take Merlin food or water. Shall I fetch him something from the kitchens?”

“Obviously. Fetch lots of water and soup or something I can hand-feed him. He’s in no shape to feed himself. Father, how could you condone this?”

“I’ll help!” Did she know that voice?

“As will I. Merlin has done nothing to deserve being tortured like this. And deprived of water!” She knew that voice, didn’t she?

“Merlin, it’s Leon,” he said. “Ewan and I are going to pick you up. I’m sorry. It might hurt.”

“Everything pain,” Merlin whispered back. “I’m not a sorcerer.”

“Oh, Merlin,” someone said softly. She was jostled as someone touched her and she succumbed to the welcome darkness again.

The next time she woke, Merlin was in a soft bed with cool sheets. There was a light pressure on her stomach and chest. There was a dull ache in her shoulders but nothing hurt. She could hear rain on glass.

“Gwen, fetch Arthur from council, Merlin’s blinking!” someone exclaimed. Merlin opened her eyes. Morgana. This was Morgana.

“Morgana,” she whispered. Her throat was sore.

“Drink, please,” Morgana asked, holding up a goblet. Merlin nodded. Morgana wouldn’t hurt her. Morgana helped her hold her head up and tilted the goblet against her lips. It was water, cool blessed relief.

“Said pyre,” Merlin murmured. “Safe?”

“Yes, Merlin,” Morgana nodded, tears in her eyes. “You’re safe.” Merlin shook her head.

“You safe?”

“Yes, Merlin,” tears fell down her cheeks. “I’m safe too. Aredian is gone. Arthur ordered him from the kingdom.”

“Arthur,” Merlin whispered. She tried to smile.

“Oh, Merlin, you do love him, don’t you? I had hoped you didn’t,” Morgana murmured. “You poor thing.”

“Merlin!” Arthur cried out, running across the room and falling to his knees beside the bed. “You’re awake?”

“Prat,” Merlin whispered. Arthur looked like he might cry. His lip wobbled and his eyes were glistening. “Bacon?”

“Only you, Merlin,” Arthur murmured.

“Where’s Gwen?”

“With Gaius, helping him carry his things,” Arthur explained. “He wants to examine Merlin now that he’s awake.”

“Sleep?”

“It’s Thursday, Merlin,” Arthur told her. “You refused to confess on Tuesday and fainted in the council chambers. You haven’t woken in two days.”

“Sorry,” Merlin whispered.

“Don’t you dare apologize,” Arthur snapped. “I told you that nothing bad would happen. You’re mine to protect. I owe you a thousand apologies without your forgiveness.”

“Not your fault,” Merlin told him quietly.

“Arthur, I’m sorry, but you’re in the way again,” Gaius said mildly.

“Here, I’ll move, one of you take my seat,” Morgana offered. Arthur took the seat when Gaius waved at him. Morgana moved back and stood beside Gwen.

“Are you in any pain, my boy?” Gaius asked.

“Throat sore, arms ache,” Merlin answered. “Not bad.”

“Good. I’ve been giving you a potion to help numb the pain. Your wounds have been healing. The sleep was good to you and helped you rid yourself of the infections. Do you know what Aredian did?”

Merlin shook her head, “Pain.”

“I suspected as much. You were poked with a hot fire poker in your stomach. There were several marks and all of them were infected. I’ve cleared them up but they are still healing. Aredian branded you with the Pendragon crest on your chest. It was trying to get infected, but thankfully had not, and is therefore healing faster than your stomach, but I believe it will leave a permanent scar.”

“See?” Merlin asked. Gaius nodded.

“Arthur, lift Merlin up for me so I can take off the bandages. They need changing anyway.” Arthur gently wormed his arm under her back and lifted her off the bed. Merlin groaned softly. Gaius quickly unwrapped the bandages. “Alright.” Arthur set her back down. Merlin peered down at her chest. There was a small dragon on her chest, centered, skin pinked and raised. It really could have been worse.

“Not bad,” Merlin murmured. Arthur made a choked sound. Morgana had glided back over to the bedside.

“No, Merlin’s right,” she agreed. “It could be much worse. Hopefully it will heal nicely and he’ll look dashing.” Merlin smiled up at Morgana. That had been exactly what she was thinking. And it was at least under her tunic, not something that everyone would see and she would have to explain. Gaius cleaned the burns and put fresh herbs and clean bandages on, with Arthur’s help. Morgana kissed her forehead before she let Gwen lead her away to get something to eat.

“Arthur?” Leon asked. “Geraint wants to see Merlin if he’s still awake.”

“Yeah, come on in,” Arthur said agreeably. “Merlin’s throat is sore, but he’ll try to say hello.” Geraint and Leon appeared at the side of the bed.

“Hey, you really scared us,” Geraint said teasingly. “You feeling any better?” Merlin nodded. They both smiled.

“Good,” Leon smiled back. “I was worried that if you were down in the dungeons any longer that Arthur was going to put a sword to the King’s neck to get you back.”

“Arthur?” Merlin asked. Had he really been that crazed? Arthur blushed faintly, his cheeks and ears turning a light pink.

“I promised you that everything would be fine,” he mumbled. “And it wasn’t. You got hurt.”

“Told you,” Merlin paused to rest her throat, “Fine.”

“Merlin, you are clearly not fine!” Geraint exclaimed. “You were unconscious for two days. I thought the King was going to have a fit when you fainted. Morgana called him all sorts of hideous names and Arthur ordered Aredian from the kingdom and really, you missed all the excitement.”

“Dragon,” Merlin gestured vaguely at her chest.

“You’re right,” Leon agreed. “You had plenty of excitement. And we should let you rest.” Geraint pouted but said goodbye and they both left, right as a servant was coming in with a tray of food.

“I brought soup for Merlin,” the girl said.

“Thank you,” Arthur replied. “He wants some bacon, do you think you could find a piece that won’t be too hard for him to swallow?”

“Of course, your highness,” the girl agreed, bobbed a curtsey, and hurried off. Merlin smiled at Arthur. Arthur helped her sit up and drink one of Gaius’ potions before he helped her eat the soup. Arthur held the bowl in one hand and steadied the spoon she was holding with the other.

“Careful,” Arthur murmured every few moments. Merlin managed to get down about half the bowl before her stomach felt overfull and bloated.

“No more,” she murmured.

“You did good,” Arthur assured her. “Gaius said it would take time for you to get used to eating again. Morgana and I have been pouring a little broth down your throat for the past couple days, Gaius said it was important.” Merlin nodded absently. She was tired. “You want to lay back down?” She nodded again. Arthur helped her settle back down on the bed and then curled up behind her, arms carefully embracing her. Merlin fell quickly asleep.

“Arthur?” Gwen’s voice woke her. “I come bearing bacon for Merlin.”

“Bacon?” Merlin asked, as well as she could. Her voice rasped. “Water?” Gwen rushed in and sat the plate with bacon on it and grabbed up the goblet of water. Arthur was sleeping soundly at Merlin’s side and even Gwen reaching over him to help Merlin drink some water didn’t wake him.

“You weren’t wanting water for long, were you?” Gwen asked worriedly. “You can just wake him up, you know.”

“You woke me,” Merlin said quietly. “Voice hurt.”

“Good, well not good that your voice hurt, but good that you weren’t in pain for long,” Gwen babbled. “Did you want the bacon now?”

“Please,” Merlin asked. Arthur finally stirred.

“Whassa?” he mumbled.

“I brought Merlin some bacon, Arthur,” Gwen explained. Arthur blinked slowly up at her before he nodded.

“I can feed him. Go take care of Morgana.”

“Yes, your highness,” Gwen agreed. She waved at Merlin who weakly waved back and then left. Arthur slowly sat up and then picked up the plate of bacon. He cut it into tiny pieces before slowly hand-feeding them to her. Merlin had this feeling that if she was not so exhausted and dazed that she would have really appreciated Arthur putting tiny pieces of bacon on her tongue every time she opened her mouth. As it was, she ate probably less than half and fell asleep between one bite and the next.

Over the next few days, Merlin slowly regained her strength. The rain storm blew off. She discovered that Morgana and Gwen had found out that Aredian sold a too-strong tincture of belladonna for eye drops, which caused hallucinations, to the three women who had testified to sorcery right before Merlin had been accused. The first woman was suspected to have done something similar with her own eye drops which were at the appropriate strength. Apparently that had allowed Uther the peace of mind to sit back and do nothing when Arthur ordered Aredian from the kingdom into exile unto death. Though Merlin was feeling better, enough to be bored and restless, Arthur didn’t let her do any strenuous chores. But he, or one of the other knights who often popped in to visit, would help her into a chair and then she could polish his boots or belt or armor or mend his clothing. Various chambermaids tended to the fire and changed the rushes and did the laundry. Gaius showed up whenever he was free, to check on her and change the bandages. Morgana and Gwen would sometimes visit, frequently at meal times, and they would both fuss over her. Morgana actually lent Merlin one of her stories and Merlin quickly discovered why Arthur had been scandalized. They were quite salacious. 

On Monday, Arthur finally let Merlin do most of her chores. All her wounds were mainly healed. Gaius thought that it was possible that the scars on her stomach would eventually heal, though they had not yet. She was tired by the end of the day, but convinced Gaius that they had to go down to thank the dragon, because he had told her what to say when she was nearly out of her mind. Gaius hovered nervously as they made their way down to the dragon’s cave, but Merlin managed to get there under her own power. The dragon was already on his perch when they arrived.

“There you are, young warlock,” the dragon said in greeting. “Are you feeling better?”

“Yes,” Merlin nodded. “Just recuperating now. Thank you for your assistance.”

“Of course. I couldn’t abandon kin.” The dragon glared at Gaius. Merlin ignored the pointed jab.

“I truly don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t told me what to say,” she told him.

“I felt your distress, young one. I am only sorry I could not do more for you.”

“As was Arthur,” Merlin replied. The dragon nodded approvingly. “But I was the one who was playing with the smoke.”

“Playing with smoke is hardly a criminal offense, much less one worthy of torture,” the dragon rumbled, puffing up angrily and then settling back down.

“Merlin, you should get to bed,” Gaius suggested. He was eyeing the dragon nervously.

“Go get your rest, young warlock. Recover quickly.” The dragon flew off with the last word. Merlin was worn out and Gaius had to heavily support her back up all the stairs to his chambers. She was very much looking forward to falling into her bed and sleeping until morning. But when they arrived in Gaius’ chambers, Arthur was waiting on them.

“Where were you?” he demanded.

“We went to tell the dragon I was alright,” Merlin explained. Gaius spluttered. Oh, had she not told him that Arthur knew about the dragon?

“I would have taken you,” Arthur chided. Gaius was gawking at both of them. “Now, come on, we’re going back to my chambers.”

“Can’t someone else do it?” Gaius thought Arthur wanted her to do chores.

“Not for a chore,” Arthur corrected irritably. “He’s not well enough yet to be subjected to that horrid straw cot.” Gaius nodded sheepishly.

“I’m too tired. It’s too far,” Merlin protested.

“Then I’ll carry you,” Arthur replied easily. Merlin conceded. He swung her up into his arms and strode out of Gaius’ chambers. Arthur carried her without seeming to exert himself and answered everyone who called out in concern about her welfare. She was just tired, after all. Merlin was almost asleep by the time they got to Arthur’s chambers. A serving maid was banking the fire. She looked up at them and gasped, rushing out. Arthur chuckled. The door slammed shut behind them.

“Did you know she needed to rush out?” Merlin asked wryly. Arthur set her gently on the bed.

“Apparently you’ve recovered enough for strenuous activity. Who knew?” Arthur answered. Merlin rolled her eyes. Arthur helped her out of her boots and clothes and managed to undress himself without incident. Merlin was almost impressed when she looked up from wriggling under the covers to find him successfully already down to his small clothes. Arthur snuggled up with her under the blankets, wrapping his arm around her waist.

“Good night,” she murmured.

“Night, Merlin,” Arthur echoed.

“Merlin!” someone called quietly. There was a light rapping sound on the door. She opened her eyes to find that it was morning. The reason the morning sunlight had not woken her was that another rain storm was overhead. Merlin wriggled out of Arthur’s grasp, crawled out of the bed, pulled her tunic on to cover up her scars, and padded over to open the door. There was a small page she didn’t recognize, about fourteen, staring up at her with wide eyes. Merlin sighed.

“Could you hear the bed moving?” she asked. His face scrunched up in confusion even as he shook his head. “Was anyone gasping or moaning or screaming?” He shook his head again. “Then why could you not come in?”

“Well, what if the Crown Prince was naked?” Oh my Goddess.

“Alright, did you need something?”

“Um, yes, I was sent to see if you were awake and going to fetch the Crown Prince’s breakfast or if someone needed to bring it up for you.”

“Well, I’m awake now. I’ll go fetch it,” Merlin grumbled. “Go tell whoever I can manage to carry a tray.” The page scurried off and Merlin stomped back across the room and pulled on her trousers. Arthur was watching her with a fondly amused expression.

“I take it you weren’t amused?” he asked.

“No,” Merlin shook her head. “I had to get out of bed so he could ask me if someone needed to bring breakfast? If the chambermaid hadn’t rushed out with her assumptions last night, she could have asked. Besides, the boy was fourteen or fifteen, plenty old enough to know when not to open a door and when it should be safe.”

“Go get our breakfast,” Arthur ordered, rolling his eyes. Merlin stuffed her feet in her boots and stuck her tongue out at him before going down to the kitchens to get their food. Of course, no one wanted to let her carry the tray of food up the stairs. Merlin grumbled at all of them and snatched the tray out of Awena’s hands and made her way back upstairs.

Uther was talking quietly with Arthur when she returned. Merlin was very glad she had gone to fetch breakfast. Both of them turning to stare at her was unnerving enough. There was a strange silence as she put the tray of food down on the table.

“I will not interrupt your breakfast,” Uther finally said. “I’ll see you later in council, Arthur.”

“Father,” Arthur said warningly.

“I cannot…” Uther sighed and conceded to whatever it was Arthur wanted. “Merlin, I must apologize for what you went through at Aredian’s hands, as I was the one who asked him to come in. I have arranged with the Steward for you to have compensation for your injuries.”

“He was almost dead,” Arthur snapped angrily. Uther closed his eyes and probably counted to ten in his head.

“Thank you, Sire. I accept your apology. You really don’t need to give me compensation…”

“Oh, yes he does,” Arthur snarled.

“I understand that you were just trying to protect your only son and heir, as his safety has to be paramount in your concerns.”

“Thank you for understanding, but I must insist on the compensation.”

“I will not argue with my King,” Merlin replied. Uther eyed her suspiciously, probably suspecting that she meant she would not argue with Arthur. He did not say anything on the matter though, merely nodding in acknowledgment and taking his leave.

“I cannot believe you accepted his apology and told him you understood,” Arthur grumbled, throwing himself into a chair. “You were almost dead and had untreated wounds that had gotten infected and then you didn’t wake up for two days. How can that be understood?”

“Because he was worried about you,” Merlin explained. “Eat your breakfast, Arthur. You have to sit through council and it will be worse on an empty stomach.” Arthur grumpily shoveled food into his mouth. She got to do all her chores that day and that night, Arthur let her go back to her own room to sleep. It seemed that he had decided that she was well enough recovered for them to go back to normal.


	7. Morgause and Ygraine

It was the next Monday before any new danger came to Camelot. The rain had finally cleared off on Sunday, after all, so clearly it was time. Arthur was happily watching his father knight Caradoc and Vidor, who he thought showed worthy promise. Uther was babbling on about nobility and honor and even praising Arthur for those virtues. Merlin was watching Lancelot quietly flirt with Gwen. Morgana was watching them too, a small pleased smile on her lips. Lancelot, as a knight, would be a very smart match for Gwen. They would never have to worry about whether their needs would be met, and heaven forbid anything happen to her, Merlin knew that the castle took care of the fallen knights’ widows. Of course, it had been almost two full weeks since Aredian had left, and trouble was long overdue, even if Merlin had been recuperating.

Suddenly, a knight in full armor and no identifying tunic burst into the banquet hall. Merlin felt the magic radiating from the lady-knight and started to edge closer to Arthur. Thankfully, all the witch did was throw down her gauntlet at Arthur’s feet. Merlin nearly protested aloud as Arthur picked it up.

“I accept your challenge,” Arthur announced, voice carrying across the room. “If I'm to face you in combat, do me the courtesy of revealing your identity.” The witch took off her helmet and pretty blonde locks cascaded down. She was certainly a beauty.

“My name is Morgause,” she said. Merlin had the feeling that she knew that name, but she could not remember where from. Of course, everyone else was in a frenzy because she was a woman.

Uther was insistent that Arthur should not face her in combat. Merlin wondered if he knew why the name was familiar. The woman appeared to be older than Arthur, though Merlin knew that hard living and constant cares could age a person early, which meant it was possible Uther would recognize the name as someone who survived the Purge. Geoffrey said that the challenge was perfectly valid, because there was no reason that a woman should not be a knight if she chose. Arthur said he must uphold the knight’s code because he was a knight, not just a prince. Uther was distressed but did not give further argument.

That evening, after everyone had retired, Arthur asked Merlin to go ask Morgause to withdraw, as he had never met her before and had no quarrel with her and he himself could not withdraw because of his political position. Merlin rolled her eyes at him but went to Morgause’s guest chamber to speak to her.

“Morgause?” she called out. She was immediately held at swordpoint.

“What do you want?” the witch demanded.

“Well, Arthur’s asked me to ask you to withdraw, because he has no quarrel with you.”

“I will not withdraw.”

“I rather assumed that,” Merlin muttered. Now for her own interests, “I grew up in Ealdor. Why do I know your name?”

“I was raised by the High Priestesses as a Bendruy,” she explained curtly.

“Thank you, my lady, it was bothering me,” Merlin replied. Morgause nodded. “I should warn you that you better have a quick escape plan ready if you’re planning to use magic tomorrow. Uther’s been extremely paranoid about magic lately.”

“I don’t need to,” Morgause smirked. “I know how to use my sword.”

“Just a friendly advice,” Merlin murmured. “I’ll take my leave.”

“Good night,” Morgause said. Merlin quickly walked out of the chambers and hurried back to warn Arthur had Morgause had refused to withdraw. Arthur, understandably, was very upset about the whole thing. Merlin just went back to her room and got some sleep.

The next day, Arthur was very distressed about the whole situation. He did not want to have a knight’s duel against a woman. He was worried that he would have to kill her. He was worried that he would hesitate and then she would kill him, leaving Camelot without an heir. Merlin managed to stuff breakfast into his mouth and put him into his armor, but Arthur was worrying himself sick.

“Arthur, she made the challenge, not you. You asked her to withdraw and she refused. Anything that happens to her is her own choice. Just fight the way you always do and you’ll be fine.”

“But she’s a woman! This is to the death! It’s not like sparring, Merlin!”

“She is a knight, the same as you are,” Merlin told him. She was not certain that it was true, but Morgause certainly knew her way around a sword, if the dead guards she had left in her wake was any indication.

“I cannot do this,” Arthur murmured.

“Well, you don’t have a choice,” Merlin sighed. “So accept that and just win the fight.” Arthur really did not want to accept the situation. Finally it was time for the duel and Merlin got to shoo him out onto the field. Now that Arthur was no longer in hearing distance, and therefore could not accuse her of hypocrisy, Merlin started praying.

Uther started the duel. Morgause was talented with the sword. Arthur was better, but he still had not quite resigned himself to the possibility of killing a woman. He hesitated just a little and when he disarmed the priestess, he let her pick her sword back up. Merlin swore she saw Uther curse at the chivalry, which had no place in a fight to the death. Morgause, like anyone with even half a brain, took advantage of Arthur’s indecision. Soon he was on the ground, sword hand flung out to catch himself, Morgause’s sword point resting on his chest. Merlin was not sure that it was actually a death blow, and Uther seemed to agree with her that the sword probably wouldn’t go through the tunic, the chainmail, the gambeson, and the shirt. It would get stuck somewhere. Unfortunately, Arthur seemed to be in agreement with Morgause. Thankfully, she was apparently not trying to murder him in that duel, because she said something to him, Arthur replied and then she was granting him mercy. Uther looked entirely too relieved.

After the battle, Gaius examined Arthur, who thankfully had no wounds. His armor had protected him. Then Gaius examined Morgause, who had a cut on her upper arm. Thankfully for her sake, it was not deep or threatening infection. Gaius put some healing herbs on it, bound it with a clean bandage and asked her if she had visited Camelot in the past. Morgause said she had been only a baby and it had been a brief visit. Merlin suspected the Bendruy had brought her to be blessed by Lady Vivienne, who probably still lived at court when Morgause was small.

When Merlin got to Arthur’s chambers, he was horrified at himself, slumped over the table, sulking about losing to a girl.

“It could’ve been worse,” Merlin told him while she straightened up his chambers. Clearly he had had one of his tantrums. Half the wardrobe was on the rushes and of course they were near where he had tipped over the chamber pot.

“How could it have been worse?” Arthur moaned piteously.

“You could be the one that has to clean up the mess when you throw a tantrum and knock over the chamber pot.” Arthur glared at her sharply. “Or you could be dead. She could have decided to kill you.”

“At least then I wouldn’t have to face anyone. I’ve never felt so humiliated. I was defeated by a girl!”

“She said she was raised by the Bendruy, so if it feels better it would be more accurate to say you were beaten by a priestess of the Goddess.”

“She wasn’t using magic to cheat. It doesn’t feel better,” Arthur mumbled. “Though I suppose that explains why she challenged me. She granted me my life if I would come to her and accept whatever challenge she gives me.”

“I wonder what she wants,” Merlin thought aloud. Arthur shrugged.

“Hopefully not my death,” he muttered.

“Well, I’ll be going with you,” Merlin told him. Arthur gave her a look. “Don’t even try to argue. I am from Ealdor and it’s still a stronghold of the Goddess. She’ll be less likely to hurt me than you.”

“But wouldn’t you be a traitor or something? Protecting me?”

“We’ll deal with that if we have to. But if she didn’t want your immediate death, then maybe she won’t be deaf to reason.”

“Hopefully,” Arthur muttered. A page appeared at the door. The same one who had woken Merlin out of a dead sleep being an idiot the week before. She really ought to find out the boy’s name. Apparently Uther wished to see Arthur. Merlin followed Arthur to the council chambers.

“What did Morgause say to you before she let you up on the field?” he asked. Perfectly reasonable concern, Merlin had to agree.

“I must go to her within the next three days and accept a challenge from her,” Arthur answered.

“And what is to be the nature of this challenge?” Uther asked warily.

“She didn't say. But I gave her my word that I would accept it no matter what.”

“You should never have made such a promise. You have no idea what she might ask of you.” Uther was horrified. Clearly he knew that Morgause had magic.

“She had her sword to my chest. I had no choice,” Arthur protested. “Morgause said that she knew my mother.” Had she really?

“She told you this? Obviously she's lying. She's playing on your affections for your mother to lure you into a trap,” Uther stated firmly.

“That makes no sense. She spared my life.” 

“It confirms my suspicions. I believe Morgause is an enchantress. How else could she have defeated you?” Merlin bit her lips together to keep herself from laughing. Had anyone else noticed that he had just told Arthur that Ygraine had magic? No one else seemed to have noticed.

“I don't believe she was using magic,” Arthur said. “She fought the same as any of my knights.”

“And you would know for certain if she were?” Uther countered. “Under no circumstances will you go to meet her, or accept this challenge.” Merlin was not surprised by this pronouncement. Of course Uther would be wary of this, for the possible threat to his son and for the possibility that Morgause might sour Arthur’s opinion of his father with the truth of how he had won his throne.

“I gave her my word!” Arthur exclaimed.

“I don't care what was said to her. You will remain in Camelot.”

“I want to hear what she knows about my mother.”

“She knows nothing. She is lying,” Uther spoke too quickly, but no one else seemed to notice. “You will not go to her. I forbid it.”

“So I am to break my word?” Arthur was livid at the thought.

Uther gestured to the guards. “Escort my son to his chambers. Under no circumstances will he be allowed to leave.”

“You're confining me to my chambers?” Arthur demanded angrily.

“I am protecting you from your own foolishness!” Uther shouted back, temper getting the best of him.

The guards led Arthur back to his chambers. Merlin just trailed silently along behind them. They forced Arthur through his door and Merlin sniggered quietly behind her hand. Morgana turned the corner and made a rather amusing expression of confusion.

“What’s going on?”

“Uther has confined Arthur to his chambers. He’s not allowed to follow Morgause like he promised her when she granted him mercy.”

“Oh, have fun figuring out how to get him out,” Morgana replied. Merlin sniggered. Morgana giggled as well. She turned around, clearly no longer interested in trying to have a conversation with Arthur. Merlin couldn’t blame her; Arthur was in a prat mood. She had to go check on him though.

“So, when are we leaving?” she asked.

“As soon as you figure out a way out,” Arthur countered. “Go get supplies together.”

“You just stay here and look pretty,” Merlin agreed, trying not to smile, “I wouldn’t want you to strain something after your duel today.” Arthur let out a sound of pure rage and Merlin fled out of the room, laughing wildly.

Thankfully, it was not too difficult to get supplies together. She was pointedly ignored everywhere she went. At least, until she decided to borrow Gaius’ rope to escape. With a rope, Arthur could just climb out of his window, after all. But Gaius had to speak to her.

“How’s Arthur?”

“He’s been better. He was beaten by a girl and then his father locked him in his chambers. So he’s in a prat mood.”

“No wonder you’re hiding out here,” Gaius chuckled. Merlin smiled back. The rope in the corner slowly uncurled and slithered like a snake across the floor, up her trouser leg and wrapped around her waist. Merlin helped Gaius with his potions while the rope moved. She stayed for a few more minutes, about a quarter hour all totaled. Then she took her leave.

“Unfortunately, I better double check that Arthur doesn’t need anything and take his supper tray,” she lied. Gaius made a sympathetic noise and Merlin quickly ducked out the door. Everyone else continued to pointedly ignore her as she made her way back to Arthur’s chambers.

“I got the supplies,” Merlin announced her presence. Arthur turned around and then his whole face scrunched up in confusion.

“Are you getting fat?”

“Rude,” Merlin snapped back before she could even think. She pulled the tunic up to expose the rope. Arthur grinned happily at her.

“Good work.” Arthur gave her a pair of his gloves and flung some of the rope out the window and Merlin braced the rest. Arthur let her lower him most of the way down. Then they ran out of rope. Thankfully, he had the good sense to slide down the rest of the way. Merlin let the rope drop once the weight was gone and it slithered out the window. She returned his gloves and met him down in the courtyard. They got the horses out of the stables, saddlebags loaded down with food and water skins. Once they had ridden out of the citadel and into the woods, Merlin realized Arthur hadn’t told her where he was going.

“Where are we going?” she asked.

“Um…” Arthur blushed. “I’m supposed to just know when the time is right.”

“So, I guess she enchanted you so you’ll go the right way? That sounds reliable.” Arthur blanched at the thought of having been enchanted again. Merlin rolled her eyes at him. “Maybe you got lucky and she enchanted the horse.” Of course, they didn’t know until they got to the first fork in the road. Arthur wanted to go left. The horse went right. Merlin did not even attempt to keep her amusement to herself. Arthur let out a sound round of curses. They made a little conversation, but neither one of them was in a terribly talkative mood.

“What if Morgause wants you to do something else honorable than breaking your word?” Merlin asked. Arthur had no answer.

“My father is going to be so livid when I get back,” Arthur said a few hours later when they stopped briefly for some food.

“I’m definitely never going back if anything happens to you. I’ll just send a letter and go hide somewhere and change my name.”

“Don’t think that,” Arthur snapped, but he looked worried. They had ridden hard all night and through the day and it was late afternoon and they were in Odin’s territory now.  
It didn’t take too long before they were attacked. Merlin was thrown from her skittish horse and took out a few of the men from her position on the ground while Arthur was distracted being outnumbered three to one.

“Don't worry, Merlin. I'll deal with this, you lie there, make yourself comfortable,” he teased. Merlin stared up at him uncomprehendingly.

“Maybe we should turn back. The woods could be full of Odin's men.”

“You can go back if you want to, I won't stop you.”

“You don't know anything about Morgause! You don't know what she's gonna ask you to do! We don't even know where we're going, we're following a horse!” Merlin cried hysterically.

“Morgause said she knew my mother,” Arthur replied. Merlin froze. Right.

“Which way now?” she murmured quietly. Arthur dismounted to help her back on her horse, who was still snorting nervously. They were soon back on the road, but the sun was setting. Once it got dark they made camp. Merlin managed to gather enough wood for a small fire to ward off the chill, but she and Arthur still laid out their bedrolls side by side to keep warmer. It was already mid-October and the night was cold.

The next morning they were cold and wet with dew and both of them were too irritable to talk. Then, about midmorning, the enchanted horse led them to a lake and walked into it.

“Now where’s he going?” Arthur demanded.

“I think you’re going to get wet.”

“You don’t say.” Arthur twisted around to glare at her and made an impatient gesture at her to follow. Merlin couldn’t let him be left on his own at Morgause’s mercy, so she urged her horse to follow Arthur’s into the water. The lake never got too deep for the horses to stand, thankfully, and then they walked through the waterfall on the other side and found themselves somewhere drenched in power. Merlin nearly fell off her horse with the force of it. There was some sort of castle fortress.

“Where are we?” Merlin breathed.

“I don’t know.”

“There is power here,” she murmured, barely paying attention to Arthur and his reply. “Goddess alive.”

“Heathen,” Arthur mumbled teasingly. But he was staring up at the fortress with equal awe. They dismounted and walked into the open front gates. There was a small enclosed courtyard, like a chamber without a ceiling or floor, a block of wood with an axe in it, like the ones people used for woodcutting, and nothing else. There was no visible sign of Morgause. But Merlin could feel her. Her magic was in the walls, the ground, the air, and it was vibrantly alive with her proximity. Morgause was somewhere in the castle. With all the magic, it was hard to pinpoint exactly where the source was.

“Is it ruder to stay here and expect her to come to us or to search through her home?” Merlin asked. Arthur shrugged. Thankfully, they were saved from having to make a choice by the woman in question appearing on the stairwell.

“It would, of course, be ruder to search through my house uninvited,” Morgause said with a tight smile. “I see you kept your promise.”

“What is the nature of this challenge you wish to set me?” Arthur demanded. He seemed confident, but Merlin could see the strain belying his nerves about the situation. He had been raised in a court that was at war with magic after all and Morgause clearly did not lack for power.

“Put your head on the block.” Morgause’s easy confidence was not feigned. She had the power to back it up, after all. She picked the axe up out of the wood. “You gave me your word that you would do anything I asked.”

“Arthur, don’t!” Merlin protested. As she had expected, though, he did not even look at her before kneeling in front of the block and resting his chin on it, like a criminal before the executioner. “Arthur, please, I can’t let you do this!”

“Merlin, stay out of this,” Arthur ordered. She subsided reluctantly, watching Morgause intently. Morgause raised the axe, touched it to Arthur’s neck, hoisted it up over her head and brought it sharply down, only to veer away at exactly the last second. Merlin barely held in her shriek of terror but her gasping breaths of relief would not be denied. She darted to Arthur’s side, barely understanding Morgause’s words.”

“You have shown that you are truly a man of your word, Arthur Pendragon, and for that I will grant you one wish. Tell me what it is that your heart most desires.” Arthur was paying attention.

“You said you knew my mother. Tell me all you know about her.”

“Perhaps you would like to see her?” Morgause offered.

“But how?” Merlin asked. “I know you know better than to send him into the Beyond.”

“Of course,” Morgause agreed. “But that is not the only way to get a brief glimpse of those departed from this world too soon. Come.” She led them up into an altar room, one for visitors as it had no personal accoutrements. Morgause prepared for the ritual, but everything was to hand. She had expected him to ask for this.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Merlin whispered to Arthur.

“If you were granted the same opportunity, would you not want to meet your father?” Arthur thought she would have to agree.

“Arthur, I don’t know that my father’s dead. He could be a vagabond, some lay-about that ran when she told him she was with child, and that’s why Mother never brings him up. So, no, situation would not be the same. And I would much rather never know anything than discover that he was some vagabond.”

“My mother was not a vagabond,” Arthur whispered back, irritated.

“It isn’t her I’m worried about,” Merlin muttered to herself. Ygraine had never been tainted with her husband’s reputation for being a hypocrite because she had died before it happened. But that meant that if it was Ygraine, or even if this was some illusion conjured by Morgause for her own reasons, that Arthur might have his vision of his father permanently shattered. Arthur was too much a man of honor to take easily to the idea that his father had used magic to win his throne and then condemned and banned it, slaughtering nearly all his allies.

“Maybe my father is wrong about magic,” Arthur mumbled. “Morgause certainly hasn’t hurt me yet.”

“She still might.”

“It is time,” Morgause intoned, cutting off any reply Arthur might have made. “Close your eyes.” Arthur did. Merlin had no fear of magic and watched. Morgause winked at her before intoning the spell. Ygraine’s spirit, or a very good illusion, was suddenly standing before them. Magic was both more and less impressive than one might think that way. No bangs, no smoke, no fool’s tricks, just whatever you had asked for.

“Arthur,” the woman said. His eyes blinked open. She repeated his name, awestruck, and Arthur fell into his mother’s arms. Merlin smiled softly. She glanced over at Morgause. She seemed pleased, though it was hard to tell if a stranger was malevolently or innocently pleased.

“Mother.”

“My son,” Ygraine murmured wonderingly. “When I last held you, you were a tiny baby. I remember your eyes. You were staring up at me. Those few seconds I held you were the most precious of my life.”

“I'm so sorry,” Arthur said inexplicably. His mother seemed to agree.

“You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“It was my birth that caused you to die.”

“No, you are not to blame.”

“I cannot bear the thought that you died because of me.”

“Do not think that. It is your father who should carry the guilt for what happened.” He had gotten her pregnant. That made sense.

“What do you mean?” Oh dear, did Arthur not know where babies came from? Was Merlin really going to have to explain this to him?

“It is not important. What matters is that you lived.” Oh no. What had Uther done? Could Ygraine stop making that face?

“Why should my father feel guilty?”

“It is better left in the past.” Arthur, just trust your mother.

“You cannot leave me with more questions. Please.” Of course you can’t trust your mother.

“Your father, he was desperate for an heir. Without a son, the Pendragon dynasty would come to an end. But I could not conceive.”

“But how was I born? Tell me.” A life for a life gone horribly wrong…

“Your father betrayed me. He went to the sorceress Nimueh and asked for her help in conceiving a child... You were born of magic.”

“That's not true!”

“I'm sorry, Arthur. Your father has deceived you as he deceived me. To create a life, a life must be taken. Your father knew that.”

“No.” Poor Arthur was horrified. Of course, he well knew what his father’s betrayal of magic had cost. How many innocent lives lost. Morgause had to have planned this.  
“He sacrificed my life so the Pendragon dynasty could continue. It makes you no less my son nor me any less proud of you. Now I see you, I would have given my life willingly. Do not let this knowledge change you.” She disappeared.

“No! Bring her back!” Arthur protested.

“I cannot. Once the doorway is closed, it is closed forever.” Morgause began to amble towards the door. “I am truly sorry that you learnt of your mother's fate in this way. I can only imagine how it must feel to discover your father is responsible for her death. It is an unforgivable betrayal.” She left. Merlin was simply gawking at the whole situation.

“Are you alright? Arthur?” she asked.

“Fetch the horses. We're returning to Camelot.”

It was the last Arthur spoke to her until they reached the citadel. If she had thought that Arthur had been cruel in his traveling pace when they had been going to rescue Gwen, it was nothing compared to how quickly they traveled now. They did not stop for longer than two minutes together and with hours of traveling between each break. Merlin was frightened for Arthur, frightened for the horses. Arthur seemed a man possessed. They traveled all afternoon and through the night and into the morning. Finally, they reached Camelot. Merlin thought she might cry of relief. A chance to rest and eat! But Arthur basically jumped off his exhausted horse and drew his sword and raced into the castle. Merlin fell off her horse and tried to run after him, but she was exhausted and her balance was nearly nonexistent.

“Arthur!” she called out. Thankfully, Ewan was coming to meet them and helped her up the stairs and into the castle.

“What’s wrong?” he asked. “You look awful.”

“Um, Arthur’s really angry with his father and we were all the way down in Cornwall yesterday afternoon.”

“Oh God,” Ewan muttered. “Leon!” he bellowed.

“Busy!” came Leon’s return shout.

“I’m here!” Geraint came rushing down the stairs.

“Help Merlin up to Arthur’s chambers. I have to go stop Arthur from getting in a fight with the King.” Geraint grabbed her and Ewan dashed off.

“Up to wherever Uther is,” Merlin told Geraint firmly. He just nodded, picked her up and carried her up to the council chambers. Leon was guarding the door. The distinct sounds of a fight carried through the thick wood.

“No one is allowed inside,” Leon told them.

“Yeah, well, Arthur’s going to kill Uther if you don’t let someone inside to stop him,” Merlin snarled. Leon looked at her, seemed to suddenly realize that the fight in the council chambers might be an issue, turned and opened the door. Geraint dumped her onto unsteady feet and Merlin called up her magic to keep from falling over.

“Arthur! Don't! I know you don't want to do this!”

“My mother is dead because of him!” Arthur, at least, had stopped fighting for the moment, sword frozen with the point towards Uther but unmoving.

“Killing your father won't bring her back. You've lost one parent. Do you really want to lose another?” she asked. Arthur shook his head.

“Listen to him, Arthur,” Uther begged. Arthur’s expression hardened.

“Arthur, please, put the sword down,” Merlin urged, coming around to look Arthur in the face. “You don’t want to do this.” Arthur stared at her for a moment, looked at Uther cowering before him, and they both heard Ygraine’s insistence that Uther carried the guilt for her death echo in the air.

“You heard what my mother said! After everything he has done, do you believe he deserves to live?! He executes those who use magic, and yet he has used it himself! You have caused so much suffering and pain! I will put an end to that!” Arthur was too noble to allow such hypocrisy. But Arthur would be a shell of a man if he slaughtered his own father.

“Morgause is lying! She's an enchantress. She tricked you. That was not your mother you saw. That was an illusion. Everything...everything your mother said to you...those were Morgause's words.”

“You don't know that!”

“This has been her plan all along! To turn you against your father. This is what she wants! You think it was just coincidence that she mentioned knowing your mother and then happened to have all the accoutrements for the ritual she did to supposedly show you your mother? And then the only thing your mother has time to say is I love you, your father killed me?”

“Listen to him, he's speaking the truth,” Uther spoke up again.

“Swear to me it isn't true! You are not responsible for my mother's death! Give me your word!” Arthur needed the reassurance.

“I swear on my life, I loved your mother. There isn't a day passes that I don't wish that she were still alive. I could never have done anything to hurt her.” Merlin heard that Uther did not say that he had not gotten her pregnant with magic, but Arthur did not. His sword fell, he collapsed to his knees, slumped against his father’s chair. “My son, you mean more to me than...than anything.”

“I'm sorry. I'm sorry.” Arthur whispered.

“You are not to blame.”

Merlin left with Gaius, who had come in at some point, to give Arthur and Uther some time alone. Gaius fed her and let her rest and then sent her to Arthur with the tray at suppertime. Arthur was staring out the window, looking solemn.

“Arthur?”

“I am indebted to you, Merlin,” he said. “I had become... confused. It is once again clear to me that those who practice magic are evil and dangerous. And that is thanks to you.”

Merlin’s mouth fell open. Then she pasted a fake smile on her lips, “Glad I could help.”

“You’re dismissed. I was cruel to you and the horses on the trip back. Get your rest.”

“Yes, Arthur,” Merlin agreed and left the room. When she returned to Gaius’ chambers, Uther was standing, waiting. “Sire.”

“I wanted to thank you in person for your actions earlier. You are a loyal servant to Arthur. I am most grateful.”

“I was just doing my duty.”

“You've proven yourself to be a trusted ally in the fight against magic.”

“I lied to your son to keep him from taking your head off and losing his soul in the process, not for anything to do with you or magic,” Merlin snapped at him unthinkingly. Uther blinked at her.

“I see…” he murmured. He clearly did not see.

“Well, I knew that Ygraine was wrong. You didn’t offer her life when you went to Nimueh. I’d always wondered what happened that you turned on magic like you did, but it makes sense now. You asked a trusted friend to help you get an heir and instead of accepting your life as payment, she murdered your wife. I can understand how that would be upsetting enough to make you ban magic. But do not think for one moment that I agree with you.”

“Please, don’t tell Arthur,” Uther begged, looking like a lost old man, nothing like the king he ought to be. “He’ll hate me forever.”

“I will not bring it up unnecessarily, but I will offer you no promises either.” Uther nodded. Gaius walked in.

“Thank you, again,” Uther said and let himself out.

“What was he thanking you for?” Gaius asked. Merlin looked at him in complete bewilderment.

“Saving his life, obviously.”

“Oh, yes, I’m proud of you for that,” Gaius said. He babbled on inanely about how it had to have been difficult for her to save Uther’s life when she would have been safer letting Arthur kill him. She would not have. At some point, Arthur would have found out that Uther had offered his own life and then who knows what Arthur would have done trying to destroy Morgause for misleading him into murdering his own father. Merlin didn’t bother to argue with Gaius. She just went to bed and fell almost instantly to sleep and woke only once Gaius roused her. Arthur was late to council, but no one reprimanded her. Uther flinched when Arthur opened the doors and everyone pretended not to notice. Arthur babbled an apology at his father and everyone ignored his incoherence. Of course, the next day, Merlin was only a few minutes late and Arthur snapped at her. She had known it would not last.


	8. A Gentle Heart

Of course, as always, everything always had wonderful timing. That night Gaius had a house call to make. Some poor man had caught a bad sickness in his lungs. There was a storm. Merlin had to go with Gaius. Some bounty hunter had brought some poor terrified Druid girl to Uther to be burned.

“Gaius!” Merlin whispered.

“She’s fallen prey to a bounty hunter.”

“We have to do something.”

“We must do nothing. Bounty Hunters are dangerous men. You of all people should know that.” Merlin rolled her eyes, but let Gaius drag her off. Aredian had been dangerous. Some brute was nothing in comparison. He certainly wouldn’t leave brands on her chest. Arthur wouldn’t let anyone hurt her like that again. Once Gaius had fallen asleep, Merlin snuck back out. She was going to help that girl. The cage was in the same place and the poor girl was soaked through.

“Hey, I’m going to get you out,” Merlin whispered. Her magic unlocked the cage and she climbed in. The girl flinched. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to hurt you.” She opened the handcuffs and led the poor girl slowly out of the cage. Merlin was helping her down when the door to the tavern opened and some brute lumbered out. They quickly ducked behind the cage. Merlin took hold of the girl’s hand and they ran for it. Merlin ducked between buildings and led the way back up to the castle, down into one of the hidden tunnels under the castle. It technically led up into the cellar, but it was highly unlikely anyone would find the girl.

“They won’t find you here,” Merlin assured the girl, who still had yet to speak, though she had thankfully started shivering. Merlin shrugged out of her jacket. “Here.” The girl shrunk back. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to frighten you. Aren’t you cold?”

“Why did you do that?” Her voice was pretty, if a little rough from lack of recent use.

“Do what?”

“Help me.”

“It could have been me in that cage. I was arrested by a witch finder once. I couldn’t just do nothing.” Merlin offered the girl a smile. “You should be safe down here. No one comes down here and there’s enough entrances that you shouldn’t get cornered. I can come back in the morning with food and probably some candles. Will you be alright until then?”

“Yes,” she whispered.

“I’m Merlin, by the way.”

“I’m Freya.”

“Freya,” Merlin echoed. She handed Freya her jacket for warmth. “I’ll see you in the morning, Freya.”

“Thank you.” Merlin left through the tunnel that led out through the cellar. She snuck back up to Gaius’ chambers. No one saw her.

The next morning she woke early and searched through Gaius’ stores of food, but they really didn’t have enough to share. At least they had plenty of candles. Arthur could share food, though. Merlin rushed down to the kitchens, saying she was already late. They doubled the food on Arthur’s tray. Merlin didn’t feel bad. She would be eating some of it, after all. She took the breakfast up to Arthur, trying to figure out what she could take from his plate without him noticing. Because Freya would need more than one meal and the more times Merlin snuck down to her, the more likely it was that they would get caught. She tucked about half of the meat and both hunks of bread into her purse before she woke Arthur.

“Breakfast!” she called out cheerily. Arthur sat up, looking grumpy. Merlin stuffed one of the sausages off the tray into her mouth.

“What?” Arthur mumbled, looking at the tray of food while Merlin edged back towards the door. “You ate my bread, you sneak-thief!”

“I left you both the cheese!” Merlin told him cheerily.

“Do you have somewhere you need to be?” Arthur demanded.

“Of course not?” It came out more of a question than a statement.

“Ugh, fine, go sneak off, but come back quickly. I want a bath this morning!” Merlin happily ducked out the door. “And I have council!” Merlin ignored Arthur and rushed down to the kitchens again. Adara kindly offered to start heating the water for Arthur’s bath while Merlin ran a quick errand. She slunk down to the entrance to the tunnels near the cellar. Thankfully, it was near the wine cellar and no one used it in the mornings, so no one saw her.

Freya, understandably, was sleeping. Merlin smiled at the sight. Hopefully, she would be recovering from her ordeal at the hands of the bounty hunter. Poor girl had been left outside in a thunderstorm in late October after all. It was only about ten days until Samhain.

“Freya?” Merlin woke her gently. She shrunk back before recognizing her. “Yeah, it’s just me. I brought you some food.” Merlin handed the bread and meat to Freya while she set up the candles.

“It’s good,” Freya muttered.

“Believe me, it’s fit for a prince,” Merlin joked. She lit the candle with a wave of her hand. Freya had a Druid triskelion on her wrist. “Oh, are you a Druid?” Freya nodded. “Which tribe?”

“Why are you asking me all these questions?” Freya demanded suspiciously.

“I’m sorry, I was just curious,” Merlin explained. “You don’t have to answer.”

“No, I’m sorry for snapping,” Freya mumbled.

“I understand. You’ve had a rough time.”

“You could never understand.”

“I might could. I know what it’s like to keep secrets. I have magic too.”

“Does anyone know you have magic?”

“Two people in Camelot, aside from you, and both found out by accident. Neither one really understands. One’s only a sorcerer and the other has no magical ability at all.”

“I wish I was like everyone else,” Freya said wistfully.

“But we aren’t.”

“Because I’m cursed.”

“Don’t say that. Magic is a gift from the goddess, not a curse. See?” Merlin made a small butterfly in the palm of her hand. Freya beamed.

“Beautiful.”

“I probably ought to get back before Arthur throws a tantrum. I’ll come back down soon as I can though, with more food.”

“Thank you!” Freya was clearly a little overwhelmed by the prospect of kindness. Merlin wished that the poor girl had not been subjected to that brute’s cruelness for so long. She met Adara in the kitchens, the water still heating up. Merlin took the first load up to Arthur.

“Did you do whatever is was you wanted?”

“Yes.”

“Good. The rest of the water heating up?”

“Yes.”

“Good, go get it. I do have council today, remember?”

“Vaguely,” Merlin teased.

“Go get the rest of the water for my bath,” Arthur ordered fondly, trying to hide his smile. Merlin obediently scampered back down to the kitchens and thanked Adara profusely and took the second load of water up to Arthur’s chambers.

“Ta-da!” Merlin said. “Hot water in the tub and the door’s locked.” Arthur padded out from behind his screen and happily sank into the hot water.

“Oh, yeah, this is lovely,” he mumbled to himself. Merlin shook her head and ignored him, getting started on her chores: chamber pot, change the rushes, build up the fire, make the bed, lay out clothes for Arthur, take the breakfast tray back to the kitchens, tidy up after Arthur. Merlin had a pretty quiet day, considering that the bounty hunter, who was apparently named Halig, who names their child Halig?, had told Uther that the girl had escaped and the guards were searching for her. Of course, she popped in while Arthur was training with the knights that afternoon to see if Gaius needed help and he was immediately suspicious of her.

“Do you know anything about the girl?”

“What girl?” Merlin feigned complete ignorance.

“The girl from the bounty hunter’s cage. She escaped last night.”

“Good. I'm pleased. Hopefully she’ll be long gone by now.”

“They're out hunting for her.”

“Of course they are.” Merlin made a face.

“Did you help her escape?”

“No.” That was a lie but Merlin felt like she had done very well in not letting it show on her face.

“Merlin?”

“You told me not to get involved.”

“You promise me you'd nothing to do with this?”

“Yes!” Merlin was rather exasperated by this line of questioning. See if she popped in to help Gaius any time Arthur didn’t need her in the next fortnight.

“Good. Because when Halig finds out who helped her, I wouldn't want to be in their shoes.” Gaius clearly did not believe her. How rude. Merlin did not even offer her help; she just went back to Arthur.

That night, Merlin stole one of Arthur’s drumsticks and all three of his sausages. Arthur was not amused and glared at her. Merlin tried to convince him that he had eaten the meat himself, but they both knew he hadn’t. Arthur dismissed her immediately, the implied order to be better behaved in the morning coming through loud and clear. Merlin gratefully slipped down into the lower town to use a different entrance. At this time of night, the wine cellar was likely to be well-frequented. Unfortunately, Merlin ran into Halig. She still was not over that name, who named their child Halig? It sounded like a disease. Which given how his breath stank, was possibly apt. He dragged her down into the dungeons and Merlin kicked up a bit of a fuss as they passed Galahad. He caught her eye and gasped, turning and running back up the stairs. Please Goddess let Arthur not be too angry with her to come save her.

Halig dumped the water pitcher she had been hiding the meat in out and Arthur’s food dropped into the dirty straw on the floor. Merlin sighed. Now she’d have to clean it before she would dare give it to Freya to eat.

“It’s just the Prince’s leftovers.”

“Does he know you steal his food?”

“Not exactly,” Merlin admitted with a wince.

“Where were you taking it?”

“Home. For my dinner. I send most of my wages to my mother, you see, and sometimes the prices at the market are more than I saved for myself.”

“Really? The druid girl I'm looking for, have you seen her?” Halig clearly thought she was involved too. Was there some sort of sign on her?

“No.”

“Do you know how much money she's worth to me?” Merlin shook her head. “More than your life.” She seriously doubted that. “So I'm asking you again. Have you seen the druid girl?”

Merlin shook her head again. “No.”

“Hold him,” he ordered the guards. They carefully pushed her down into a chair and held her still. “I think you're lying to me.” The guards had clearly learned from Arthur’s temper last time.

“I'm not!” she insisted.

“Halig,” one of the guards spoke up warningly. Halig glared him back into silence.

“I don't believe you,” he sneered. He swung his arm back, and Merlin flinched in, away from the hit, but it never came.

“Sire,” the guards murmured. Merlin opened her eyes. Arthur had come for her. Praise be!

“Halig! What do you think you're doing?”

“We caught the boy behaving suspiciously, Sire.” Halig clearly had not been informed of the court politics here.

“Merlin?” Arthur scoffed.

“He could be harboring the girl, and he's gonna tell us where,” Halig replied. Oh, he was just really out of the loop. Arthur pulled Merlin away from Halig, standing half in front of her.

“Leave him alone. Merlin is my servant. He has my absolute trust. If you have a problem with him, you come to me. Do you understand?” Halig finally got the picture.

“Sire,” he bowed. “Goodnight, Merlin. Don't forget your dinner.” Arthur looked down at his dinner on the floor.

“Thank you,” Merlin mumbled. Arthur sighed.

“Are those my sausages?”

“They might be,” Merlin admitted.

“You took them?” Arthur asked.

“To keep you in shape,” she teased, bending to pick up the sausages and drumstick. Arthur obligingly did not ask her what she was really doing.

“Are you saying I'm fat?” he demanded in outrage.

“No!” Merlin shook her head. “Well, not yet, anyway.”

“I am not fat!”

“You see? It’s working!” Merlin scurried out of the dungeons, Arthur close on her heels. Once they reached a quiet corner where Halig could not overhear, Arthur boxed her in with her back to the wall.

“What did you tell Halig?”

“It’s for my dinner. I send most of my pay to my mother and I didn’t keep enough back for myself because prices went up in the market.”

“Don’t steal my food again,” Arthur grumbled. “Go on.” Merlin went back out to meet Freya while Arthur presumably went back up to his chambers. She tucked the meat in her neckerchief and filled the water pitcher at the pump before heading down to the tunnels. No one would notice it missing.

“I’m sorry I took so long,” she said, handing her the pitcher and the neckerchief with meat in it. Freya looked inordinately pleased, but also like she had been crying. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, is that meat?”

“Yes, to keep your strength up. You look upset. Are you sure it’s nothing?”

“Yes, it’s nothing.” She was clearly lying.

“Oh! Did you think I wasn’t coming?” Merlin was horrified for her. What had poor Freya been through?

“I scare most people away,” she admitted quietly.

“I’m not most people.” Freya smiled shyly up at her. “How long were you in that cage?”

“A few days,” she answered briefly.

“You poor thing,” Merlin whispered. “No wonder you were scared of me. Will you tell me how he caught you?”

“You can’t always trust people.” It was enough of an answer for Merlin to guess what had happened.

“That’s why I left home. My mother was afraid that the neighbors would tell the King I had magic.”

“Where is home?” Freya asked with a sweet smile.

“Ealdor, over the border in Essetir; it’s a small village, just a few houses, a field, a couple cows. But it’s on the old Druid path and I got to grow up knowing the Goddess, celebrating her holy days.”

“That sounds lovely,” Freya smiled.

“What about you? Where do you call home?”

“My home was next to a lake surrounded by the tallest mountains. In the winter the storms whipped up the water into waves and you thought they were going to crash down and take away all the houses. But in the summer, wild flowers and light. It was like heaven.”

“Sounds perfect,” Merlin whispered. The light in Freya’s face made it clear that she had loved her home.

“It was.”

“Was?”

“My family died.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry!”

“It’s not your doing.”

“Have you been on your own all this time?” Freya nodded. “Well, you aren’t on your own anymore. I’m going to look after you. I promise.” Freya, of course, didn’t believe her, but they talked for a little longer before Merlin had to leave for the night. Arthur would be livid with her if she got him in trouble for protecting her when she really had been breaking the law.

The next morning, Merlin had woken early and gotten breakfast for two, ate a little herself and took the rest down to Freya, but she couldn’t stay. It was a good thing she had left when she did because she had almost just walked back in to Arthur’s chambers through the servant’s door when Gaius knocked on the main door, looking for Arthur. Arthur seemed not to have any suspicions of her, but Merlin thought he might know that she was hiding Freya. Apparently there had been some sort of unusual death and Uther wanted Arthur to come with him down to the body. Arthur followed Gaius out. Merlin went about her chores, humming a little. She quite liked Freya.

Arthur came back pale and shaken. “Merlin, the sword that killed the wraith, I need you to get it.”

“What’s happened?” she asked. Arthur looked at her sharply but then shook his head, almost at himself.

“It was a very unusual death. It seems to have been the work of some sort of magical creature. Father wants me to figure out what it is and kill it. But magical creatures are rather difficult to kill.”

“True,” Merlin agreed.

“Just get it to me by morning. I doubt we’ll find the creature tonight.” Arthur seemed to be keeping something from her, but Merlin didn’t worry about it. She finished out her day’s chores, took more food down to Freya and chatted with her did some chores for Gaius, and then snuck back down to see Freya again.

“What are you doing here?” Freya asked.

“I couldn't help it.”

“It's dangerous.”

“I don't care.”

“No, Merlin, you have to be careful,” she urged.

“Ugh, I'm fed up with being careful. I am fed up with all of this. So I've decided, we're going to get you out of here, out of Camelot.”

“How?”

“I'll get you some clothes, disguise you.” Merlin smiled at her. Freya looked upset. “What's wrong?”

“It's just, I'm going to miss you,” she said.

“No, you won't, because I'm going to come with you.” Arthur would surely be fine on his own. He had survived almost 21 years without her help and he had a dragon-fire burnished sword. He would live. Merlin wanted to live.

“What?” Freya seemed shocked.

“I told you I'm going to look after you.”

“You can't. Don't say that.”

“It's not what you want?” Did Freya not like her back? Did she not want her to come along?

“Merlin, you have a good life here. My life is...” she made a noise of frustration. “I have to keep moving, always looking over my shoulder, people chasing me.”

“Then we'll go somewhere no one knows us. Somewhere far away,” she promised. “You haven't given me your answer.”

“I want that more than anything. Where will we go?”

“Somewhere with mountains,” Merlin suggested.

“A few fields.”

“Wild flowers.”

“A couple of cows.”

“And a lake.”

“And a lake,” Freya echoed. Merlin had to leave though, because she had to take Arthur his sword first and his sword was a fair distance away. Thankfully, no one noticed her sneaking out of the citadel and she made good time, making it back with time for a decent nap before sunrise.

Arthur was glad for the sword and didn’t ask when she left that morning. Apparently the creature had struck again. Arthur would catch up to it soon enough. Merlin headed over to Morgana’s to borrow one of her dresses. Thankfully, Morgana was not in, but Gwen walked in while Merlin was trying to decide what would fit Freya.

“Merlin?” Gwen asked. “I'm sure there's an obvious explanation.”

“There is.” Merlin agreed.

“Which is?”

“Moths.” How addle-brained could one be? Moths?!

“Moths?” Gwen echoed, as unimpressed with Merlin’s lie as she was.

“Yes. The castle's overrun with them.”

“Really?”

“I was just checking that they hadn't got in here as well. You and Morgana were both out, so I thought there was no harm in my looking for you.”

“And have they?” Gwen asked. Merlin looked down at the dress in her hands.

“That's, that's totally infested. We'll have to burn it.”

“Burn it?” Gwen’s eyes went wide. Well, Merlin certainly wasn’t going to be giving the dress back.

“Yeah. And if we don't stop them, we'll all be walking around naked.” What utter nonsense was she going to spout next? Merlin hurried out the door before she said anything else ridiculous. Gwen, lovely soul that she was, let her escape.

“Good grief, what is Merlin up to? How’m I supposed to explain…” Gwen muttered as she shut the door behind her. Of course, Merlin did not have good luck. As she was crossing to the stairs, Arthur was coming the other way. He stopped and turned to stare at her.

“What are you doing?” Her mind was completely empty.

“Er, running an errand for Gaius.” Oh Goddess, kill me now.

“For Gaius?” Arthur echoed incredulously.

“Yes.”

“Strange.”

“Oh, I don't think it's for him,” Merlin babbled idiotically.

“As long as you do a decent day's work, Merlin, that's all I care about,” Arthur replied. Merlin’s eyes went wide. But this was a good excuse. She let herself blush.

“No, no. It's not for me.”

“What a man does in his spare time is completely up to him,” Arthur said, looking like he might giggle at her.

“No, you- you've got this wrong,” Merlin pretended to protest.

“Color suits you, Merlin,” Arthur told her kindly and left. Merlin thought she might die. He had to know. Didn’t he? Oh good heavens, what if he didn’t? Never mind that, Merlin was leaving. It was irrelevant what Arthur thought of her. It was important what Freya thought of her.

Merlin took the dress down to Freya, who once again balked a little at Merlin’s kindness before accepting the dress. Then Freya sent her off to get supplies. Merlin could borrow her horse from Arthur, leave it for the patrol near the border. They would of course need food and water and blankets, but that would be easy enough. Then they could leave at sundown.

Merlin got back up to Gaius’ chambers and he looked deadly serious.

“Merlin, sit down. I want to talk to you.”

“Is everything alright? You look worried.”

“The beast struck again last night. There are two more deaths in the lower town.” Oh, how dreadful. All the better to leave now, while they were focused on the creature, rather than Freya.

“Do you know what it is yet?”

“Once more there were no tracks around the bodies, but human footprints were leading away from them.”

“Right…” Merlin said slowly. No one had said anything about human footprints to her. Of course, she had been running off to spend time with Freya.

“It doesn't seem to add up. The footprints would indicate a human was responsible, but the wounds inflicted are definitely the work of some kind of beast.”

“Strange,” Merlin agreed.

“Yes. Until I remembered what Halig said about the druid girl, that she's cursed. The Druids turned her out because of the curse.”

“What's that got to do with the monster?” Ice cold dread was building in her stomach.

“The ancient chronicles speak of a heinous curse. It dooms its victim to turn at the stroke of midnight into a vicious, bloodthirsty beast. The writers of old called this creature a Bastet: a monster of nightmare that inhabits the twilight world between the living and the dead. Merlin, I want the truth. Did you release the druid girl from the cage?”

“I did what was right.”

“You know the creature and the girl are one and the same.” She knew no such ridiculousness.

“You're wrong. Freya is just a girl, a scared, lonely little girl.”

“Merlin, please think about what I'm saying. You know it is the truth. Where is she now?”

“No.”

“She's killed already, and she'll kill again. She can't stop herself.”

“It doesn’t matter, we’re leaving tonight anyway.” Gaius went pale as a ghost and stood up abruptly. “Please, Gaius. Where are you going?”

“To Uther.”

“I'm begging you! Just give me some time to get her out of the city, please.”

“I'm sorry. I can't let more innocent people die.” Gaius left. Merlin stared at the door for a long moment, unable to believe that he would so easily condemn a girl to the pyre. Then she rushed back down to the tunnels. They would run. It would have to be fast enough. Freya had already left, and left Morgana’s dress in the straw. Oh, it was true. She hadn’t meant magic was a curse, she had meant a literal curse. Merlin broke down sobbing. She eventually dried her tears and dragged herself back up to her room. Gaius tried to apologize but Merlin did not want an apology. She wanted Freya safe and sound, far away from Camelot.

The warning bells rang. Merlin ran down to the courtyard, reaching it in time to see Arthur stab a large black cat with wings in the shoulder. He had the dragon sword. The cat flew off rather than attack. Merlin rushed to meet Freya down in the tunnels. Arthur graciously pretended not to see her.

Freya was unclothed and sobbing when Merlin caught up. She shrugged off her jacket and wrapped it around her. “You're all right. You're safe now.”

“You must hate me.”

“No.”

“I'm a monster. I tried to tell you.”

“I know.”

“I wasn't always like this.”

“Shh. You shouldn't try to talk.”

“There was a man. He attacked me. I didn't mean to hurt him, but I thought he was going to kill me, or worse.”

“It was an accident.”

“His mother was a sorceress, and when she find out that I'd killed her son, she cursed me to kill forever more.”

“I'm going to make you better, Freya.” She knew there was no hope. Not with the sword Arthur had.

“No, Merlin, the wound's too deep. Please go.”

“No. I'm not leaving you here alone.” Merlin managed to help Freya into Morgana’s dress and she took her to the lake of Avalon. At least she could find some peace there, with the mountains and lake. And she had to return Arthur’s sword. He had left it in Duane’s saddle for her, the horse saddled and ready to go as an apology. They reached the lake and Freya was getting steadily weaker, mostly asleep as they rode.

“You remembered,” Freya whispered happily.

“Of course. I'm so sorry for what that sorceress did to you.”

“Merlin, you have nothing to be sorry for.”

“I wish there was some way to save you.”

“You've already saved me. You made me feel loved.”

“I do love you. I don't want you to go.”

“One day, Merlin, I will repay you. I promise.” Freya died in her arms. Merlin felt horrible. She had gotten that sword for Arthur. That had to have been what he had been keeping from her. He must have known that she was helping the Druid girl. At least he had been kind enough to keep it from her. Merlin put Freya to rest on a boat she conjured from the closest tree. She flung the sword back into the lake and then pushed Freya off. She was almost sobbing too hard to set the boat alight, but she managed.

Then she went back to the castle. There was nothing for her anywhere else and she might as well make sure that Arthur didn’t get himself killed. Gaius was so ecstatic to have her back, he forgot to be angry. Then, when she explained that Freya was dead, he pulled her into a bear hug and Merlin sobbed into his shoulder. Once her tears had dried, he sent her to Arthur. She did still have chores. She started with changing the rushes and was cleaning his boots when Arthur walked in.

“Ah, Merlin. I’ve been looking for you.”

“Yeah, right, you're gonna ask me to polish your armor and to wash your clothes and clean your room,” Merlin muttered. Arthur sat down on the floor next to her with a sympathetic expression.

“Something's been upsetting you, hasn't it?”

“Maybe.”

“Was it when I accused you of being a sneak thief?”

“It wasn't very nice.”

“It was a bit unfair. Like when you called me fat.”

“Why was that unfair?”

“Because I am not f...” Arthur cut himself off by putting her into a headlock and rubbing her hair vigorously with his knuckles.

“Ow! Ah!” Merlin protested, trying in vain to wriggle out of his hold. Arthur was stronger than her.

“Still think I need to get in shape?”

“No! No! No, no, no, no!”

“That's better,” Arthur let her go.

“Thanks,” Merlin mumbled.

“You are right, though. You need to polish my armor, wash my clothes, and clean my room.” Merlin groaned. Arthur laughed good naturedly.


	9. Alined is Cruel

Things at least had the decency to stay quiet for the following week, while Merlin was grieving. There were reassuring intermittent rain storms the whole week. Gwen figured it all out and gave Merlin her condolences one afternoon, while they were both doing laundry. But other than that, the only thing of interest was Ewan leaving the citadel to go home and marry his sweetheart. Merlin had not been prepared, but since it was the last week in October, Ewan had to leave before the threat of snow grew too great to travel and he, of course, wanted to return to his sweetheart. Galahad was staying, and would start training to take Ewan’s place in the spring. Merlin saw little of anyone who wasn’t Arthur or Gaius that week, hiding out from the chaotic preparations for the Kings who were coming to sign the treaty. Four Kings had agreed: Alined, of Deorham, Olaf, of Norway, James, of Deira, and Rhys, of Anglia. Merlin had been a little surprised that Alined, who had three Court Sorcerers and welcomed magic in his kingdom, would want to ally to Uther, but there were likely other factors. Probably the same ones about peace bringing prosperity that Uther had been looking at when he invited him to alliance.

Merlin was a little more irritable about the whole thing when she discovered that the Kings were arriving on Samhain. Gaius had told her that they did still celebrate Samhain because it could be simplified to honoring ancestors in an attempt to help her cheer up. But they would not be celebrating Samhain this year, instead she would be attending Arthur at a dull feast like the one for Bayard. Uther would make a speech. The other kings would accept the toast. They might make speeches of their own. Finally the food would be served. Arthur would get drunk and have a tantrum after and then he would be in a positively foul mood the next morning and Merlin was really not looking forward to this break in routine. Plus, there was always the possibility of someone sneaking in with the extra four royal households to cause trouble. Just because Nimueh was no longer a threat in that respect did not mean that Uther wasn’t putting more guards on rotation together, in an attempt to discourage anyone from trying it.

Merlin managed to hide from Arthur in time to avoid having to be part of the welcome for all the arriving Kings. If Alined had brought one of his sorcerers, then it would be better if they weren’t gawking at her upon first arrival. King Olaf had brought his daughter, who Gwen said was fair less fair of temperament than she was of face. Apparently she had insulted Gwen the moment she walked into the room without even having the chance to actually have been disappointed. Merlin was helping Arthur dress for the feast that evening and he was clearly already in a prat mood.

“Merlin, what kind of impression do you think this gives?” Arthur demanded, coming out from behind his screen with his thumb wiggling through a hole in his sleeve. Merlin winced. She had meant to grab the other one.

“That we have moths?”

“Fetch me another.” Merlin snatched up the one she had meant to give him in the first place and handed it to him, taking the one with a hole and making a note to mend it.

“And who might you be trying to impress?” she teased.

“Well, let me see,” Arthur rolled his eyes. “Perhaps the five kings sitting in the banquet hall below.”

“Oh. Not the King Olaf's daughter, then? The Lady Vivian, she is very beautiful.”

“Anyone trying to impress the Lady Vivian does so at extreme peril. Olaf'd have their head in a vat of hot oil before they'd have a chance to say hello.” Arthur made a scoffing noise. “Besides, she's not my type. She may be beautiful, but she's incredibly rude. You should've heard what she said to Gwen.”

“Anyone insulting Gwen should do so at extreme peril,” Merlin muttered.

“What?” Arthur asked with a warning glare.

“Nothing. I just know how you feel about her, that's all. That is, if your feelings haven't changed, as I presume they haven't, since I haven’t noticed any nighttime visitors.”

“I do have my own vat of hot oil, you know,” Arthur grumbled. Merlin laughed. He wouldn’t hurt her, not for running her mouth, certainly.

“You're blushing!” She told him. He wasn’t.

“No I'm not.”

“What's wrong with Gwen?”

“Nothing,” Arthur peeked out, looking for Morgana, probably.

“I think she's very worthy of your love.”

“Indeed, were it so,” Arthur said, looking at her a little strangely.

“Which... it is so.” 

“Merlin,” he said warningly.

“Yes, Arthur?”

“Get out.”

“Yes, Sire,” Merlin ducked out the door but didn’t go far. Sure enough, Arthur came stomping out the door only a moment behind her and dragged her back in to help him with the ties on his jacket.

“You will not try to entertain Morgana with your sharp tongue tonight,” Arthur ordered. “Alined has brought a fool to entertain us.”

“How kind of him,” Merlin said absently, wondering if Alined’s fool was actually a sorcerer. It would be a good way to keep Uther from looking too suspiciously at him.  
He was. Trickler was most definitely a sorcerer. He conjured a dozen butterflies right in Uther’s face. Merlin was gawking most unattractively but she really could not have cared less. Had Alined taken complete leave of his senses? Right in Uther’s face? Magic was banned on pain of death in Camelot. Somehow Uther seemed to have not realized that it was magic. He was just nodding and smiling mildly. Morgana and Vivian liked the display. Merlin made herself shut her mouth before Arthur saw.

She was even more grateful when Arthur didn’t ask for mead when he retired. No mead, no drunken tantrum to clean up, less certainty of a foul mood in the morning. Merlin hurried through her evening chores before he could change his mind.

Gaius, at least, was as shocked as Merlin that Alined had so blatantly displayed a sorcerer like that before Uther.

“Conjured butterflies?” Gaius was gawking just as unattractively as Merlin had done when she saw it.

“I thought I had hallucinated for a moment. And Uther was just nodding along and smiling and told him it was skill indeed!”

“Do you think it’s just a political statement? That he refuses to acknowledge Uther’s law banning all magic?”

“I hope so, but I’m going to keep a close eye on Trickler for the next few days, in case they’re trying to make a bit bigger of a statement.”

“Surely they wouldn’t come in the name of peace, wanting to kill Uther, or even Arthur?”

“And what better way to gain access to the king and prince?” Merlin countered. Gaius nodded in concession.

“Well, you better get some sleep. You have a long day ahead.” They neither one realized how right he was.

Merlin got to Arthur’s chambers with his breakfast on time, only to find Arthur already up, staring out the window at something.

“Good morning!”

“Never have you been more right, Merlin. It is the sunniest, the most fragrant, the most beautiful morning I've ever seen in my life.” What?

“You're dressed.” He was fully clothed, all by himself.

“I am the future King of Camelot, I do have some skills, you know.”

“Indeed, you are very skilled at getting people to do things for you,” Merlin retorted. What was this?

“That is your job. But today my job is to woo.”

“To what?”

“To woo,” Arthur was looking at her as though she was addled. “I wish to make a proclamation of love.” To Gwen? She preferred Lancelot.

“Really? I thought you wanted to keep your feelings secret?”

“Why would I want to do that? By the end of today I will have won my lady.”

“Right,” Merlin wasn’t arguing. Arthur had clearly gotten into some sort of mead this morning. “Well, what will you tell your father?”

“What does my father matter?” Arthur scoffed.

“Um, Gwen is Morgana’s handmaiden. She’s a servant. Your father isn’t likely to approve of this.”

“Who said anything about Gwen?” Arthur asked. He looked legitimately confused. Merlin startled.

“Then who on Earth are you talking about?” she demanded.

“The Lady Vivian, obviously!”

“Oh, Goddess, what about her father?!”

“It’s love, Merlin, he’ll just have to accept it.”

“That’s one way of approaching things,” she mumbled weakly.

“So, I need your help in expressing my feelings.”

“Of course.” This would only end in tragedy.

“How to express my feelings…” Arthur prompted.

“Oh, I see. Erm. Feelings….” She babbled incoherently.

“Feelings,” Arthur echoed agreeably.

“Girls…”

“Girls.”

“Flowers?” she suggested. Gwen and Morgana liked flowers. Merlin liked flowers. Freya had liked flowers.

“Excellent. Find some. Perhaps you should also send a note.”

“Brilliant idea.”

“Something moving. Something from the heart. Something…” Arthur trailed off, then shrugged. “You'll think of something.” Oh Goddess this was not going to end well. Merlin did not go to get flowers. She went to Uther.

“Yes, what is it?” he asked.

“Arthur has decided to woo the Lady Vivian this morning,” Merlin just blurted it out. Uther turned to stare at her in horror.

“Olaf will have his head.”

“So you see why I’m not gathering flowers and writing a moving note from the heart for him,” Merlin replied inanely. Uther nodded absently.

“I’ll speak to him. Do not aid him in this endeavor. I cannot imagine what he’s thinking.”

“Me either. He was most displeased with her for insulting Morgana’s maid the moment she entered the room last night before the feast. I hadn’t realized she had charmed him so thoroughly at the feast that he had dismissed it.”

“He didn’t like her last night?” Uther repeated.

“No, said she was pretty but cruel,” Merlin affirmed. “I’d handed him the wrong shirt by mistake and he was certainly not trying to impress Vivian because her father would dump him into a vat of hot oil.”

“Thank you for bringing the matter to my attention so promptly,” Uther said, “Go try to keep my son from making a fool of himself. I’m sure we’ll have this all sorted out soon enough.” Merlin obediently left. Hopefully Uther could talk some sense into Arthur. She did end up picking flowers for Vivian and leaving them with a note, but it was just an unsigned note that said Welcome to Camelot. She was neither furthering Arthur’s suit nor lying to him when he asked her if she had done as he asked.

Arthur, thankfully, spent most of the day in the treaty talks with his father and the other Kings. Unfortunately, Merlin was off doing chores when they stopped the discussions for the day and Arthur had already gotten to Vivian’s door when Merlin caught up to him.

“Just five minutes!”

“Arthur, I don’t think your advances are welcome,” she ventured.

“Go away!” Vivian called through the door. “And take your stupid chicken with you!” Merlin hid her laugh as a cough.

“I don’t know what gave you that impression,” he said snottily, shoving the tray into her arms. Merlin waited a moment for him to get around the corner.

“My lady, my sincere apologies for his behavior. He’s been behaving out of sorts today. Is there anything I can get you?” There was a silence for a moment.

“I would like a bath.”

“I’ll have one of the chambermaids bring one up and assist you,” Merlin assured her. She went back down to the kitchens, bringing Bridget with her to get Vivian’s bath.

“Did the prince really take that up to the Lady Vivian?” Awena asked.

“Arthur is much better behaved than that,” Merlin snapped. “Where’s his supper, by the by?” Awena quieted and handed over the platter for Arthur’s supper. He got to eat in his room alone, at least. Merlin hurried back up to Arthur’s chambers, only to find Morgana and Gwen already there.

“Are you mad? Have you taken leave of your senses?” Morgana demanded.

“I didn’t bring enough for everyone,” Merlin mumbled in apology, setting Arthur’s food down on the table.

“I have fallen in love!”

“You sound like an idiot.”

“You should have heard him this morning,” Merlin muttered. Gwen laughed.

“So, any idea what’s brought this on?” she asked. Arthur and Morgana were still bickering about his wooing Vivian.

“Absolutely none. This time yesterday, he thought she was cruel and rude. Then suddenly this morning, he was singing her praises. I’m assuming they must have talked more at the feast last night than I thought, but clearly Arthur wasn’t as impressive as she was. She slammed the door in his face.” 

“I’m not surprised,” Gwen muttered. “I don’t like her.”

“That’s it! I can’t even speak to you when you’re like this!” Morgana shouted, storming out of Arthur’s chambers. Gwen waved as she hurried out after Morgana. Merlin waved back.

“Your supper, Arthur?” Merlin pointed out the food on the table. Arthur gratefully sat down to eat. About the time he finished and Merlin was gathering the tray to take back down to the kitchens, Uther appeared in the door. Merlin nearly ran out of the room to get away from that conversation. When she returned, Arthur was sitting on the edge of his bed looking extremely morose and Uther had already left.

“Go on, Merlin. Say it.”

“What?” Merlin helped Arthur out of his clothes as they spoke.

“You do not think I should pursue my love.” Had he finally noticed?

“Well, seeing as you asked, I think a number of things stand in the way of a happy union between you and the Lady Vivian: her bloodthirsty father, for one.”

“Her complete lack of interest for another,” Arthur added.

“Might it be worthwhile returning to your old love? Although, I have my reservations about that as well.” Namely: Gwen’s preference for Lancelot and her own general lack of interest in Arthur. Arthur climbed into bed.

“What are you talking about, Merlin? I don't have an old love.” Merlin didn’t argue. Arthur was clearly out of sorts. He found some sort of blonde hair under his pillow and shoved it at her. “What on earth? You really need to start paying attention to the details.” He obviously thought it was his own hair, but it was the wrong color and texture. Had Arthur been enchanted? It would certainly explain the abrupt change in behavior this morning. Merlin went to fetch Gaius on her way to see Uther again.

“I still don’t see…”

“You haven’t been listening to Arthur all day,” Merlin grumbled.

“Yes, Merlin?” Uther asked.

“Arthur found this under his pillow. I’m certain it isn’t his hair. It’s too fair and it’s softer.”

“But Vivian’s hair is this shade,” Uther murmured. “Gaius, could you lay a love enchantment with the object of affection’s hair?”

“Oh… yes, yes you could.”

“Alined.” Uther’s face turned murderous.

“But why would he want to ruin the peace talks with war?”

“Most of his kingdom’s wealth is in making war. We’ve been discussing how he could turn to trade and fishing and farming to secure that wealth, but perhaps he feels it’s too risky.”

“Well, we cannot be certain of anyone except Olaf,” Gaius spoke up. “He’s too protective of Vivian to play this kind of trick. It really could be anyone. Or even a random sorcerer taking advantage of the situation. It can hardly be difficult to stay hidden when four different Kings bring their households here, after all.”

“Yes, Gaius, you are right. I must not jump to hasty conclusions. Besides, so long as Vivian maintains her indifference, Arthur will be perfectly safe and the peace talks in no danger.”  
“  
Exactly, Sire,” Gaius agreed. “If it please you, I will retire to look through some of my old books to see if I can figure out how to get Arthur un-enchanted.”

“Yes, thank you,” Uther nodded and waved his hand dismissively at them. Merlin and Gaius hurried out.

Of course Merlin ended up helping Gaius look. She fell asleep reading, trying to narrow down the ridiculously long list of love enchantments. Why were there so many?

“Breakfast.” Gaius woke her. Was it truly morning already?

“There are over 636 love spells in these books, and over 150 of them involve a lock of hair,” she grumbled.

“Is there no way we can narrow them down a bit?” Gaius asked. As though that thought had not already crossed her mind hours ago.

“I have. Look. If I choose this one and it's wrong, Arthur will end up as a toad. And if this one's wrong, Vivian will lose all her hair.”

“Olaf might not declare war for that, but she certainly would.” Merlin nodded. “Eat your breakfast.” Merlin ate. She would certainly not want to be too hungry to think. She was already going to be tired.

She managed to send Arthur off on a ride to “cheer his spirits” that morning, hoping it would at least keep him from having any time for Vivian before his father had him stuck in the last of the peace treaty discussions that afternoon. They would all have to pray that whatever enchantment it was that Arthur would actually remember some of that experience for when he was king. Merlin was happily doing her chores in peace.

Someone suddenly knocked on the door. Merlin hoped it was Gaius or Uther with a solution to Arthur being enchanted. She opened the door. It was Vivian, looking strangely delighted, and wearing her nightgown.

“I wish to see Arthur. Your master. My Lord.”

“Your what?” Merlin choked.

“My heart's delight!” Vivian pushed past her.

“Oh, no,” she moaned.

“Where is he?”

“He's not here, which is a very good thing, I believe!” 

“Then I shall wait.”

“I don't think that's a good idea. You... You're not even dressed.”

“My love does not care what I wear, only that I am near. Now fetch him.”

“I cannot.”

“You will.”

“Shan't.”

“As he commands you, I command you!”

“I am asking you to leave.”

“I want my love. I need my love. I want to see him now.” Vivian climbed onto Arthur’s bed, pressed his pillow to her face and then buried her head in his blankets. Apparently today was clean the bed linens day. Who knew?

Merlin felt Arthur returning.

“Where is he?!” She heard Olaf bellow. Olaf was coming from one direction and Arthur from the other and Vivian was on Arthur’s bed in her nightgown. Merlin had to stop this from turning into a complete disaster. She whirled around and used magic to knock Vivian out. She dragged her across the room and stuffed her into Arthur’s wardrobe and closed the doors on her. She would most likely be fine.

Arthur came in. “Why are you hanging around with a bad smell? It's me who needs to bathe. I'm not going to win my love stinking like an old kipper.”

“No,” Merlin agreed absently, not moving.

Olaf stormed in, bellowing, “Where is he?! I know she's in here, Arthur! Hand her over! Or feel my wrath!” All of the Kings had followed him and Uther was eyeing Merlin with concern. She shook her head minutely. Uther relaxed just a fraction.

“What's he talking about?” Arthur asked. 

“She wasn't even dressed,” Trickler added.

“If I have dishonored you in some way, then, by all means, provide me with proof and I'll face the consequences.”

“Trickler here has told me that the Lady Vivian is in your chambers.”

“If only that were true…” Arthur said wistfully. Olaf grabbed the front of his shirt with both hands.

“Arthur!” Merlin snapped.

“I should not have said that,” he realized. “My apologies.”

“Arthur has been feeling a little out of sorts for the past few days, Sire,” Merlin added. “He didn’t mean any disrespect to you or your daughter, I’m certain.”

“No, of course not,” Arthur easily agreed. Olaf nodded reluctantly and let go of Arthur.

“Search the room! You better hope I don't find her.”

“Do you normally allow servants to speak so freely?” King James asked.

“Merlin is Arthur’s favorite most of the time. He allows the boy many freedoms.” Merlin locked the wardrobe door with a bit of magic.

“Oh! Poor boy, then, if Arthur’s turned his eyes to Vivian.”

“It wouldn’t be the first time,” Merlin said with a tight smile. Trickler tried to open the wardrobe. “That hasn't opened in years,” she lied. Uther’s eyes widened, but he quickly schooled his face before anyone else noticed.

Olaf grabbed Trickler. “You buffoon! You made an idiot out of me!” He shoved the sorcerer, who hurriedly left the room. Merlin could not blame him for that. Olaf turned awkwardly to Arthur to make his apologies. “I am,” he coughed, “So terribly sorry, Arthur, to have disturbed you. I... I do hope that you will forgive me.” Arthur waved off the apology. “Check on the Lady Vivian! And remain outside her room!” Olaf ordered the guards. They all left and the other Kings followed. Arthur thankfully went behind the screen to change for the bath she had not made yet. Merlin hurriedly got Vivian out of the wardrobe and carried her down the servant’s corridor to her own room and dropped her on the bed. She would wake up soon enough.

Merlin got back to her chores. The day passed smoothly enough with Arthur safely at Uther’s side all afternoon and soon the preparations were being made for the treaty signing feast. Merlin got Arthur ready and sent him off to Uther before hurrying back to Gaius’ to try to figure out which spell it was.

Unfortunately, Arthur was neither at the signing ceremony, nor back in his chambers when Merlin went in search of him. She ran to Vivian’s chambers in a panic, and flung the door open. Arthur and Vivian were furiously kissing and did not even notice her. Oh, Goddess! Merlin spoke the counter spell to no avail. She repeated it until the Kings stormed in.

“I tried…” Merlin said to Uther. “I did.”

“I’m sure you did,” Uther said sympathetically.

“Does your son usually behave in this manner?” King Rhys asked. “Bayard sang his praises.”

“I feared that my son might have been enchanted, but with no proof and my priorities with the treaty, I’m afraid we had no time to discover the culprit.”

“Olaf won’t care,” James warned.

“We’re aware,” Merlin said miserably. Olaf threw his glove down at Arthur’s feet. Everything went silent for a moment.

“Father!” Vivian protested.

“You once said that if you ever truly offended my honor, then you would happily pay the price. What say you now, Prince Arthur?”

“How have I offended your honor? Surely not with my love alone?!” Merlin covered her face with her hands.

“Poor boy has to be enchanted,” Rhys muttered. “You’re in her bedchambers alone and kissing her!”

“Love?! You don't know the first thing about love! You're taking advantage of an innocent girl!” Olaf was clearly enraged.

“Father,” Vivian tried to intercede.

“I assure you, my feelings for your daughter are as real as they are strong.” Uther groaned softly.

“Unhand her, or suffer the consequences. Is this really worth risking your life for?”

Vivian blinked up at Arthur, pouting a little, “Arthur?” 

“Indeed, it is. I would rather die than deny my feelings. I love your daughter with all my heart.” He kissed Vivian chastely, albeit on the lips, and picked up Olaf’s glove. Merlin sighed heavily. Uther groaned again. James and Rhys quickly made themselves scarce. Merlin and Uther dragged Arthur out of Vivian’s chambers and Olaf followed them to the door, shutting it on them.

“Arthur, have you taken leave of your senses?” Merlin asked.

“I really don’t know what I’m going to do with you,” Uther snapped. “It’s not like you have lots of younger brothers running around.”

“Does Vivian even have brothers? What about Olaf’s succession?”

“I think he does have a son or two,” Uther murmured. “But I only have one, and a fool idiot at that!”

They locked Arthur in his chambers with guards at the door. Merlin brought Arthur his supper and finished her nightly chores before going down to ask the dragon for help. Matters of the heart were always tricky, after all, and clearly she had not been able to do anything with her magic. The dragon was waiting when she got there, so she explained what the problem was.

“This is magic indeed.” The dragon laughed.

“Everything I have tried has failed.”

“From what you tell me, the spell has captured his heart.”

“And his heart is controlling his brain.”

“There is no magic that can break this enchantment.”

“There must be something!” Merlin could not let him go to his death or to war in the morning.

“It has too great a hold.”

“I cannot let Arthur die.”

“Patience, young warlock. The solution lies in a force greater than you or I can understand, a force that has puzzled many minds...” he paused, solely for dramatic effect, “...a force...”

“Just tell me!” Merlin exploded. The dragon laughed some more.

“Why, it is the greatest force of all: love.”

“Love?” He needed to be more specific.

“You must find the person Arthur truly loves.” Gwen.

“And then what?” What did Gwen need to do?

“One kiss from her will break the enchantment, and he will desire Vivian no more,” the dragon assured her. Good. She just had to find Gwen and convince her to kiss Arthur before the duel tomorrow. Merlin thanked the dragon and hurried back up the stairs to Morgana’s chambers, but Morgana had already sent Gwen home and she thought Lancelot was meeting her and Merlin was not going to ask Gwen to kiss Arthur with Lancelot standing there. It could wait until the morning. The fight would not start until noon, after all.

The next morning, Arthur refused to let anyone else put him in his armor. He was adamant about it. So Merlin didn’t have time to start looking for Gwen until right before the tournament. She finally cornered her in Morgana’s chambers.

“Ah, Gwen! There you are!”

“Here I am?” Gwen agreed with understandable confusion.

“Okay, you know about the challenge and the Vivian and all that?”

“What does this have to do with me?”

“Arthur’s been enchanted.”

“Oh! Have you told Uther?”

“The day before yesterday. Olaf doesn’t care. We can’t get Arthur back to normal. But if he kisses someone that he does love, he should go back to normal.”

“Why did you hunt me down?” Gwen asked warily.

“Because you’re the last person Arthur was interested in. You know I’m not really his favorite and he hasn’t kissed anyone since you to my knowledge.”

“But Lancelot’s formally courting me!”

“Gwen, he’s going to die! There will be war!”

“I cannot betray Lancelot.”

“That’s all very good and noble, but you really need to think about the broader consequences of this. Give me a name of someone you think Arthur loves and I’ll leave you alone, but it has to be someone who you honestly believe Arthur loves enough to break him out of an enchantment.” Gwen was silent.

“I don’t know of anyone,” she admitted. “I’ve thought once or twice that he cared for you that way, but you would surely know if he did.”

“He’s made no intimations of the sort,” Merlin agreed. “Unless you count saving my life with the witch finder.”

“No, you were innocent. Arthur would have been outraged for anyone in that position,” Gwen agreed. “But I cannot kiss another man when I’ve accepted Lancelot’s courtship.”

“It is not that kind of kiss,” Merlin protested.

“It’s worse. I’m confirming that he loves me that much.”

“Will you please just come down to the tournament field with me?” Merlin asked. “Just to see what you’re actually saying.”

“Fine,” Gwen agreed. They went down to the tournament field together, just in time for the match to start. At first, Arthur was doing well. “See? He’ll be fine.” Then Arthur caught sight of Vivian and lost all sense of the match. Olaf hit him in the knees and Arthur crashed to the ground hard. He had almost recovered his footing when Olaf broke his quarterstaff and knocked him hard. Arthur managed to recover enough to hold out until the first time was up.

“Do you see? This isn’t a fair fight. Arthur can’t focus.”

“He’s doing fine,” Gwen insisted. “And I cannot do that to Lancelot. He’s too honorable.”

“You’re going to doom us all,” Merlin grumbled, stalking off to Arthur’s tent. Gaius was hovering over him worriedly.

“His ribs are broken!” Gaius whispered to her urgently. “Where’s Gwen?”

“Refusing to betray Lancelot,” Merlin grumbled back. “Let’s just get his ribs set first. The challenge will go on whether or not Gwen decides to save us all from certain war.” Gaius agreed. Between the two of them they managed to get his ribs bound to keep them from getting worse and they got him back into his armor. Unfortunately, there was only minutes between bouts and by the time Merlin got back to Gwen, Arthur was facing off against Olaf again.

“This is the mace, it’s Arthur’s forte, he’ll do well,” Gwen said firmly.

“He has two broken ribs,” Merlin told her. Uther started the match. Olaf quickly took the advantage. There was a loud buzzing of horrified whispers.

“What’s wrong with Arthur?”

“He has to be hurt!”

“I haven’t seen him lose so badly since he was a boy!”

“Arthur’s not going to make it!”

“This will mean war, I’m certain of it.”

“He’s really not doing well,” Merlin commented to Gwen. Even as Arthur crashed to his knees again, he glanced over to Vivian.

“Is he mad?” someone demanded nearby. The time was running down, but not fast enough. Arthur was struggling to get to his feet and Olaf was circling around to at least take him down from the front. The last grain of sand ran out before Olaf could swing.

“Time!” Uther screamed over the loud gasps of nearly everyone in the stands. They all sighed in relief.

“He’s truly going to die,” Gwen finally realized.

“What have I been saying?” Merlin grumbled.

“I’ll kiss him,” she agreed. They both hurried out of the stands and met Arthur in his tent. Merlin kept Gaius outside while Gwen took a deep breath and strode confidently in.

“Ah, Gwen, have you come to wish me good luck? I’m not sure I need it anymore.”

“She’s agreed?”

“Finally realized he’d die if she didn’t,” Merlin told him.

“Back in my day, if someone asked you to kiss someone to get them free from an enchantment, you didn’t wait until it was clear they were in mortal peril,” Gaius grumbled. Gwen came back out. They both rushed in.

“How are you feeling?” Merlin immediately asked. “Your ribs?”

“Broken?” Arthur asked.

“Yes, Sire,” Gaius agreed. “But Vivian? You aren’t enchanted?”

“This is about Vivian?” Arthur exclaimed. He winced at the strain it put on his ribs.

“This is about Alined wanting war because it would take too long to build his wealth back up in peace. He enchanted you and Vivian because Olaf was the easiest to anger. But you’re losing, Arthur.”

“I never lose,” Arthur assured her.

“Please don’t start now,” Gaius begged.

“You have to live, for Camelot. You wrote half of those letters trying to get this peace treaty established and if you die, your father will declare war on Olaf and all that work will be completely wasted.”

“I won’t let that happen,” Arthur put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “Give me my sword. I’ll win, and I’ll spare Olaf. We’ll have peace, Merlin, I promise you that.”

“If you break that promise, I’m learning necromancy so I can bring you back to life and kill you myself,” Merlin warned, half serious.

“You have to get back to the field,” Gaius interrupted. Arthur nodded briskly.

“No learning black magicks,” he ordered. Arthur managed to stride out onto the field with some dignity, though everyone could see he was in pain. The spectators were still all whispering to each other but Merlin was on the ground with Gaius and couldn’t hear them.

“Please, Goddess, let him win,” she whispered. “Please, just let him live.”

“Please, Goddess,” Gaius echoed her quietly. “Please help him.”

The last match began. Arthur was clearly forcing himself through the pain, but he was at last using his strategy. He could still move a little faster than Olaf and he used it to his advantage. Finally, Arthur pinned Olaf, sword point to his chest. He slowly rose and then purposefully dropped his sword to his side.

“This is no way to achieve peace!” he pronounced loudly. He offered Olaf his hand, and Olaf levered himself to his feet.

Thankfully, Olaf was impressed enough with Arthur that he listened when Uther explained that he believed that Arthur, and possibly also Vivian, had been enchanted by some sorcerer in an effort to sabotage the peace treaty. All the Kings signed at a late dinner ceremony and then started to return home. Olaf wanted Vivian home safe as soon as possible and Alined wanted to sulk and nurse his wounds and James and Rhys were not eager to court more of Uther’s bad luck.

Arthur was excused from all of this by the fact he had possibly two broken ribs and Gaius had ordered him to bed rest. After a more thorough investigation, Gaius was pleased to announce that Arthur’s ribs were not actually broken, though he had probably bruised them and would be sore and stiff for a few days.

“So… how did you convince Gwen to kiss me?” Arthur asked once Gaius had left them alone.

“Well, you were dying and it was going to mean war and she was really entirely too stubborn about the whole thing. I’m sure Lancelot would rather we not go to war.”

“Must have stung that yours didn’t work, huh?” Arthur said teasingly.

“What?” Merlin asked. “My what didn’t work?” Did he know about her magic? How could he know?

“Your kiss,” Arthur rolled his eyes. “Idiot.”

“Oh, I didn’t kiss you,” Merlin scoffed. “I know it wouldn’t have done any good so why bother?”

“I am the Crown Prince of Camelot. Most people throw themselves at my feet,” Arthur said haughtily. Merlin rolled her eyes.

“I think that’s only in your dreams, Arthur,” she told him. “You should get some rest. It’ll help your ribs heal faster. I can fix and polish your armor in Gaius’ chambers.”

“Thank you,” Arthur agreed. Merlin carted the armor to Gaius’ chambers.

Arthur did not want to rest. He wanted someone else to explain the mess in his head for him. It was at times like this that he really wished that he had a mother to talk to. His father was not the most openly caring man and Morgana was not someone to confide in. She would laugh in his face. But he certainly could not confide in any of the servants, because they might not be trustworthy and though Arthur trusted Merlin, Merlin was a large part of his confusion and therefore not the one he should be speaking to. Arthur slowly made his way to his father’s chambers. Rollins let him in.

“Sire, Arthur is here.” His father turned and beckoned him in.

“I’m sorry for the trouble I caused.”

“Well, the treaty still got signed and you were enchanted. I will not fault you for that. Though I will be most pleased to watch Alined flounder on his own trying to save his wealth.”

“Father!” Arthur chided in shock.

“Well, it was most likely him who enchanted you, especially given that display with his fool during their departure. Besides, we have plenty of other allies wealthy in trade to rely on. And perhaps Alined shall be unable to hold his kingdom and we can take it. I would like more land, especially on a coastline. It would facilitate trade with King Olaf.” Arthur nodded. This was all good.

“There was something I wanted your advice about, Father. Can we speak privately?”

“Of course,” he nodded. Rollins obediently left without even needing to be told. “What is it, son?”

“I’m a mess,” Arthur grumbled. “I don’t even know where to start.”

“Well, the beginning is typically a good place.”

“Um, Merlin isn’t really my favorite. He hasn’t shared my bed, not in the sense everyone thinks. But…”

“You are very fond of the boy,” his father nodded encouragingly.

“I made an advance and he rejected it because I pay his salary. But I can’t fire him just because I want to sleep with him. He’d be even more dependent on me. And I don’t understand him.”

“He seems like a simple country boy, if a little more loyal and brave than most. What’s not to understand?”

“You know how Gaius told you that a kiss broke the enchantment? Merlin didn’t even try to kiss me himself. He just went and got the last servant girl I made advances towards and convinced her to kiss me. Who does that?”

“I can see your confusion.”

“And when I mentioned that I had assumed that he had tried, he acted like the thought had literally never occurred to him.”

“Gaius did say that the kiss had to be from love,” his father suggested. “Perhaps he assumed it was love between a man and a woman?”

“I suppose,” Arthur shrugged. “I’m just so confused. I don’t know what to do with him.”

“Do you care for him?”

“Yes.”

“Does he care for you?”

“I…” Arthur sighed. “I’m not sure. I mean, why else would you drink poison for someone? But then, shouldn’t he have been jealous? I may have played up my interest in the servant girl, to see how he’d react, and nothing.”

“Arthur!” his father chided.

“I kissed Morgana’s serving maid and then we had to rescue her or Morgana was going to skin me and I hadn’t slept in two days because I really didn’t think there was any way she’d still be alive. She was worthless to them. If I came back without her, Morgana would have slit my throat in my sleep, I was sure of it. And I wasn’t thinking clearly and Merlin was just following along and it was a grueling pace and he was barely even complaining and I wasn’t thinking and I started babbling things that were true about him as though they were true about her and he didn’t react!” All the words came tumbling out and his father sat for a moment, thinking everything over.

“I’m assuming Morgana doesn’t know you kissed her maid.”

“She doesn’t seem to,” Arthur agreed. “I am quite certain I would have heard about it.”

“She’s being courted by your peasant knight, isn’t she?” Arthur nodded in confirmation. “No wonder it took her so long to kiss you. I suppose I can understand how you thought that jealousy would be a good indicator with little sleep, but that’s not always the best way to tell.”

“Isn’t it?”

“No, because some people love selflessly. They aren’t possessive. They would rather that the object of their affection be happy than anything else, including being with them.”

“That might describe Merlin,” Arthur agreed. “He’s an idiot that way.”

“Well, then,” his father smiled at him. “All cleared up.”

“But how do I woo him? I doubt he wants flowers.”

“You must simply find out what the boy does want, within reason, and give it to him. By the by, if you’re going to set the boy up as your consort, I would like to be made aware of his ambitions as soon as possible. Does he have family he will want provided for? Will he have expensive taste? I would like to be able to plan for these things.”

“Um, he only has his mother and she’s a simple woman. He already provides for her with what he’s paid now. I doubt she would want to leave her home, but that’s only one person if she does want to stay in the castle. I don’t think he’ll have expensive taste, though I’ll have to do something about his wardrobe. He doesn’t own anything nice enough for my consort.”

“So I’ll plan for a new wardrobe,” his father agreed. “And one simple peasant woman shouldn’t affect anything too much if she does come to stay. Just find out what sorts of ambitions the boy has early. You don’t want to discover something expensive, like he wants to be a proper Lord with his own territory and castle, once it’s too late to change his mind.”

“Yes, father,” Arthur nodded. Find out what Merlin wanted, what would make him happy. Surely Arthur could do that without too much trouble. “Thank you for your advice.”

“I am glad to help,” he smiled. “I know I am not always the most obvious with my affection, but you are my son and I love you. I will always give you advice if you wish it.”

“I love you too,” Arthur said awkwardly. They were not words he was used to using. There was not normally anyone to say them to. “I should get some rest. Gaius said I was just bruised but apparently you heal faster while you sleep.”

“Then get some rest, son.” Arthur headed slowly back to his own chambers. He could rest before Merlin inevitably came with the supper tray. Then he could start trying to figure out what Merlin wanted and then it would be easy to give it to him. He was the Crown Prince after all.


	10. The Crystal of Neahtid

Merlin had been looking forward to getting a nice, long sleep. Arthur would not be doing anything strenuous like patrol or training for the next few days and he would likely be excused from council as well while he recovered. Of course, his bad luck meant that they had a new problem. Merlin woke up in the middle of the night, hearing Mordred in her head, directing some man to Morgana’s chambers. As she woke up enough to understand the fragments of instructions she was hearing, the alarm rang out. Merlin bolted out of bed and tripped into her trousers as she scrambled out of Gaius’ chambers and down the stairs into courtyard and then up into the main part of the castle to try to intercept whoever Mordred was leading to Morgana.

“Who on Earth have you brought?” Merlin demanded but Mordred couldn’t hear her. She skidded around the corner and suddenly there was a hand around her throat and her feet were dangling in the air.

“Merlin?!” Arthur smiled with relief. Merlin smiled back, tugging at his arm. Arthur made a sheepish expression and hurriedly let her down.

“What are you doing? You have bruised ribs!” Merlin chided.

“Later,” Arthur snapped, “Where are you going?”

“Morgana’s. I heard her name, I think. Through my window, maybe?” Arthur paled.

“Come on!” Arthur immediately led them towards Morgana’s chambers. Merlin could still hear Mordred.

“Here we are,” Mordred announced. Merlin winced. Who was in Morgana’s chambers?

“From now on, if you think you hear someone going to attack Morgana, come get me first before you get yourself killed,” Arthur grumbled.

“Can you even fight with bruised ribs?” Merlin countered. Arthur glared at her. Soon enough they reached Morgana’s chambers. They listened at the door. Both of them could hear a man speaking inside. Arthur kicked the door in but there was no one to be seen except Morgana in bed.

“What on earth do you think you're doing?!

“I'd reason to believe that there was an intruder in here,” Arthur replied.

“Right now, Arthur, the only intruder is you.”

“I heard a man’s voice just now in here,” Arthur told her. Morgana said nothing.

“Are you certain that there’s no one here, Morgana?” Merlin asked. “The intruders killed the guards.”

“They killed the sentries and the guards on the drawbridge and Leon is in Gaius’ chambers with a bad stomach wound,” Arthur took up her line of thinking. “Did you not hear the warning bell?”

“Of course I did! I was hoping I'd be safe in my chambers.”

“Well, if you'd just permit me to search your room...”

“You'll do no such thing! Arthur, do you think that if there was someone in my room I wouldn't know about it?”

“Morgana, we’re just concerned. If there’s no one here, then what’s the trouble?” Merlin countered. Morgana was hiding someone and a grown man convincing a child whose name was in a prophecy for murder to lead him to a woman’s bedchambers in the middle of the night was not someone she was inclined to trust blindly. Of course, Morgana could give no response. Mordred crawled under the bed. Merlin checked there and Arthur rolled his eyes when she told him there was no one there. The grown man was less lucky. He darted out from behind a screen, Morgana screamed, he ran for the servant’s door and the guards, with Arthur, followed.

“How did you know?” Morgana asked, looking upset. Mordred climbed out from under the bed.

“Who gave you to Alvarr?” Merlin demanded harshly. “Who?”

“I couldn’t find Iseldir. I found Alvarr instead. He took me in.” Merlin took a shaky breath.

“He’s a murderer that no self-respecting Druid acknowledges as kin. You should be glad he could not stay longer, Morgana. Goddess only knows why he needed to come to your bedchamber in the middle of the night.” Morgana paled. Clearly she had not thought of the first thing that had come to Merlin’s mind.

“He wanted her to get a Seer’s crystal out of Uther’s vaults,” Mordred explained. “I thought that would be alright.”

“Which crystal?”

“The crystal of Neahtid.”

“What could he possibly need that for? Alvarr is no Seer.”

“Um…” Mordred shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know why he needed it and yet you were prepared to die for it?” Merlin shook her head. “You’re going straight back Iseldir, lytling. I’d put you over my knee and give you a good what for if I thought it would knock any sense into your head. What was the point of you learning to speak with your mind if you don’t listen? You could have found your way back easily.”

“I should have thought of that,” Mordred agreed. “I was just scared.”

“I know you were scared, but you have to be brave when you’re scared so you can keep yourself safe. And no more bringing anyone to see Morgana, especially in the middle of the night.”

“Merlin, he’s only a child.” Morgana pulled Mordred into her arms.

“He’s eleven. That’s old enough to start keeping a smart head on his shoulders.” Merlin went and closed the door to the servant’s hallway and then crossed back to drop a kiss on Mordred’s head. “You behave.”

“Yes, Merlin,” Mordred agreed. “I’m sorry I scared you.”

“Thank you,” Morgana said. “For not…”

“As you said, he’s only a child.” Merlin pulled the door shut behind her as she left. Hopefully the guards would either run Alvarr down or out of the citadel. Either one would be an acceptable solution. Then, hopefully, Morgana would not try to get the crystal for him. Merlin went back to bed. Gaius was still sleeping. She was quite jealous.

She was tired the next morning and so was Arthur. Alvarr had escaped so Arthur had gotten even less sleep than she had. After breakfast, she ordered him back to bed. Merlin took her time doing her chores and was as quiet as possible, so she wouldn’t disturb Arthur. That afternoon, Arthur insisted on getting up and going to training. Merlin did not bother to argue with him. He was clearly going to get his way no matter what. Besides, it had rained that morning. He should be safe enough. She saw Morgana at the end of the corridor when she came back from doing the laundry, but did not give much thought to it. At least, she did not worry about it, until the warning bells rang out during Arthur’s supper. They abandoned the food to discover that there had been a theft in the vaults. Merlin went white.

“What?” Arthur asked in an undertone.

Merlin answered in a whisper. “Um, the man who was in Morgana’s chambers, he wanted her to help him get something out of the vaults.”

“Oh, god, he must have left the citadel, right?”

“Well, I certainly hope so.” They continued down to the vaults in silence.

“The locks are undamaged,” Arthur noticed.

“Sorcery?” Merlin asked.

“Someone stole my keys,” Arthur growled. “Did you see anyone in my chambers?”

“No, but I thought I saw Morgana turning the corner when I came back with your laundry while you were at training. I dismissed it.”

“I am certain Morgana could not have been involved,” Arthur said firmly. “There was no one else you saw?”

“No, but I wasn’t in your rooms all day. Someone could have been there without my knowledge.”

“I’m certainly not going to hold you responsible,” Arthur said reassuringly. “It seems whoever it was knew exactly what they wanted. They disturbed almost nothing except the Crystal of Neahtid.” Merlin followed Arthur back up to the council chambers, where Uther was waiting.

“What was stolen?”

“The Crystal of Neahtid. Whoever it was knew exactly what they wanted and the locks were undamaged. Either someone stole my keys or perhaps it was a sorcerer.”

“Such a powerful artefact cannot be allowed to fall into enemy hands!”

“If I may…” Merlin said quietly.

“Yes, Merlin?”

“The Crystal is a Seer’s artefact. It can show the past and possible futures but I do not think it has much function as a weapon.”

“It could show them our plans,” Uther countered. Merlin nodded. That it could. She hadn’t really thought of that. She was not a Seer, after all. “We must find it. It must be recovered without delay.”

“But all we know is that the intruder from yesterday was named Alvarr, and we cannot know if he is actually related to this crime.”

“Alvarr must be,” Uther snarled. “That coward.”

“He’s usually in the Valley of Chemray this time of year,” Merlin offered. “The other Druids refuse to allow him to follow the old paths with them so he camps counter-seasons.”

“Then you shall look there first. Arthur, gather a group of your finest knights and entrust them with this task. Impress upon them the importance of recovering the crystal.”

“I will lead the knights, Father. I am not that badly injured.”

“You will fall back if there is trouble. I only have one son.”

“Yes, Father,” Arthur agreed, bowing his head in deference.

“Good. Leave at first light.”

They went to make preparations. Arthur went to inform the knights of the plans and Merlin went to his chambers to pack his saddlebags and lay out his armor. Arthur got back about the time Merlin had finished and was going to leave for the night. Arthur had her fetch supper for them both and then pulled her down into bed with him. He made a horrific noise as she stumbled into his and let go of her. Merlin quickly shifted so her weight was not leaning on his ribs.

“Come here,” Arthur grumpily ordered. Merlin obliged, climbing into bed. “You’ll sleep better here. So don’t say I never do anything for you when you have to get on a horse first thing in the morning.”

“Thank you,” she mumbled, falling quickly asleep. Arthur woke her up the next morning. It was still dark, but Merlin felt more rested than if she had slept in her own bed. They ate a quick breakfast, with no bacon, and then they were meeting the knights in the courtyard and taking the horses from yawning stable hands. They set out for the Valley of Chemray, with Merlin having to lead the way.

“Not to overstep, but I’m a little surprised,” Leon said once they were a good ways out of the citadel.

“About what?”

“Well, you were upset about the Druid boy last spring. I wouldn’t have thought you would have offered information about a Druid camp to the King.”

“Alvarr is not a Druid. He is a murderer.” Merlin felt her face contort with her displeasure. “No one approves of him or his methods. It would not be evil for him to be executed.”

“Wow,” Caradoc, one of the newest knights, the one who had been knighted only a fortnight before when Morgause had challenged Arthur, said. “Does your manservant always speak so openly of his association with sorcerers?”

“Merlin is Arthur’s favorite, you imbecile,” Ewan hissed.

“Merlin was raised in Essetir. As everyone is aware, King Cenred has very different views to my father on magic. Therefore, Merlin spent the first seventeen years of his life accumulating knowledge that was considered normal in Essetir but would be treasonous had he lived in Camelot at the time. Besides, it’s Druids, not sorcerers.”

“Every Druid must take a vow of passivity. Even if they are attacked, they cannot retaliate even to save their own lives. Druids are peaceful.”

“They can’t fight back to save their own lives?” Ewan gasped.

“No, they cannot,” Merlin shook her head. “That’s why the Catha exist. They don’t travel together like the other Druidic tribes do. They roam around. At one point, there was a few Catha that travelled in every Druid tribe to protect them from attack because the Druids take those vows young, so the only ones who could fight back would be children.” Leon made a strange face and Arthur cleared his throat loudly.

“Merlin, change the subject if you insist on babbling.”

“It’s entirely too cold for this,” she said. That was a subject change. Arthur chuckled.

“Want a cloak?”

“No, I do not want to possibly lose your cloak because your shoulders are broader than mine and never hear the end of it.” Arthur laughed.

“Merlin has a point. Why did they have to choose to wait until after Samhain?” Ewan complained. “Or couldn’t this have waited until Spring?”

“Alvarr is pure evil,” Merlin grumbled.

“Have you ever even met this man?” Arthur asked.

“No, but I’ve heard plenty of stories,” Merlin replied. “He was the one that played cat and mouse with Uther during the Purge. Almost all of the retaliations for the sorcerers dying were Alvarr- crops burned, villages razed. He’s horrible. Besides, he snuck into Morgana’s chambers and she didn’t even realize he was there. Who knows what he was thinking?”

“She’s lucky you got there so quickly,” Leon agreed. “She could have been killed or worse.” They came to a fork in the road.

“Well, Merlin, which way?” Merlin eyed both paths for a minute. She really wasn’t sure. She had never had cause to actually go to the Valley of Chemray before. She closed her eyes and listened intently.

“Morgana…”

“…the crystal is here…”

“Stop flirting!” The camp was along the left fork.

“That way,” she pointed. Arthur nodded and led the way.

“Now, these men are not under any vows of passivity.”

“No, they will attack with everything they have,” Merlin agreed. “Everyone should be very careful. Alvarr was willing to die to get that crystal. He is not going to want to give it back.”

“Yes, Alvarr came into Camelot and risked his life, staying in the citadel for quite a while to get that crystal. Recovering it is our first priority, remember that.” They came upon the camp that afternoon. It was instant pandemonium. Alvarr’s men saw or heard the knights and ran to attack them. Arthur’s men attacked back. Arthur and Merlin hung back. Merlin dismounted and ran into the camp, following Mordred’s magic. He had the crystal.

“Mordred, give me the crystal and run north. Iseldir isn’t far.”

“I didn’t…”

“I know. Run to Iseldir. He will protect you.”

“I’m sorry!” Mordred handed her the crystal, which was wrapped in silk. He ran out of the camp, thankfully without catching any of the knights’ eyes. Merlin turned to find Arthur standing just behind her.

“He’s only a child.”

“It’s fine, Merlin,” Arthur said. “I’m assuming that’s why they stopped by Morgana’s chambers.”

“Yeah, Mordred was under the bed,” Merlin admitted.

“Well, we have the crystal.” Arthur took the bundle from her and led the way quickly back to the horses. He called out to his men. Thankfully, though some of the knights were wounded, none had fallen in the short battle. They took the camp and shackled Alvarr and his followers. Merlin had little sympathy for them. At this point, there was no excuse for not knowing his reputation and they had chosen to follow him anyway. As the sun was already setting, they simply took advantage of the camp Alvarr’s band had made. They could ride back in the morning.

Merlin shied away from the crystal. Even wrapped in the silk, its magic called to her. Alvarr had to be gagged to keep him from yelling about how they had no use for it as none of them could use it. Merlin was a little concerned for his sanity. He certainly should have noticed her magic.

“Merlin, guard the crystal,” Arthur ordered, settling down by the campfire she had claimed. 

What? No, give it to Leon,” Merlin said without thinking.

“Does it scare you?” Arthur asked quietly. “I thought you were indifferent to sorcery.”

“I just don’t like that crystal. And I willingly admit that Alvarr frightens me.” Arthur nodded.

“Leon, come here!” Leon obediently rushed over. “Guard the crystal. I need my sleep and Merlin’s afraid of Alvarr.”

“Yes, Sire,” Leon agreed. Merlin felt much better when the crystal left her immediate proximity. Arthur shook his head at her, but he was smiling fondly.

“Come here.” Merlin shuffled over. Arthur pulled her down. “It’s too cold.”

“Didn’t I say that this morning?” Merlin agreed. Arthur nodded.

“Go to sleep.”

The next morning, they woke early and left before dawn. There were only a few of Alvarr’s band that had survived the night. Several had been severely wounded and died overnight and quite a few had fallen in the battle. Thankfully, the knights had been better cared for and they all rode back to Camelot. Alvarr and his few followers were brought before Uther for a short trial. Uther, of course, found them guilty. Alvarr had the decency or the good sense not to implicate Morgana. Morgana shouted something dreadful at Uther afterwards and was confined to her chambers. Merlin felt a little strange around the edges all day, the crystal still calling to her even from the vaults. Also, the hunting dogs’ kennel was apparently not fit for winter and all the dogs were brought into the castle, large hounds loping through the halls and barking loudly. It was both painfully loud and disconcerting. It did not help her sensitivity to the crystal at all.

That night someone drugged the guards and Alvarr escaped. The warning bell was raised far too late. Uther made a horrific face as Morgana walked into the council chamber while he was speaking to Arthur about how Alvarr must have had help. He knew she had done it. Of course, he said nothing. Uther did love Morgana. Merlin thought that some sort of long talk about Alvarr’s actions during the Purge was in order, but no one asked for her opinion.


	11. The Vessel

Two days later, fires were reported in Idirsholas. It was an abandoned fortress that had belonged to the Old Religion but was less than a day’s ride south of the citadel. Uther gathered a group of the knights he had ridden with during the Purge, those who had faced down sorcerers and survived. It took a lot of arguing on Arthur’s part, and lying through his teeth about how much better he felt already, before Uther agreed to let him lead the knights. They rode out to the fortress late that afternoon and had to camp overnight. Arthur kept Merlin close, especially after they made camp. He did not trust Uther’s older knights as much as his younger knights to respect Merlin.

They entered the fortress the next morning, to discover that the story about the Knights of Mendhir seemed to be true on some level. There were knights in black armor that blocked the entrance once they had entered. The knights of Camelot tried to fight back, but the knights of Mendhir were wraiths. They could not fall. Merlin managed to drag Arthur out of the fortress and back out to the horses, caving the ceiling in as they went to slow their pursuers but he was the only one she managed to save. They rode back to Camelot like their lives depended on it.

Merlin had known on some level that it couldn’t go on forever. She may have been born with her powers and she may have been far more powerful than the average, but even she did not have unlimited powers. When she and Arthur rode back into Camelot, to warn that the knights of Mendhir were indeed risen, it was the point of no return. As they searched through the palace for someone not asleep, she could feel the pull of the spell on the citadel. Finally, they stumbled upon Morgana, awake and alert. Gaius was a sorcerer, born with no True Talent, but a latent ability to master spells. But Morgana had the same True Talent that Merlin had been born with. Merlin smiled in her mind, hope restored, as she lied to Arthur about medicines and Gaius to keep him from worrying overmuch about why Morgana was still awake. It would not do to force Arthur to choose between his father, the king, and magic yet. He did not fully trust it and Morgause had not helped. But eventually, Merlin felt her succumbing to the spell as much as Arthur was. She pitched her voice low and angled away from Arthur.

“Morgana, do you have any idea who did this?” she asked. “Because I don’t think our first theory about why you’re immune is panning out.”

“What are you talking about?” Morgana asked. “It’s not like there’s anyone else in the citadel to compare to.” Merlin rolled her eyes but held her tongue. It would be obvious soon enough. Her magic would unravel the boy’s body she had made for herself to stay safe on the road before it let her fall unconscious in another’s spell.

“What are you two whispering about?” Arthur demanded. “Do either one of you have a plan?”

“We need something that can kill the dead…” Merlin replied with the shrug. Then she slowly blinked. The sword forged in dragon’s fire could kill the dead. “Actually, I know where that weapon is.”

“What?!” Morgana and Arthur exclaimed together.

“Oh, you didn’t honestly think you can kill a wraith with a normal sword?” Merlin scoffed. “It’s not here anymore though.”

“Oh, my sword,” Arthur mumbled, clearly feeling a little silly that he had forgotten. Merlin could not blame him for the lapse, though, as he had to be feeling the effects of whatever this spell was even more than she was.

“How far is it?” Morgana asked, shooting a confused look at Arthur.

“Walking, a few hours each way,” Merlin told her. The lake was close enough to Camelot that Merlin had made it there and back overnight on foot more than once.

“We should take Father and go get my sword. We could probably make it back with hard riding in only an hour or two,” Arthur decided. “I doubt servants unconscious under an enchantment would be in too much danger from the knights of Mendhir if they do arrive before we return. They were knights, after all, and probably won’t attack someone who isn’t even conscious.” Merlin and Morgana both agreed, and all three of them carried Uther down to the courtyard. Merlin finagled Uther onto the horse Arthur had ridden, tying him on so he wouldn’t fall and re-buckling the harness so there was a lead rope from the reins, while Arthur and Morgana hurriedly readied their own mounts. Arthur took up the impromptu lead rope on his father’s horse and Morgana led the way out of the citadel. Merlin reluctantly overtook her, since she was the only one to have made this journey while conscious. Arthur had been enchanted in some manner by that damned Sidhe and then still unconscious from the drowning.

“Where are we going?” Morgana asked.

“The Lake of Avalon, where Sophia drowned Arthur,” Merlin answered without thinking. There was a palpable silence behind her.

“But, you said…” Morgana protested. “And he’s fine.”

“Oh, yes, and I was definitely going to tell you that Sophia and Aulfric were Sidhe that had been banished and were trying to drown Arthur so Sophia could have her banishment lifted and I had to kill both of them to get him back and he was almost dead anyway,” Merlin snapped.

“Where do you come up with these stories?” Arthur demanded irritably. He clearly had not wanted her to tell Morgana about that. Merlin just rolled her eyes, directing her horse a little to the left. Despite having left the citadel, Merlin was not feeling any better. A glance behind her said that Uther was still out cold and Arthur was flushed with exertion, when he had done less today than usual. Please let that flush not be from fever! She urged her horse to go faster. As it had thrice before, the lake suddenly loomed before her, dense trees suddenly giving way to a large clearing. Merlin fought back memories of bringing Freya here to lay her to rest and made herself focus.

“Why is the sword here?” Morgana asked.

“Because no one is going to look for a sword that can kill the dead here,” Merlin replied simply. She swung off the horse and waded out into the water, swimming farther into the depths once it was too deep to walk. After a few dives, she felt a familiar hand press the sword into her grasp. Thank you Freya, she thought emphatically at the spirit and quickly swam back to the surface for air. Arthur was already half-way to meeting her and Merlin let herself take advantage of his strength once she’d reached him.

“That’s a very striking sword,” Morgana murmured. “May I?” Merlin handed it over while Arthur herded her back to the horse.

“It isn’t rusted,” Arthur marveled, his first real look at the sword since he had killed Freya with it. “Is this where you’ve always kept it?”

“It can kill the dead and you think it would rust?” Merlin asked incredulously. “And yes, it is.”

“I suppose not,” Arthur agreed. He took the sword from Morgana as they all got back on their horses. They rode hard for Camelot and somehow just barely beat the Knights of Mendhir back to the castle. Everyone was awake. Merlin and Arthur still felt like death and Uther was unconscious. Morgana’s eyes went wide. Merlin slid off the horse and pulled Morgana with her into the stable, since Arthur was thankfully distracted with the arriving Knights.

“Did you go see Morgause last night?” Merlin demanded.

“I had no idea she was…” Morgana stammered.

“You’re the vessel for the spell,” Merlin told her. It was the only thing that made sense.

“But how do we stop it?”

“I don’t know,” Merlin muttered.

“Merlin!” Morgana looked terrified.

“You destroy the vessel to end a spell like this. But I don’t want to kill you.” Merlin was too tired, too worn to dissemble. Morgana stumbled back from Merlin, shaking her head. She turned and ran out the door. Merlin had no energy to follow. She fell into the hay, exhausted. The spells on her appearance unraveled without her consent, all of her power going to fighting the spell Morgause had cast. She knew Arthur was a good warrior and with the sword burnished in dragon’s fire, he would not fail. Morgause had to have some sort of long term plan beyond the spell. It would lift and she would change her appearance into a man’s again and do whatever she must then. Slowly, the world went dark.


	12. Magic Reveal

“Merlin!” Arthur’s voice was quiet but desperate. “Merlin, wake up, now!” Merlin blinked awake, confused, staring up at Arthur’s worried face. She seemed to be cradled in his arms, still in the stables if she could trust the smell. “Merlin, you have to look like you again. We can discuss this later, but hurry!” Merlin nodded absently. She felt sluggish, too tired to reply, but her magic sprang to her fingertips as easily as always. Merlin felt the spells that turned her into a boy snap into place and Arthur shifted her around to make the way he was supporting her comfortable again.

“Arthur?” Merlin mumbled. She wasn’t really sure what had happened.

“I killed the knights of Mendhir with the sword you gave me. Morgause showed up not long after they did. She’d put a spell on Morgana, something about a vessel. Father was livid. That’s why everyone was asleep except Morgana. But Morgause was afraid of the sword and took the spell off.” Alright, but how had Arthur decided the danger was gone enough to be sitting here, waking her up?

“Morgause… left?” Merlin managed to ask.

“Yes. She magicked herself out of the courtyard. The knights, of Camelot, of course, are out looking for her,” Arthur reassured her. Merlin struggled to sit up under her own power, and Arthur helped, hands out to catch her if she fell. Then his eyes widened. “Did Morgana see you like that? She said she’d left you here.”

Merlin felt better enough to give a full response, “No, she ran before that. I told her that to stop a spell like the one Morgause cast that you have to destroy the vessel. Since Morgana was the vessel…”

“I can understand why she ran. Alright, can we get you up to my chambers? Why are you still weak?”

“My magic was fighting off Morgause’s,” Merlin answered in a whisper. She knew better than to speak audibly. In castles, there could always be someone in hearing distance. “Since I was born with it, it just reacts. And I get tired with this kind of exertion.” Arthur nodded.

“Alright, up you get. You hit your head on the wall when you succumbed to the spell.”

“That’s why I feel awful?” Merlin asked.

Arthur nodded emphatically. “That’s the story we give anyone who asks.” He got into a crouch and helped Merlin to her feet, putting a supporting arm around her waist once they were standing. They crossed the courtyard and made their way up to Arthur’s chambers with a minimal of conversation. They passed Gwen, who Arthur sent for Gaius for Merlin’s head, and a few guards, who didn’t ask why Merlin needed help walking, just winced in sympathy. One of the other servants, a kitchen maid named Awena, asked in horror what had happened to Merlin and nearly fainted when Arthur answered her with their story. Merlin grinned once she had scurried along. She was a gossip.

“Well, the story will be all over the castle and lower town by nightfall,” Merlin murmured. “Awena loves to talk.”

“More than you?”

“I know how to keep secrets,” Merlin grumbled. Arthur almost protested but then said nothing. Merlin pretended the wince was from stumbling on an uneven stone, not the fact that Arthur would not be wrong to be livid with her. They had known each other for nearly a year and while she knew nearly everything about Arthur, she had knowingly kept important secrets from him. The fact that those secrets were a death sentence only made it worse. They stumbled through the door to his chambers and Arthur had just settled her into one of the chairs at his table when Gaius came rushing in with Gwen.

“Merlin?” Gaius asked, looking closely at her face. “Are you alright?”

“I’m just a little unsteady on my feet,” Merlin replied.

“There wasn’t any blood where Merlin fell, but I think he hit his head on the wall on the way down,” Arthur explained. Gaius probed at Merlin’s head and pretended to find a small bump, clucking and nodding.

“Well, that would explain Merlin being a little unsteady. Maybe he should have the rest of the night off,” Gaius suggested. “Sleep is often the best remedy for such injuries, so long as they aren’t too severe. The body can heal itself while you sleep.”

“Of course Merlin’s chores can wait until morning,” Arthur agreed. “He’s hopeless enough as it is. But there’s no point in dragging him halfway across the castle either. He can stay in the antechamber.” Gwen was, thankfully, fussing over Merlin and missed that Arthur was not making a suggestion but issuing a command. Gaius, however, was fully aware and turned wide eyes on Merlin.

“I’ll be fine,” Merlin agreed. “And this way I can get a few more minutes of sleep in the morning, because I’m closer to the kitchens.”

“Alright,” Gaius agreed. “Would like something to help with the pain?”

“I’m not in pain,” Merlin shook her head, then reached up and put a palm to her forehead. “I just get a little dizzy,” she lied in an undertone, like it was a confession. Gaius nodded and gently patted her knee.

“Just get some rest and hopefully you’ll feel fine in the morning.” Gaius managed to herd Gwen out of the room with him, leaving Arthur and Merlin alone in the silence.

“You’re a sorcerer,” Arthur accused.

“No, I was born with my magic. I’m a witch,” Merlin corrected.

“But…” Arthur was clearly confused.

“Your father isn’t exactly going to admit that some people don’t have a choice in whether or not they have magic when he’s banned magic and given it a death sentence, is he?” Merlin countered. Arthur shook his head.

“But why did you come here? Magic isn’t banned in Essetir.”

“I never planned to stay very long,” Merlin explained. “I was going to get a letter of recommendation from Gaius and go somewhere else. I wanted to go to Alined’s court. He has three Court Sorcerers and it’s rumored that fully half his household has magic. But, he’s cruel. I’m glad I didn’t end up there.”

“Gaius is still respected in… those communities? He hasn’t practiced magic since before the Purge.” Arthur was clearly still certain of that, which was good because, as far as Merlin was aware, it was true.

“Gaius was one of the most powerful sorcerers in all of Albion,” Merlin explained. “And it was only towards the end of the purge that he stopped helping people escape. He would strike names off lists of those that were supposed to be rounded up for execution. He would sneak people out of the citadel. Even though he’s been Uther’s man for years, that’s not something soon forgotten. Gaius saved many lives.”

“So basically, Gaius committed treason repeatedly,” Arthur said faintly. Merlin winced. “At least you aren’t as idiotic as I feared. I suppose that does explain how I’ve known you nearly a year now and had no inkling of this.”

“Well, you are good at conveniently falling unconscious,” Merlin answered with a shrug and an apologetic expression. Arthur almost protested but then merely sighed heavily and nodded in agreement.

“Have you ever done magic on me?” Arthur asked. Merlin thought about it.

“I used magic on everything around us in the market the second time we met-when you challenged me. I’ve no knowledge of maces, still,” she told him. Arthur nodded, not seeming to be terribly surprised by that. “I think I sent protective magic to you while I was unconscious when you were fetching the Morteus flower to cure the poison. Gaius said I did something while I was unconscious, but I’ve no memory of it.”

“There was a glowing light, a blue orb. It lit the way in the cave,” Arthur replied. “I imagine that was it. Anything else?”

“Um, Will wasn’t the sorcerer in Ealdor. That was me, obviously.”

“Obviously,” Arthur agreed faintly. “What you told me about Will was your story, wasn’t it?” Merlin nodded. “What else?”

“I went and got a magical remedy to save your life when you were injured by the questing beast,” Merlin replied. “I got Nimueh to bless water in the Cup of Life so it would heal you. We had a bit of a disagreement about payment afterward, but that’s not relevant to magic done to you…” Merlin trailed off, thinking back.

“You’ll tell me that story as well, once we’ve covered this,” Arthur ordered. Merlin nodded, wincing a little. She did not like to remember that. That whole stretch of days had been absolutely horrifying and completely emotionally draining.

“I used a magical potion to bring you back when we had to make your father cry because of the troll… I think that’s everything that could be said to be done to you,” Merlin nodded. “I’m sure you’ve gathered I do some of the chores by magic, but that’s not to you.”

“So, you’ve never used your magic to harm me or enchant me,” Arthur clarified. Merlin shook her head frantically.

“I’d never hurt you!” she exclaimed. Arthur smirked at her, and Merlin tilted her head in confusion.

“So it really is all women, is it, who fall at my feet?” Arthur asked, teasingly. Merlin rolled her eyes.

“Oh, you prat, we’re friends, aren’t we? Do you think I’d hurt Gwen or Morgana or Lancelot, really?”

“Of course I don’t,” Arthur agreed. “But we are friends and I will tease you if I wish it. But, I have to ask, in all seriousness, why are you still here? You could have left in spite of being named my manservant. No one would have bothered to pursue you.”

“Well, I am fond of Gaius and he never did give me a letter,” Merlin replied. “That’s what kept me here the first few weeks. But then you believed me, with almost no proof, when I accused Valiant. I suppose I accepted then that perhaps the Dragon rambling on about prophecies and destiny might not be all because of being locked up for twenty years. And then you became my friend and I have to protect you as best I can. Not all magic can be defeated with a sword, you know.”

“I suppose that makes sense, but what prophecies are you talking about?”

“The Dragon thinks you’re the one who’s going to fulfill a prophecy about king of Camelot becoming High King of all Albion, who of course, this is a Druidic prophecy, has a Court Sorcerer at his side. The Dragon says it’s me. I mean, it’s a lovely ideal to strive for, but the Dragon also has been chained up for twenty years without being able to see the sky and perhaps is not always reliable. Besides, the parameters for the prophecy are very vague, and everyone thought your father would be this High King before the Purge. So I’m not sure about this.”

Arthur made an agreeable noise, “I would imagine two decades of imprisonment would not be beneficial for one’s faculties, no matter if it’s a creature or not. I can understand your reluctance to assume the dragon has the one correct understanding of a vague prophecy. But am I to understand from your earlier comment about magic and swords that not all my victories have been my victories?”

“Well…” Merlin dithered. Arthur groaned.

“I think I’m going to need some wine for this conversation,” he muttered. Arthur strode to the door and flagged down a passing servant, asking for wine to be brought to his room. Merlin heard the girl agree and scurry off before Arthur returned, sinking into the chair across from hers. They both sort of stared at one another, taking the other’s measure for the first time with no secrets between them. Neither spoke until the maid returned with a flagon of wine and Arthur had her close the shutters. Merlin poured the wine into a cup and Arthur downed it and Merlin had poured again before the maid left.

“Go bar the door,” Arthur ordered. Merlin stood and went. If Arthur’s first instinct had not been to turn her in, he probably would not turn on her now. If he did, she could probably win the fight anyway with a swift blow to his head. Merlin sank back into her seat and waited until Arthur nodded to start explaining.

“Some of the magical creatures you’ve fought could only be stopped with magic. I enchanted the lance Lancelot slayed the Griffin with. Um, I’m the one who stopped Sigan after he possessed Cedric. I got a spell from the dragon that put his soul back in that jewel. I think that’s all. I don’t interfere in your fights, your jousts. I’ve dropped tree branches on bandits and knocked them out of trees and stuff like that.”

“So when you’re cowering on the ground, you’re doing sorcery and helping?” Arthur scoffed, “Of course you were.” He sighed, draining his cup again. Merlin refilled it automatically. Arthur caught her wrist. “Drop the disguise. Let me see you.” He was staring at her intently. Merlin let the spells fall away, shifting a little to keep the suddenly too-large clothing from exposing her. Arthur was still staring at her intently.

“It’s safer for a man alone on the road than a woman and then I ended up staying here and being your manservant,” Merlin explained. She felt awkward, with Arthur so clearly scrutinizing her face. They were not lovers and so she could not truly stare back without it becoming even more uncomfortable than it already was. Arthur finally let go of her wrist to shift her hair, looking at her ears.

“Your ears are small,” he mumbled absently. Merlin assumed it was a thought spoken aloud and ignored it. Arthur cupped her chin in his palm and turned her face this way and that for a moment before letting go of her entirely and sitting back in his chair. “You are quite pretty. It would have been very dangerous for you on the road alone. You were right to disguise yourself, as you likely would have been caught for sorcery fending off a man alone.”

“That was what Will and I both thought,” Merlin agreed. “We both knew Mother had never really trusted the other villagers and she would send me away eventually. So Will taught me how to pass as a man, so I would be safer on the road. The fact I make such an abysmally unattractive lad was just lucky coincidence.”

“You aren’t abysmally unattractive as a boy,” Arthur corrected. “You’ve got the same pretty eyes. Your ears are horrifying and you’re gangly, rather than tall and imposing, but trust me, you could look much worse.”

“Was that a compliment?” Merlin asked, a teasing smile on her face. Arthur glared at her in response. “No, I know I’m not hideous as a boy, but I don’t make someone look twice either. I once turned the head of a man twice my age who was already engaged to be married. I’m much more striking than any peasant girl has a right to be. Comparatively, not attracting attention feels…”

“Abysmally unattractive,” Arthur concluded. “You know, I had assumed you had no trysts because you were inexperienced and didn’t have the time to slowly sink into one with anyone but me, which you assured me could be hideously awkward. Obviously, it was because that’s not what you really look like.”

“I did start one,” Merlin admitted, smiling weakly at the thought of Freya.

“Will you tell me?” Arthur prompted.

“I was the one who snuck the Druid girl out of the cage,” Merlin began.

“I suspected even then. Why do you think I came and rescued you from the bounty hunter?”

“Thank you, for that,” Merlin replied. Arthur nodded in recognition. “Well, I brought her food and we both had magic and I kissed her and I thought I’d run away with her. But then you got her in the shoulder with your sword and I couldn’t save her. It was the sword burnished in dragon’s fire, after all.”

“You have my condolences,” Arthur told her gravely. “I wish the circumstances could have been different for you.”

“I know you were just trying to protect the castle, your people. I don’t blame you. But Freya was so dear to me, even so quickly.”

“I trust she got a proper send-off?”

“Yes. I laid her to rest on the lake of Avalon, where we fetched your sword from,” Merlin told him. Arthur gently covered her hand with his.

“You have to let me help you with these things from now on,” Arthur insisted. “I know you want to save everyone. But didn’t everything go much smoother with the Druid boy once you and Morgana trusted me to help?”

“It did,” Merlin agreed, even as she knew her face scrunched up. Mordred was not a common name, and much as she could not leave a child to Uther’s punishments or heaven forbid orchestrate his death herself, she feared that the Dragon was not as wrong as she hoped. Many sorcerers grew bitter from Uther’s edicts and had taken it out on Arthur. If Uther did not die before Mordred was old enough to be on his own, she would not be surprised by Mordred mortally wounding Arthur in some sort of attack on the King, whether by design or chance, especially given that the boy had fallen in with Alvarr for who knew how long. No one outside his small band approved of his views.

“What is it?”

“The Dragon was so certain that Mordred will be the one to kill you. He claimed it was foretold. I’m afraid I have mixed feelings, even now. Of course, I could not do anything to him myself or leave him to Uther’s punishment, he’s a child, but I would not be surprised if he grew into a man before your father’s death and mortally wounded you in some attack on the King. It could even be an unplanned injury to you, just so long as it was fatal. And assuming that the only thing that can be known is that the man who will kill you is named Mordred, how many are there really with that name? It isn’t that common. I don’t like the idea of him running around out there growing closer to killing you. But at the same time, you cannot punish someone for a crime they have not yet even planned.”

“Yes,” Arthur agreed, his voice soft and thoughtful, “The sorcerers still in Camelot are bitter. They’ve watched their loved ones die and been forced to hide themselves. It would be a lie to say I don’t understand why they’re angry with Father. I know his reasons, but if I had lost a spouse or sibling or parent to the Purge, knowing the reason would not be enough to keep me from hating the man who ordered their execution.”

“Exactly. Mordred has no reason to want you dead at the moment. He’s still a child and you have only helped him. But, growing up to be a man where his greatest talent is against the law and would get him executed? It got his guardian executed, as well, after all. He told me it was not his father he was with, but it was the man who raised him.”

“Well, we still have a few more years before the boy will be a man. If you’ve brought me back from the brink of death before, I imagine you can do it again, if you somehow manage to not be vigilant when Mordred returns.”

“Magic that powerful is subject to the ancient laws. It comes with a price. Nimueh and I weren’t haggling over gold coins. What that vision from Morgause told you about a life for a life is true-to make a life with magic or save a life from certain death with magic means a life must be given. Nimueh didn’t take the offered payment. She gave my mother a horrible pox. Gaius knew I was going to throw a fit and he beat me to her and she took his life to save my mother but I was already so angry with her. It wasn’t what I had agreed to.”

“You killed her.” It was not a question.

“Yes. And I used her death to bring Gaius back,” Merlin admitted. “I smote her with lightning. Ironically, it made me understand how your father came to decide banning magic was the best course of action. If I hadn’t been able to do anything about it, if I had to watch my mother die of the pox, I would have been angry forever. Before that, I had thought it was madness. Magic is part of the natural order of the world, after all. But I was so angry with her, I could have made that decision.” Arthur sat there in silence for a moment, staring at her.

“You could have condemned everyone like you for one woman?”

“No, but only because I had an alternative course of action.” Merlin sighed. “I’m not sure if it’s a feeling that can be explained. It was anger and outrage and betrayal and grief and guilt all wrapped up together and it was all her fault. I killed Nimueh for it. Your father never had that option. There was no one more powerful than Nimueh who was willing to stand against her.”

“You think he did conspire with her so Mother could conceive me,” Arthur accused. “You lied!”

“Not really,” Merlin shrugged. “I don’t trust Morgause. I’m not at all certain if that was your mother or not. Personally I’ve never heard of a ritual that lets you touch the dead. Morgause has more training than me, perhaps she knows of one. But I am certain that she knew what you would hear and that is why she came and challenged you in order to lure you to follow her. And I would stake my life that if your father agreed to the ritual that vision said he did, he offered his own life as payment. I do not believe for a moment that he ever intended any harm to ever come to your mother, if indeed he did ask Nimueh to give them a son.” Arthur stood, turning and pacing over to the window. Merlin kept quiet, letting him think. He had assumed that she had meant that everything that the vision had told him was lies. That there had never been a shred of truth in the ritual. For all Merlin knew, perhaps it had been his own mother, with her assumptions of the tale based on how it ended. But the Purge belied her story. Uther would not have been angry had he intended Ygraine to die so that Arthur would live.

“Thank you for not letting me kill my father,” he finally broke the silence.

“Of course,” Merlin agreed. There was more silence. Arthur came back to the table and drained his cup again. Merlin just watched him and silently refilled his cup. “What now?”

“I suppose we go to bed,” Arthur said tiredly. “There aren’t any more confessions you need to make, are there?”

“No,” Merlin shook her head. “I was expecting you to be angrier.”

“Well, when exactly were you going to tell me?” Arthur asked. “By the time you had been here long enough to make an informed decision to trust me, it would have been awkward at best.”

“Yes,” Merlin agreed. Arthur drained his cup again.

“Bedtime,” he decided. “My ribs hurt almost as much as my head does.” Merlin quickly herded Arthur over to the bed and helped him undress. She locked the servant’s entrance before she got undressed for bed herself. She had been planning on sleeping in her tunic, but Arthur stopped her at the edge of the bed and rubbed the fabric between his fingers with a displeased moue. “Go put on one of my nightshirts. They’re softer, meant for sleeping in.” Merlin sighed heavily at him, but Arthur just pointed at the wardrobe. She decided not to argue with Arthur when he had drunk so much wine without dinner or supper. She put on one of Arthur’s white nightshirts. It was softer than anything she owned. Merlin was allowed on the bed. Arthur rolled onto his side and pulled her close, pressing against her back and wrapping an arm around her waist.

“Goodnight,” she murmured.

“Night,” Arthur echoed.

They woke late the next morning, sunlight bright in their eyes. Merlin was still pressed along Arthur’s side, nightshirt tangled and rucked up around her legs. Somehow, with a man’s body, sharing a bed had been less before. Someone was knocking on the door. Merlin got up before Arthur could and ran a hand through her hair, an attempt to make it lie flatter, which thankfully reminded her that she looked like the girl she was. Merlin froze mid-step and a boy’s foot came down on the two day old rushes. She continued calmly to the door.

“What is it?” she asked, opening the door just slightly. It was Uther’s manservant, Rollins.

“Uther wants to know if Arthur is coming to council this morning.”

“Arthur is still asleep in bed, so I’m going to assume not,” she replied.

“I think that’s safe to assume,” Rollins agreed. “Council starts in about five minutes. I’ll go tell Uther.” Merlin nodded and closed the door. She turned around to see Arthur squinting at her.

“Who was it?”

“Rollins. Your father sent him to see if you were coming to council.”

“No,” Arthur shook his head and laid back down. “Come back to bed. My head is pounding.”

“I was thinking I should get dressed and find you some food. You haven’t eaten since breakfast yesterday, have you?” Arthur frowned at her.

“I suppose I haven’t,” he agreed. “I suppose you can go fetch breakfast. Borrow something of mine. Your clothes from yesterday smell.”

“Yes, Arthur,” Merlin agreed with a soft laugh. She had worn them two days in a row in the woods on horseback. She slipped into one of Arthur’s tunics and trousers, tying them closed at the waist with a belt. Merlin went down to the kitchens and got breakfast and ordered one of the male servants who was doing nothing but flirting with Magdalena, the newest of Cook’s helpers, to bring up a bath for Arthur. He would appreciate it.

Arthur had managed to drag himself out of bed by the time Merlin returned. They sat down to breakfast in companionable silence. Suddenly Arthur’s head jerked up to stare at her.

“This is why you turned me down,” he said. “Because I didn’t…” The opening door cut him off. It was Paxton with Arthur’s bathwater.

“Wash tub’s in the antechamber,” Merlin told him. “And yes, Arthur. That was exactly it.”

“We’ll continue this conversation later,” he mumbled, still looking at her strangely. Merlin ignored him in favor of the last piece of bacon on her plate. Paxton left and returned with the rest of the bath water and Arthur got in the bath. Merlin started tidying up the room and gathered up the old rushes. She changed them for fresh and then went to change into her own clothes before she did the laundry. Might as well wash what she had had on, since she hadn’t had a bath. She helped Arthur dress before collecting the laundry, including the bedding, and heading off to wash it all. By the time Merlin was finished, Arthur was training and they did not have time to talk until that night.

“Two baths in one day?” Merlin teased, walking into Arthur’s chambers with the supper tray only to find Arthur standing next to Reid as he emptied the last bucket of water into the wash tub. Arthur just gave her a quelling look. Merlin stopped teasing. Reid quickly left.

“The bath is for you.” Arthur walked over and sat down at the table, eating his supper. Merlin sort of blinked and gawked at him.

“Gaius has a wash tub, you know,” Merlin said. “I usually wash in my own room. I don’t…”

“Well, either you use it or it’s a tremendous waste of perfectly good warm water,” Arthur told her evenly. Merlin eyed the steaming water. A bath would be lovely. She pulled the screen out in front of the tub and happily stripped, sinking into the warm water. Oh, but that was nice. “Don’t forget to wash behind your ears,” Arthur teased. She only discovered after she had washed and dried that the bath had been a trap. Arthur had thrown her clothes into the laundry and given her one of his nightshirts to put on.

“Arthur!” Merlin grumbled, even as she pulled on the nightshirt to cover her nakedness. “That’s not funny.”

“Oh, you’re fine,” Arthur told her. “My clothes are nicer than yours anyway.”

“Yes, but the thing about my clothes is that they fit. And they’re clothes.”

“You are derailing the discussion I wanted to have,” Arthur grumbled. Merlin rolled her eyes.

“Perhaps you shouldn’t have started by stealing my clothes,” she countered. “But fine, what did you want to talk about?”

“You turned me down because I didn’t know about your…” Arthur did a vague hand waving motion, “and that you’re a…” he waved his hand again. Merlin nodded, assuming the first hand wave was magic and the second was girl.

“Yes. I thought it could become very awkward very quickly if I didn’t when you eventually found out. I mean, also, how exactly would I have brought that up? And it would have been poor timing then.” Arthur nodded, clearly thinking her points through.

“That all makes sense,” he agreed. “You know I’m not mad at you, right? I understand you were in an awkward position. I would never have turned you over to Father, but to put me in that position would have been presumptuous.”

“Yes,” Merlin nodded. “I assumed at worst that you would banish me for something. Or tell me to lie about my mother being ill and just never come back.”

“Not this time of year,” Arthur shrugged. “Over the summer, maybe I would have done that, if I was that mad, but it’s too cold for you to be traveling by yourself and if I wasn’t letting you come back, you would have to walk. It’s a few days to get to Ealdor walking, isn’t it?”

“Yes. It’s a fairly long journey on foot,” Merlin agreed quietly.

“Eat,” Arthur ordered gently.

“Don’t tell me what to do,” Merlin retorted. Arthur chuckled. Merlin sat down to eat anyway. Arthur watched her eat in companionable silence for a moment, trying not to keep her from getting her fill.

“How much power do you have? Your spells didn’t end when you were poisoned.”

“Too much,” Merlin scoffed. “But a spell with a human vessel is hard to overcome.”

“Oh,” Arthur nodded. “That makes sense, I guess.” Merlin nodded. “How did you not confess with the witch finder?”

“The dragon told me not to say it,” she admitted. “I was really out of it and Aredian kept telling me to confess and the dragon kept telling me not to and I listened to the dragon.”

“That was definitely a good plan,” Arthur agreed. Once Merlin was finished eating, she got up and banked the fire and tidied up a little. There was a timid knock on the door. Arthur answered it.

“May I speak with you, my lord?” Lancelot asked. Arthur turned to look at Merlin. What? Oh, right, he had stolen her clothes. She nodded. Arthur stood aside and opened the door. Lancelot coughed a little, probably a bit surprised by Merlin’s attire.

“What is it?” Arthur asked.

“I’m certain you must be aware that I’ve been courting Gwen,” Lancelot said awkwardly. “I was hoping to have saved enough to ask her to marry me by spring. If that’s not overstepping.”

“Why on Earth would it be overstepping?” Arthur asked. “Gwen’s a lovely girl and she’s essentially Morgana’s companion, so she isn’t too low for a knight of Camelot. Morgana might be ill-tempered if you expect Gwen to stop working, but you’ve always been reasonable.”

“No, I wanted to make certain that you did not have any designs or…” Lancelot explained awkwardly. Arthur took pity and cut him off.

“She may not be too low for you, Lancelot, but she is for me. All I could ever offer her would be my bed and my bastards and I respect her, and Morgana’s temper, too much to expect her to settle for that. Besides, Gwen and I shared one kiss. That’s not hardly something to stake a claim over. She prefers you and I wish you both the best together.”

“Thank you,” Lancelot smiled with relief at Arthur. “I thought I should speak to you before making intimations about promises to Gwen.”

“Of course,” Arthur nodded. “You didn’t grow up at court. I understand. Your father doesn’t ask you if he needs to find a castle somewhere to give someone if you tell him you’re in love.”

“The King said that?”

“He told me to find out what their ambitions were as soon as possible because he needed to plan for the expense if they expected a castle.”

“Should I offer you my best wishes as well?” Lancelot asked. Arthur shrugged.

“I don’t know yet.” Lancelot leaned in and whispered something Merlin couldn’t hear and Arthur chuckled.

“Well, I will bid you goodnight, sire,” Lancelot said and made his exit. Arthur followed him out and Paxton followed Arthur back in and took the wash tub to empty it. A moment later, Meredith came in and took the supper tray. Neither one even seemed to notice Merlin, which was nice as she was not at all certain she wanted to have to fend off comments on why she had been in Arthur’s nightshirt in the morning. Arthur closed and locked the door behind them.

“Come on, time for bed,” he murmured. Merlin just let him herd her into bed. Arthur pulled her close again, wrapping his arm around her. Merlin was almost asleep when Arthur spoke again. “If you could have anything, what would you want?”

“I don’t know,” Merlin mumbled.

“Surely you want something?”

“Dragons flying in the sky, like they did before I was born,” Merlin said with a soft laugh. “What sort of fool question is that? No one can have just anything.”

“I was just wondering,” Arthur grumbled. Merlin rolled her eyes at him but thankfully Arthur was behind her and saw nothing. He let her go to sleep.


	13. A Father

The next morning, Arthur woke up before her and was standing at the window when she blinked awake. He looked like something out of a fairytale, lit by the morning sun, hair glowing. Merlin shook her head, trying to ignore the silly fancy. It was just Arthur, the same as always. She got up and got dressed and went down to fetch breakfast without disturbing Arthur. He was clearly in deep contemplation of something. Perhaps he had needed the warning before Lancelot started making promises to Gwen. Even if he could not offer her anything worthy of her; that would not change his feelings and it might take time to reconcile. When Merlin returned with the breakfast tray, Arthur was throwing clothes on.

“Oh, I’m sorry, are you supposed to be in council?” She cringed. “I would have gotten up sooner.”

“No,” Arthur slowly shook his head, staring queerly at her. “I hadn’t even heard you get up.”

“Oh, you looked lost in thought. I left you to it.” She lifted the tray in offering, “Bacon?” Arthur nodded. They sat down and ate before Merlin started in on her daily chores. Arthur paced rudely across the floor, constantly getting underfoot. Merlin decided to do some of the chores that were outside the room, like finding and returning Arthur’s wash tub, the laundry, and generally being not where Arthur was. He was a little better after training. He at least sat at his table with candles and flipped through old parchment that Geoffrey had brought him, which was much less irritating. At least, until he told her what he wanted to do.

“You want to hunt down a dragonlord in the hopes that he will agree to come to Camelot because you claim you suddenly want to free the dragon?” Merlin said incredulously. “And you want to do it now? You are aware that it’s November. It could snow. We could freeze.”

“Yes, but all the better to do it right before it snows,” Arthur countered. “No one would be able to follow the dragonlord. He’d be safer than in the spring. Besides, how else can I expect a dragon that’s been chained to a rock for twenty years not to try to get revenge on the man who imprisoned him?” Arthur paused. “Or is it a girl? Do dragons have gender?”

“Um,” Merlin shrugged. “Your father killed them all before I was born. I don’t know any more than you do.”

“Except one, which should be free,” Arthur corrected.

“Well, yes, of course he should be free,” Merlin agreed. “But that doesn’t mean…” She was cut off by a knock at the door. Morgana did not wait for a response.

“Frankly, Arthur, I’m a little hurt,” she said with a pout.

“What’s gone wrong now?” he asked.

“You really should have told me first.”

“Told you what first?”

“That Merlin was really your favorite now. I had to hear from Gwen from Lancelot. That’s just not how things should be done.”

“I just let Merlin borrow a nightshirt. He needed a bath.”

“That’s your excuse?” Morgana was obviously not impressed. “Merlin could bathe just as well in his own chambers.”

“I take it…”

“Shut up, Arthur!” Merlin cut him off. She was fairly certain that Morgana did not know that Arthur had stayed with Gwen during the jousting tournament and therefore he would have caused unnecessary trouble with her already in a bad mood. “It’s not an excuse. He decided I smelled so he stole my clothes.”

“Oh,” Morgana looked even more put out. “That’s disappointing. I thought I was going to have something to tease him about.”

“You could tease him about being a domineering nitwit,” Merlin suggested.

“That’s true. It really isn’t your place to insist on your manservant getting clean enough for your tastes to the point of having a bath made and then stealing his clothes because you decided that they smell. I’m sure Merlin was perfectly clean.”

“Well, I did need a bath. I hadn’t gotten one since we had gotten home from the disaster at Idirsholas, but I had on clean clothes. I had only worn them that day. The clothes had to smell fine.” Morgana wrinkled her nose up.

“While I’m starting to understand your complaint, you can’t simply order your servant about in their personal hygiene.” Arthur laughed. Merlin frowned. She had been plenty clean enough.

“I had washed with a bowl and cloth!”

“Oh, well, that’s alright then,” Morgana agreed. “You certainly can’t have time for a full bath as often as Arthur or I do. Arthur, you need to stop being rude to Merlin. He’s too good to you.”

“He argues with me all the time!” Arthur protested. “How is that good?”

“It keeps your ego at a more reasonable size,” Morgana said with a sniff. She turned and flounced out of the room.

“Well, that was a lovely visit,” Merlin scoffed. She went to close the door behind Morgana.

“Almost as lovely as Lancelot asking me if I was going to send him to his death for courting Gwen,” Arthur grumbled. “Do I really give off that impression?”

“That you get in prat moods and let some sneak-thief take over my job? Yes, yes you do.” Arthur huffed at her.

“No, that I would kill someone because I was disappointed. That’s not the kind of man I want to be.”

“I’ve never gotten that impression. I mean, you bluster, you complain, you yell about little things, you try to get people fired because they’re new and you didn’t smash their head in with a mace… Actually, yes, that is the first impression I had of you. You threw me in the dungeons, I got put in the stocks, and then you tried to kill me with a mace. You seemed extremely violent. I wanted desperately to just go back home because if you were any indication, everyone was going to be awful.”

“Well, don’t hold back, tell me what you really think.” Arthur sighed. “I was a little cruel when we first met. But I’m quite certain I did not have you put in the stocks.”

“No, Gaius got me put in the stocks. Apparently it was a lesser punishment?”

“Gaius was mad at you.”

“Yes, yes, he was.”

“Was it because he knew you were a…” Arthur did that strange hand motion. Merlin sighed heavily.

“No, he still doesn’t know,” she replied.

“Does anyone know?”

“Um, not here. Mordred knows. He was in Ealdor for Midsummer. Obviously everyone from home knows. The dragon I would think probably knows but he always calls me warlock, so I’m not certain.”

“Maybe he thought it was a decision based on preference, not avoiding unwanted attention.”

“That is possible, which is why I’m not certain if he knows or not.”

“But Gaius does know you have ma—” Arthur cut himself off.

“Yes, he does know that. He’s gotten mad at me a few times about it.”

“Oh! The avanc illness, did you really just pray?”

“Yes I did,” Merlin preened. “I used a little extra wind on the avanc with the fire on the torch, but I did tell you that the Goddess listens and gives you what you ask for.”

“You did tell me,” Arthur agreed with a laugh. There was a sort of awkward silence following that. Nothing really left to say on the subject and no other topic at hand to discuss. Merlin finished up her nightly chores and Arthur dismissed her. She was back a little earlier than usual and finished Gaius’ potions while he sat down to his own supper. He looked a little surprised to see her, but Merlin ignored it. At least he had not said anything. She had no idea how to explain Arthur’s recent behavior. Thankfully, Gaius just chatted about his work, a short illness had been making its way through the lower town, nothing too serious but Gaius had gone around and given medicine to those who wanted it.

That night, Merlin did not sleep well. She tossed and turned for what felt like hours. Her room was cold, her bed was lumpy, her blanket was too rough to be comfortable and too thin to keep out the cold. All of it had been fine the last time she had slept in her bed, only a couple days prior. She felt as though she had not slept at all when Gaius fetched her the next morning. She was still in bed because surely it could not be time to get up yet. She was exhausted and had even more sympathy for Morgana.  
Merlin hurriedly dressed to keep off the chill and dragged herself down to the kitchens to fetch Arthur’s breakfast. Adara snuck her a slice of hot bacon for Uther’s breakfast off the fire and it burned her tongue but Merlin really appreciated it. She had been abed too long to get more than a small hunk of bread for breakfast, which she had eaten on the way down.

Arthur was awake and out of bed when she arrived, flipping through the same parchments he had been looking at the day before. “You look exhausted!” He jumped up and grabbed the tray from her hands.

“Just didn’t sleep well,” she scoffed. “No need for dramatics.”

“Why didn’t you sleep well?” Arthur asked solicitously. Merlin blinked at him for a minute. He stared at her expectantly. Oh, must be serious then.

“It’s cold in Gaius’ chambers, especially my room. There’s no glass on the window and we’re in the tower. I just didn’t realize I needed to pick up a thicker blanket. I’ll be fine tonight.”

“If you’re sure,” Arthur agreed with a slow nod and finally started eating.

“What have you been reading?” Merlin changed the subject as she puttered around, tidying up.

“Records from the end of the Purge,” Arthur explained. “I want to see if anyone survived from the dragonlord families.”

“There were five families.” Merlin knew that much. “I’m sure someone had to. Still don’t see why we’re doing this. Arthur sighed heavily at her and stuffed the last sausage in his mouth, hurriedly eating it.

“Come on.” Arthur took her hand and led her down to the dragon’s cave. It alighted on the rock in front of them.

“What is it, young Pendragon? Are you in need of my assistance?”

“No. I have a question for you and I’d like you to answer honestly.”

“I can do that for you,” the dragon agreed.

“If I let you go right now, freed you from this cave right in this moment, would you try to get your revenge on my father?” The dragon looked very serious and took a long moment before answering.

“I believe that I would, young Pendragon. He has grievously wronged me and mine, my siblings and my children, our dragonlords. He deserves punishment for that.” Merlin agreed that the reasoning made sense. But where was the problem?

Arthur nodded, unsurprised. “That is why I’m trying to find a dragonlord, Merlin. My father would hide in the castle and the people would suffer.”

“Should I take this conversation to mean you are planning to free me?” the dragon asked, hope in its voice.

“If I can find a dragonlord to agree, you’ll be freed before winter,” Arthur promised. “But I must arrange for the safety of my people first.”

“Of course. Just because they mean nothing to me does not mean that you should not care for them. Thank you, young Pendragon.” Arthur nodded and led the way back out of the cave.

“Do you see? Father would not bring the entire citadel into the castle for their safety. He would leave them to their fate. And even if he did, their homes could be destroyed. It would be horrific. So if we do this, we need someone who is willing to ascertain that the dragon can’t do that.”

“I suppose that makes sense,” Merlin conceded. Arthur nodded, smiling with satisfaction at her agreement.

“Of course it makes sense. I’m not nearly as bad a tactician as Morgana tries to make me out to be.”

“If you say so,” Merlin agreed. They had to cut off their conversation as they snuck back up through the castle to Arthur’s chambers. After all, conspiring to find a dragonlord and free the dragon was probably treason, even for Arthur. His father would certainly never approve of the plan. Which was why Merlin still wasn’t entirely certain what had brought this idea to his head. Of course the dragon deserved to be free. That was given. But Arthur had expressed no thoughts on the matter to Merlin prior to his sudden fit of planning, which was a much further step on the line of getting something accomplished than one expected to be notified. Arthur was under no obligation to confess all his thoughts to Merlin, admittedly, but she would have thought that she would have had some indication that he was concerned about the dragon’s plight. Surely this had not all come out of him asking her what she wanted and her wanting a return of dragons to Albion. That would be ridiculous. Wouldn’t it?

Whatever the cause, Arthur spent the next few days scouring months’ worth of records from the end of the Purge, looking for those in the dragonlord families that had either disappeared or escaped or found sanctuary with some other kingdom. Thankfully, two if those days were filled with a horrid freezing rain that kept everyone tucked up indoors by a hearth and not wondering where Arthur was. All of the dragonlords had been nobility prior to the purge, but Arthur was hoping to find someone who had spent enough time as a noble to logically prioritize keeping the people safe and agree that the dragon being freed was worth not getting revenge. Merlin spent those days with the rest of the chamber servants getting all the winter rugs and blankets and curtains out of storage and thinking that she really thought this trip could wait until spring. Arthur eventually decided that their best bet was the only Dragorn who had escaped the purge. He had been a grown man then, almost thirty, and the Dragorns had been active in the court both before and after Uther took the throne. He should be very aware of politics and would hopefully agree to Arthur’s terms. His name was Balinor and he had apparently fled into Essetir through the old Druid paths, where Uther’s knights had lost his trail. But there were continued reports of a man matching his description living near the town of Enged, a town on the border with Nemeth, Kent, and Tir Mor up in the mountains.

“Arthur, are you aware that Camelot has no treaties with Nemeth or Essetir and both Kent and Tir Mor are filled with Saxons? There is a reason he chose there to settle. We could very well die just trying to get there.”

“My blue cloak is plenty warm. I simply won’t wear anything with the Camelot crest. And your talents aren’t illegal in Essetir. Between my sword and you, we should be perfectly fine. Besides, most of the rest of those who escaped were either elderly or children, because they didn’t come to the citadel when my Father trapped them. They are likely dead or have no grasp of politics, because most of the children didn’t turn up in foreign courts. This Balinor is our best hope for actually agreeing to do what we want.”

“You aren’t going to listen to me, are you?” Merlin sighed.

“No, I’m not. We’re leaving on a hunting trip and hopefully we will be back in a few days with this dragonlord and he’ll order the dragon to leave peacefully and everything will be settled and no one will even know. It’s not like anyone goes down to check on the dragon anymore.”

“I hate everything about this plan,” Merlin groaned.

“You’ll be fine. Just be sure to get yourself a nice thick cloak before we go. I don’t have a second one without any identifying marks on it, or I would just lend you one.”  
“I really hate everything about this plan.”

Nevertheless, Merlin went to the market the next day and bought herself a thick cloak. It was far more than she usually cared to spend, but she had unfortunately felt it when the man pushed it at her, saying it was the best one he had. It was lined with the softest fur and was dyed a beautiful dark blue with dark green embroidery along the hems and it had a hood. Merlin could not pass it up. She paid the ridiculous sum and took her new cloak to Arthur’s chambers to pass inspection. Several of his knights were there, talking about salaries and expenses. 

“We have the money to do that,” Leon said. “With Ewan gone home and Galahad not starting training to take his place until spring…” Merlin ignored them. 

“Acceptable?” she asked. Arthur looked up and blinked at her. “The cloak, Arthur. You told me to get a cloak, remember?”

“Oh,” Arthur nodded. “Sorry, I was still thinking about numbers.” He got up and took the cloak from her to inspect it. “It’s good. How much was it?” Merlin told him. “That’s actually fairly inexpensive. I’d swear this is mink fur, but the color says it’s rabbit.”

“So, I won’t freeze on this extremely ill-advised hunting trip?” Merlin countered.

“No, you won’t freeze. Take this to your room and then bring my dinner.”

“Yes, Arthur,” Merlin grumbled, taking the cloak back. He was still discussing expenses for the knights when she returned, but he thanked her when she set his food down. She had brought enough for all the knights, thinking it would be rude not to feed them.

Though Merlin had anticipated that they would leave the next day, Arthur spent all of Sunday in audiences with his father, because apparently there were no audiences during the winter. Personally Merlin thought that one would prefer audiences during the winter because if someone trekked all the way to the castle about something in the snow, it was going to be worth your time.

They started out just before first light on Monday instead. Arthur took Hengreon, the stallion, rather than Llamrei, in the expectation that he could bear both of them back while Balinor could ride Duane. It would certainly slow them less than having someone walk back. Enged was certainly nowhere near the citadel and in order to maintain that this was a hunting trip, they would have to return within a few days and then Arthur would have to spend a day hunting and bring something back.

They left early and rode hard, stopping only briefly and staying well within Camelot’s borders as they rode south towards Nemeth. Arthur at least had the good sense not to cross into a kingdom that would happily take his head off until the last moment. They made camp that on the Camelot side of the border with Essetir near Nemeth, Arthur was fairly certain they were on the Camelot side, at least. He thought it shouldn’t be more than a couple hours’ ride to get to the general area where Balinor was. Merlin thought this was probably not going to go as smoothly as Arthur thought it would. Why would this man care any more than the dragon did about the people of Camelot. He couldn’t know any of them, not after almost nineteen years in Essetir and nearly all of his peers slaughtered by Uther during the Purge. But Arthur was insistent and Merlin was willing to hope for the dragon’s sake that he would soon be free. Plus her new cloak was extremely warm and she barely felt the cold.

They reached Enged and had been given vague directions to Balinor by midmorning the next day. Apparently he lived out by some lake a few miles above the city. Merlin thought that was pretty good, considering they were strangers. Arthur was a little grumpy that the directions were so unspecific. He wanted exact numbers and distinct landmarks. They rode up the mountain a little distance and Merlin could feel the dragonlord’s magic calling to her.

“This way,” she announced.

“How do you know?” Arthur asked.

“I can feel his magic with mine. He’s going to know we’re coming.”

“Well, I suppose that’s just as well,” Arthur mused. “Perhaps he’ll be more inclined to trust us, knowing you have magic before we get there.”

“Hopefully, because if he doesn’t want to be found then we’re going to have trouble,” Merlin told him.

“What does that mean?” Arthur asked with a strangled voice.

“It means he’s got more magic than most men do. Given his age, I would be loath to try my power against his because I’m certain he has more knowledge than I have.”

“Grand,” Arthur grumbled. “I thought the records said that the women were sorceresses and the men just tamed the dragons. Of course they have magic as well. That would have been too easy.”

“Oh, stop your whining. This was your idea.” Thankfully, Balinor was not completely opposed to being found. He was waiting for them outside of whatever structure he lived in, standing by the lake, when they approached. It was still not even noon.

“Who are you?” he demanded suspiciously.

“I’m Arthur Pendragon,” Arthur admitted. “And I’ve come to ask for your help in freeing the great dragon my father imprisoned.” Merlin and Balinor both gawked at Arthur.

“You don’t open with that!” Merlin squawked. “Are you mad? Morgana’s right, you are horrible at diplomacy.”

“Merlin, shut up,” Arthur snapped.

“The boy has a point,” Balinor said. “You really should not open with that. But I’ll admit that you have my interest. Why should you need my help in freeing the dragon? Surely you just remove his chains and he is free.”

“Arthur thinks that he’ll attack the citadel for revenge and wants to protect the people in the Lower Town,” Merlin explained. “Apparently Uther is a coward who would hide in the castle until it collapsed on his head and then he would escape through the siege tunnels and the only people who would suffer would be the peasants who had nothing to do with him being imprisoned.”

“I went and asked the dragon and he said he wanted revenge. Don’t act like I’m ascribing violent tendencies he doesn’t have to him,” Arthur snapped.

“I can see your concerns,” Balinor agreed, sounding a little amused. “Why don’t you come in?”

“Where is in?” Arthur asked as he dismounted.

“Why does your father let you out in public?” Merlin asked the sky. Balinor laughed.

“And who are you?”

“I’m Merlin. I had a moment of madness and saved this prat’s life and I was rewarded with a position as his manservant. I’ve been his manservant for most of a year and I still haven’t figured out how it’s a reward.”

“You paid for that rabbit’s fur cloak, didn’t you?” Arthur demanded irritably as he helped her down. Balinor eyed them intently but revealed nothing of his thoughts as he led them into a cave hidden by the trees. It was admittedly a good spot tactically. There was plenty of water and food and cover, in addition to being in a place that Uther would have trouble reaching. Arthur walked in first and Balinor leaned over to whisper in Merlin’s ear.

“Does he know?”

“Yes, he does, actually.”

“And he hasn’t turned you over to Uther?”

“No. He wasn’t angry at all. He isn’t his father,” Merlin winced and so did Balinor. “At least, he’s more like his father was before Nimueh killed Ygraine. He decided to free the dragon rather suddenly but he seems sincere about it.”

“How long has he known about the dragon?”

“Since this past April,” Merlin told him. “There was an incident.” Arthur was glaring at them.

“I just wanted to know if you knew about his magic,” Balinor said.

“Yes. I’m aware,” Arthur replied curtly. “Merlin, come here.” Merlin obeyed.

“What’s wrong?” she whispered.

“I just want you close in case he decides he doesn’t like us.” Merlin kept her opinions on the likely cause of Balinor deciding not to like them to herself. Arthur was the one who came across as gruff and rude.

“Well, at least the suspicions run both ways,” Balinor said with a chuckle. “Have you eaten dinner?”

“No, do you have food?” Merlin asked excitedly. “All we have left is bread.”

“I’ve got some fish,” Balinor nodded. “I’ll share. Now, Pendragon, tell me your plan for freeing the dragon.”

“I just want you to come back to Camelot with us and order the dragon not to attack the citadel. After that, he can go wherever he chooses and so can you. I don’t think anyone should notice so long as we free the dragon after the sun sets, but if someone does, it will be hard for anyone to pursue you through the snow.”

“That seems simple enough,” Balinor agreed. “And you would trust me not to simply order him to kill you once you freed him?”

“None of this is Arthur’s fault!” Merlin protested. “He was only a baby. How could you kill him for his father’s crime?”

“His father’s crimes are numerous and bloody. Nimueh may have betrayed him and Ygraine but none of the rest of us did. It was my sister, Adeline, that found him in that hovel he grew up in, convinced the rest of us to back his claim to the throne with our dragons. Then, even after he put her aside for Ygraine, we all continued our support. Our dragons kept Camelot’s borders strong. He betrayed us and murdered us and the dragons and all our kin. He hunted down the Druids, who are a peaceful people, and slaughtered them. He deserves punishment.”

“Killing Arthur won’t help punish him, though,” Merlin protested. “It will only leave Camelot without an heir, which punishes the people.”

“I intend to lift the ban on magic once I am King,” Arthur announced. “I cannot execute a man for helping his crops grow or mending a cart wheel. And those who use magic to harm are breaking other laws and can be given those punishments.” Balinor turned from the fire to stare at Arthur.

“Fine words, boy,” he finally said. “I suppose your manservant shows that you are telling the truth. At least, for now.”

“I see no reason to change my views,” Arthur replied defensively.

“Neither did your father and yet he did. One can only hope that you did not inherit whatever fault it was that caused him to curse all of us.”

“Yes,” Arthur agreed awkwardly. Merlin rolled her eyes at the both of them. 

“So, are you going to come or not?” Merlin asked.

“I will come. I owe it to Kilgarrah to free him if I can.”

“He has a name?” Arthur asked inanely. Merlin groaned.

“Just because he didn’t offer his name and shake hands does not mean that he never had a name, you prat.”

“Well, typically people introduce themselves,” Arthur grumbled.

“I can’t imagine why someone wouldn’t introduce themselves to their captor’s child,” Balinor said with a sly smile. Merlin chuckled softly. Arthur glared at both of them. “Fish is ready.”

“I’ll go get the bread,” Merlin offered. This was rather humorous. When she got back, Arthur was asking Balinor about how he had ended up living near Enged when his castle had been in the north of Camelot, near where Caerleon’s kingdom met the Perilous Lands.

“Well, we had all been summoned to the citadel. Your father had promised a treaty, his apologies, his regret. Unfortunately, it was a trap. Many of us went, bringing our dragons with us. I believe I may have been the only one to escape from the citadel. There were plenty of elderly and children and some of the women had stayed back to care for them, but most of us were in the citadel and executed. Gaius helped me, sent me over the border to Ealdor. He knew a woman named Hunith who lived there and would give me shelter. She had served as his assistant for a few years before returning home to care for her father.”

“Merlin’s from Ealdor,” Arthur said.

“Is Hunith still there?” Balinor asked hopefully. “Is she well?”

“Yes, to both,” Merlin nodded. “Hunith is my mother.”

“Oh, then she married,” Balinor said. “Good. She was a lovely woman.” Merlin was too busy staring at him with her mouth open to answer.

“No, Hunith never married,” Arthur answered for her. “Why? Were you close before you had to move on?” Now Balinor had caught on. He turned to Merlin, eyes wide.

“How old are you?”

“I’ll be eighteen in January,” she told him.

“Who’s your father?”

“My mother never gave me a name.”

“I think…” Balinor cut himself off.

“Of course,” Arthur whispered. “Merlin, you were born about ten months after the dragons and dragonlords were killed.”

“I have a son,” Balinor pulled her into a warm embrace.

“Daughter, actually,” Merlin corrected. “But it was safer on the road and I don’t trust Uther.”

“A daughter?” Balinor pulled back just enough to see her face. “Let me see you, then.” Merlin obligingly removed the spells. Her father stared into her face, tears filling his eyes. “You look almost exactly like my sister, Adeline. You’re so beautiful.” He pulled her into a tight embrace again.

“Isn’t she?” Arthur agreed. Merlin shook her head at him.

Balinor glared at him, “I hope you aren’t thinking about getting any ideas about my daughter. She could do far better than warming the bed of the son of Uther Pendragon, boy.”

“I was well aware of that before I knew she was nobility,” Arthur said. “Don’t be concerned.”

“Good,” Balinor said. He planted a kiss on both her cheeks.

“After we free Kilgarrah, I’ll take you to Mother,” Merlin decided. “But first, let’s eat before the fish gets cold.” Everyone could agree that cold fish was less than palatable. They ate dinner and then Merlin helped her father pack up his meagre belongings. He was not going to come back to a cave, if her mother had not moved on. Merlin thought that was a very good plan indeed. There would be someone to watch over her mother while she was looking after Arthur in Camelot.

“I’ll see what I can do about getting your castle back to you,” Arthur said randomly as they started back. Merlin was in Arthur’s lap on his horse and Balinor had started to pitch a fit but quieted when Merlin explained about traveling time and that Uther thought they were out on a hunting trip.

The afternoon passed quietly. They were trying to get safely back into Camelot by nightfall and so they were not riding leisurely enough to allow for easy conversation. Thankfully, they were well into Camelot, according to Arthur, by the time the sun was setting and even Balinor agreed that they were in Camelot when they made camp for the night. They all slept side by side, trying to preserve as much warmth as possible in the cold. The horses huddled together as well. They rode a little less hurriedly the next day, but there was still a lot of riding to do. They reached Camelot before dark, so Arthur left Merlin and Balinor to talk while he went off in search of some game to take back into the citadel tomorrow.  
“Arthur seems a decent sort,” Balinor admitted. “Of course, I’m sure you know we all thought the same of his father.”

“Yes. But I think Arthur really is a decent sort. And besides, he isn’t hardly going to ask someone to help his barren wife conceive, knowing what he knows about his own birth, he’ll be more careful.”

“Did you tell him?”

“Not exactly. Morgause did some ritual to let him talk to his mother briefly. Ygraine told him herself. Although she assumed that Uther had meant for her to die so Arthur could be born. And Arthur nearly killed his father and I stopped him because he would have been a frightful king after that, so then I later had to clarify that the main incorrect information was whose life Uther had bargained.”

“Oh,” Balinor nodded. “That was generous of you. You got that from your mother, I’m afraid.”

“Yes, but I’m not as generous as she is. She was always chiding me for being too quick-tempered as a child.”

“I am sorry I missed it.”

“It was not your doing.”

“No, but had I known Hunith was with child, I never would have left her. I would have stood my ground. Ealdor is in Essetir, in Kearia’s land. Uther had no authority there.”

“That’s quite true,” she agreed. “I just wish I knew more about you. I want to know everything and Arthur’s going to insist that I come straight back from Ealdor because of the possibility of snow.”

“Did your mother never speak of me?”

“I suppose she missed you too much. I learned when I was young that she wouldn’t answer any questions about who my father was except to say that you were a good man.”

“Oh,” Balinor nodded. “It took me years to be able to speak her name. I felt so guilty for leaving her behind like I had, not having married her. But how could I have asked her to live in hiding with me?”

“Of course you couldn’t have asked,” Merlin agreed. “But mother would have gone with you, I am certain.”

“She would have hated me for it. I don’t think even your mother could have kept a cave to her standards of cleanliness.”

Merlin groaned. “That was my life. I was so glad when I was big enough not to float away downstream and I got to wash laundry instead of doing inside chores twice a week.” Balinor laughed.

“I bet you were. Your mother should have had a whole pack of children running around to help her keep the house clean.”

“It would have been nice to have siblings. But I had Will. I think they must have arrived after you left. But he’s always been a good friend to me.”

“Oh? A good, close friend?” her father asked, mostly teasing.

“No, nothing like that. He’s like a brother, really. We’ve known each other too long or something.”

“Ah. What about Arthur? He must be pretty fond of you to risk harboring you. Uther would never kill his own son, but he could end up with some horrible punishment.”

“I’m fairly certain he’s still hung up on Gwen.”

“Oh?”

“Morgana’s handmaiden, I mean Vivienne and Gorlois’ daughter Morgana. She’s Uther’s ward. She and Gwen are both lovely. But all Arthur could offer Gwen would be his bed, and Morgana would kill him, probably literally, for disrespecting Gwen like that so he’s not done anything about it. They kissed once. But one of Arthur’s knights is courting Gwen and she is very fond of him and they’ll probably be married in the spring.”

“Ah, a bit of an awkward situation. I think he might not be as hung up on her as you think. Clearly he’s fond of you.”

“I’m not so sure.”

“Well, that’s a very fine cloak.”

“But I bought it myself,” Merlin corrected. “And he did try to kiss me once but that was months and months ago. I don’t think he’s thinking that way anymore.”

“Well, then, perhaps you’re right. I’ve only known the boy for a day and a half. Maybe he stares like that at everyone in Camelot.” Merlin scoffed.

Arthur met back up with them as the sun set, interrupting their conversation. Merlin led the way into the citadel, past the guards. Once they were in the castle proper, her father took the lead and led them through a corridor that Merlin did not recognize but it opened up almost directly on the stairs to the dragon’s cave. The dragon was waiting on the rock for them.

“Hello, Kilgarrah,” Balinor said.

“Hello, Balinor,” the dragon replied in kind. Merlin and Arthur kept quiet. “Did you notice about Merlin?”

“You mean that I have a child?” Balinor asked wryly. “Yes I did. Don’t think that you’ll distract me.”

“Uther deserves to die. He slaughtered our kin. To take the lives of his people would only restore the balance.”

“Adeline gave her life putting Uther on that throne. In her honor, I can agree with Uther’s son to spare his people and stem the carnage.” Kilgarrah was clearly displeased with that answer and looked like he might do something extremely ill-advised. But Balinor roared at him in the dragon tongue. Though Merlin had never heard it, she knew the sound. Kilgarrah bowed to her father.

“Will he behave?” Arthur asked.

“He will go peacefully now,” Balinor agreed. “You can free him.” Of course, with chains strong enough to hold a dragon, Merlin was the one who was actually doing the freeing. She sent a blast of magic at the chains and they fell off, dropping into the chasm. Kilgarrah flexed his wings and then propelled himself into the air. He turned and disappeared out of the cave and into the night. Arthur almost said something, but clearly thought the better of it.

Balinor led the way back out to the forest. Kilgarrah was waiting calmly in a clearing near where they had made camp that afternoon. Balinor went to confer silently with Kilgarrah while Merlin helped Arthur with the two rabbits he had caught earlier and made a campfire. They would have to eat one of those rabbits tonight, after all. Merlin restrained herself from eavesdropping on her father’s conversation even though Arthur was quiet. Kilgarrah flew off somewhere before Balinor returned.

“He has somewhere to go?” Arthur asked solicitously.

“Yes, he won’t be troubled there,” Balinor agreed. “He said to thank you for freeing him.”

“Of course,” Arthur nodded. “You and Merlin should take Hengroen in the morning when you leave for Ealdor. He’ll be able to carry you both.”

“Thank you,” Balinor said emphatically. “I am truly indebted to you. You’ve given me my life back, my kin, a family.”

“Merlin’s paid that debt back several times over,” Arthur assured him. “I would have been dead quite a few times if not for her interfering. I hold you to no debt. I feel it should possibly be the other way around.”

“Nevertheless, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You have my loyalty, Pendragon.”

“I am honored, Lord Dragorn.”

“I have lived these past almost twenty years in a cave. I am no Lord.”

“The Dragorns were the founding lineage of Camelot and you yourself put my father on his throne. I must acknowledge that and honor you.” Arthur looked quite serious. “I will try to find some way to restore your home to you. It was wrong of my father to turn on his supporters the way he did.”

“Your father will never agree. You have certainly done enough.”

“Uther would be so angry with you,” Merlin agreed.

“He already asked if you wanted to be a Lord,” Arthur replied with a shrug. “I’ll just tell him that you said yes.”

“What?” Merlin gawped at Arthur. “How did that come up?”

“Your father thinks you will take Merlin as your consort?” her father asked slowly. He sounded less than pleased.

“Because I am fond of Merlin, it is common gossip in the citadel that we share a bed. Since it keeps the knights from disrespecting Merlin and she does fulfill many of the duties of a squire, I have ignored the gossip. They assume that means it’s true.”

“Oh,” Balinor nodded slowly. “But how did that lead your father to assume that not only was it true, but that you would take Merlin as a consort?”

“Uh,” Arthur blushed. “I told him it was not true and he assumed that I allowed Merlin liberties like speaking freely and sharing my meals because I love her. So he started on about expenses and ambitions and planning for things in advance to avoid having to suddenly greatly increase taxes or something.”

“Yes, that does tend to cause unrest with the populace.”

“It does. But if I tell him tomorrow that Merlin does want a castle, then he should have time to arrange everything by spring.”

“But won’t he be a little suspicious if you insist on giving me a castle and then I’m not your consort?” Merlin was very confused as to why either of them thought this could work out long term. They both exchanged a look.

“You could have decided that you had everything you wanted when you got the castle,” her father suggested.

“Or, I gave you the castle to try and court you, but you weren’t impressed,” Arthur offered. “I’m sure I could manage to figure out a plausible explanation for Father. And he certainly would think it natural that you would want to appoint someone you knew as Steward.” Balinor nodded. Apparently Merlin was the only one who thought a castle was a little too big of a gift to gamble for someone’s affections with. Of course, her father had grown up in a castle, just like Arthur had. Merlin was the only one who had been raised in a peasant village. She thought that anything that cost any money was too much try to earn someone’s affection with. If they weren’t pleased with flowers or a pretty pebble or a carving then clearly they would not be pleased.

It was cold enough that her father did not protest when Arthur laid the bedrolls out side by side by side. Merlin slept in the middle with Arthur protecting her from the cold on one side and her father on the other. Even with the hard ground beneath her, she slept well.

They next morning Arthur saw them off as Merlin and Balinor set off towards Ealdor. Balinor told stories of dragons and dragonlords as they rode, trying to fit a lifetime’s worth of memories into a day’s journey. They travelled at an easy pace, in no real rush.

Balinor told her about growing up as much at court as his own fortress home. He told her some of the stories he had learned as a child- about their ancestors founding Camelot, about how a peasant knight had married in and taken the name Pendragon and the throne. He told her about dragons, about eggs and hatchlings and Kilgarrah and Sinderorn, the dragon her father had hatched himself. He told her about their family, nearly all dead now. He had wistful stories about his little sister Adeline who had died a week before her 25th birthday and Merlin apparently looked almost exactly like her. He had nostalgic stories about his parents and aunts and uncles. They had nearly all died naturally. Balinor tripped over his words trying to talk about the cousins he had left at the end of the Purge to Uther’s pyre. He was certain that they were the only two Dragorns left. Some of the other families had had more luck.

“At least the other families survived. And your sons will be dragonlords, even without my name.”

“No,” Merlin shook her head. “I could not bear to have our family name be lost.” It was one thing about nobles that Merlin understood—the importance of not losing the family name to the oblivion of time. “I will give you my first son to raise as a dragonlord. He will be a Dragorn and his sons after him and theirs after them. The name will live on.”

“But what of the father? A child must always have two parents, after all. You could not really deprive your lover of his son bearing his name.”

“Oh, just watch me,” Merlin scoffed, tossing her hair. “Ask Mother. I’m absolutely impossible.”

“Just like Adeline, then,” her father said fondly.

They had to make camp when the sun set but they had made fairly good time even without setting a grueling pace and they reached Ealdor by midday. No one had been expecting them or hoping for them, so Merlin and some man riding in on one of Arthur’s thoroughbreds caused a bit of a stir. Her mother ran out to greet her as they were dismounting and she loudly gasped.

“Balinor?” her hand fluttered at her throat, her mouth hung open.

“Hunith,” he said warmly. “I have missed you so.”

“Who’s that?” Will asked. Her mother had fallen into her father’s arms and they were both crying as they embraced, oblivious to all the staring neighbors. Merlin turned to answer Will to give them a moment.

“My father is apparently a Dragorn.”

“That’s your father?” Will gawked.

“Yes,” Merlin nodded.

“Aren’t the Dragorns dragonlords?”

“Yes,” Merlin nodded again.

“How did you find him?”

“Arthur decided to let the dragon under the castle go and he found him. We only discovered he was my father making conversation on the way to free the dragon. He mentioned Ealdor and Mother, of course.”

“Arthur decided to free the dragon?” Will boggled at the thought.

“That was my reaction,” Merlin agreed. “He just insisted on it one morning. Went and got the old records from the purge to find a dragonlord who would agree to make Kilgarrah, that’s the dragon’s name, spare the people rather than try to get revenge.”

“Weird,” Will decided. Merlin nodded in agreement. It had been quite strange.

“Who is this?” her father echoed Will. “Your friend, you said his name was Will, did you not?”

“Yes, Father, this is Will,” Merlin introduced them. “Will, my father’s name is Balinor.” During the introduction, her mother noticed the neighbors and ushered them inside. Will politely made himself scarce. Merlin could drop by before she left, after all. Balinor told her mother about how he had ended up in a cave near Tir Mor. Merlin told her mother about the dragon and Arthur’s sudden obsession and then her father asked about how Arthur had discovered her powers so Merlin told them both of that as well and her mother scolded her roundly, constantly interrupting herself to say “I told you so”. All the important catching up, and her mother defending herself against both Merlin and Balinor for not having told Merlin of her father at all, took the majority of the afternoon and they bedded down for the night at the end of the conversation. There was an awkward moment wherein Balinor tried to insist on sleeping on the floor, but they all three ended up snuggled together in the bed for warmth. Merlin pretended not to see her father kiss her mother goodnight. She was just happy that they had found one another again.

The next morning, Merlin went over to Will’s and caught him up on the important things that had happened and showed him her new scars. She had been planning on leaving for Camelot afterwards, but Will had to introduce her to his new sweetheart. A girl who had been travelling with one of the Druid bands who had arrived for Samhain had decided to stay for him. For propriety’s sake, Matthew and his wife had taken the girl in. Her name was Caerwyn and she was absolutely lovely. After that visit, it was too late to leave, so Merlin helped her father settle in to the house and introduced him to the villagers, some of whom then recognized him.

The following morning, Merlin left right after breakfast at first light. She set a fairly fast pace, not wanting to have to spend a night in the open by herself in this weather. Thankfully, she was close enough to the castle when the sun started setting that she could continue riding. She arrived in the courtyard only a little after the sun went down. Arthur and Gwen and Morgana all met her in the courtyard, fussing over her.

“I’m fine!” Merlin tried to assure them, but Hengroen was handed off to Faolan and she was hurried inside the castle to Arthur’s chambers. Once Gwen and Morgana were assured that Merlin had a thick cloak and had not spent a night out alone, supposedly Arthur had escorted Merlin to Ealdor while on the hunting trip, which is why he had returned so late in the day, Arthur was able to shoo them out.

“Was your mother pleased?” he asked.

“Yes, very,” Merlin agreed. “She was rather cross with me about you knowing. She said she told me so too many times that I lost count.”

“Well, it’s always nice to be right about something,” Arthur teased. Merlin rolled her eyes. She soon went back to Gaius’ chambers and he fussed over her as well, making her eat a bowl of stew before he let her go to bed. It was nice to be fussed over, though Merlin pretended to Gaius to be quite irritated with him. She thought he probably knew that she appreciated him caring for her, even if she could have done without the lecture on the dangers of traveling at the end of November. The fact that the snow started to fall in earnest two days after she returned probably did not help matters.


End file.
